In which the bromancer gets a whipping and turns his tail ...

Regular followers of the reptiles will have noticed a stoush between the bromancer and honorary northern reptile Pearson in yesterday's lizard Oz ...

Pearson has, for a long time, been an honoured companion of the right wing reptile loons, and yet this fight has been brewing for some time ...

The pond thought it might be amusing to track the feud through the wrong end of the telescope ... starting with the bromancer exercising what was bizarrely called a "right of reply", but which ended up sounding like a hurt Tamworth cur abjectly licking wounds...

Pathetic really, evoking memories in the pond of the neighbour's cur, which was routinely given a thrashing, and the yelpings filling the air for blocks around ...

And so to the whipping ...

Now that's all by way of rhetorical preamble, but soon enough we get on to the appalling bromancer ...

Oh dear, he played the Maori card, a card the pond remembers it also played ... but it gets better, what with talk of flagrant intellectual dishonesty and ideological fantasies and ...

But wait, there's more, not least Boltian falsities ...

The pond just had to include that last reptile flourish ... the bromancer's "right to reply." 

He's a columnist for the reptiles, he could write a rebuttal of Pearson without dressing it up as some silly "right to reply", yet somehow they pretended it was a debate that was being conducted, rather than a damned good whipping for columns written ...

After all, the bromancer had already rabbited on endlessly, in a way clearly designed to provoke the likes of Pearson, which naturally brings the pond to what provoked the whipping, which provoked the bromancer into yelping away like a stricken cur ...

These past few weeks, the bromancer has been banging on in a vacuum, imagining no one reads his words, or if they do, no one cared about what he was saying ...

Here's the immediate outing that started the fuss...

It's the condescending tone, the patriarchal condescension, the living embodiment of colonial superiority that probably tweaked Pearson's nose ... which admittedly is notoriously sensitive, without having a bit of bromancer chilli thrust up it.

Frankly no one does the chilli thrust better than the bromancer ...

All this blather about the United States, as if it's the model, would be likely to try the patience of a saint, let alone a Pearson ...

But wait, there's more. The pond has already run this piece, but the cumulative weight of evidence requires that it be run again ...

Yes, even before the pesky difficult blacks had met and considered, the bromancer had announced that the fix was in.

Ostensibly it might have been considered a piece as much about the failing, flailing useless wimpy wet Liberals, aka a covert attack on Malware and a celebration of the onion muncher, as an attack on the pesky blacks ...

But every line was Boltian, a Boltian diatribe in effect demonising uppity, difficult blacks seeking an exceptional place in the sun for themselves, because everyone in country is equal (except perhaps in matters educational, jail time, job opportunities, life expectancy and other minor, trivial matters of no import):

Yes, it's always the difficult, demanding, impossible to satisfy pesky blacks making things tricky for considered, considerate folk at the Catholic Boys' Daily, when let's face it, they've never had it so good, and are way more advantaged than any other group in this lucky country ...

It says something about the bromancer's delusions that he should manage to add on talk of the ABC, climate science, Bjorn Lomborg, Catholic education and even append an Oy vey ...

And don't forget putting the boot into pesky blacks, and prodding Pearson with a stick! Oh and ABC and climate science!

But in all this, does the pond have much sympathy for Pearson?

Not really ... if you lie down with reptiles, as he has regularly over the years, you shouldn't be surprised to discover they are actually reptiles ...

And you should expect to lose a leg or two ... it's not the same as picking up a flea or two from lying down with dogs ...

Start off with this ...

... and you'll always end up with this ...

And so to that First Dog 'sorry day' which comes in handy almost every day ...