Saturday, March 25, 2023

In which the pond is late to get going, but still has to pay a dog botherer and bromancer price ...

 


The pond slept in this day - perhaps it's the change of seasons, the changing of the clocks, the sodden sense of it being a sodden cockroach election day - and so decided to pare back its reptile coverage, and discovered the task of doing the culling was surprisingly easy ...






The pond has lost all interest in the Bjorn-again one since he abandoned straight out climate science denialism for distraction - even the irony of blather about "global dithering" couldn't stir the pond - and it was exceptionally easy to defer Polonius's anal retentive obsession with the ABC to Sunday's meditation ...

The pond rarely visits the oscillating fan, and the Angelic one on education is simply too much. 

Sure there were other reptiles scribbling elsewhere, and one might be a surprise Sunday guest, but for today, the pond was content to observe the dog botherer writhing on the spit of defeatism ...








Newsflash to the dog botherer. The elegantly fair and worthwhile concept of an Indigenous voice isn't being destroyed by mere politicians, though some of his chums in that arena are surely helping.

But more importantly, it's being destroyed on a daily basis by the dog botherer's News Corp chums, and that's why the pond passed on "Ned", nattering on this day in his usual destructive manner, positioned in a prime position, at the centre of the reptile triptych of terror ...









The pond didn't stick that blank white space in the middle. That's the reptiles way of evoking an intellectual void, a comment on the vapid offerings of the gloom-laden dotard ... and with that noted and avoided and out of the way, it's back to the dog botherer's defeatism, as he tries to argue with the lizard Oz elder in his dotage...






Meanwhile, speaking of powers, and a voice rampaging across government, was that the reason the reptiles decided to stick this at the top of the digital page?








Forget Max and his date stamp of "57 minutes ago". 

Last night precisely at 10.15 pm, the pond took a screen snap of his piece dated "44 minutes ago", proving that the reptiles lie as easily about the freshness of their product as a butcher does when he injects a little carbon monoxide to give aged meat a fresh, reddish-pink look ...

Who knows if Max's call will turn into a new Arizona, and some day we'll be reading a bizzaro world (Htrae to some) version of Inside the Panic at Faux Noise After the 2023 election?

No, the important news was that already difficult, pesky, uppity blacks are making suggestions and the reptiles thought it was good enough for the tree killer edition too with talk of "Noel's way" ...








Oh and forget that trip into anti-vaxxer turf and saucy reptile doubts and saucy reptile fears, and instead it's back to the doubting dog botherer, and his deep love for Noel, a love other reptiles have abandoned, but a love to which the doggie boy stays  true ...







Poor dog botherer. At this point, someone crueller than the pond might insert an extended bit of "Ned's" rant ... railing against identity politics gone mad ...







Oh wait, did the pond just slip in a bit of "Ned's" ranting? 

The pond has no idea where it's desire to be cruel to the dog botherer comes from, but all that ranting has produced a defeatist doggie boi ... because if doggie boi has one rule, it's never to bite the Murdochian hand that feeds him, and certainly not to get into a rumble in the jungle with "Ned" ...

Instead how easy it is for the dog botherer to fall into line with "Ned" and blame it all on Albo, as if the neigh saying reptiles and the naying mutton Dutton have nothing to do with it ...







A crueller person than the pond would immediately riposte with another sample of "Ned" ... 

Oh wait, the pond is inclined to be cruel and beastly to dog botherers, and what better way to follow up that last gobbet of doggie boi than with another gobbet of a 'leet member of the Murdochian 'leets blathering on mindlessly about 'leets for his closer ...









That's as much of "Ned" as the pond could stand this day, but it's enough to get the flavour.

It's all Albanese's fault, and apparently the support of all those black leaders means naught in the world of the reptiles ... there they all were, failing the "Ned" test, as Albo did his Christ pose ...









What a relief to turn to the bromancer and world affairs and yet another serve of defeatism ...

As a certified manic depressive, sometimes the mania kicks in with the bromancer, and sometimes the depression, and the sight of Vlaid the Impaler and dictator for life Xi sent the bromancer right off ...






As usual, the pond doesn't know what to think or who to believe...

A few days ago, there was talk of a snub, per Yahoo ... and a hint that things might be more complicated than in the bromancer's world ...








But there was no way to cheer up the bromancer as he rushes off to talk to the 'leets about the grave situation, and the impending third world war, though what the reptiles are doing talking to 'leets is simply beyond "Ned's" comprehension ...







What a remarkable metaphor, and who knew the bromancer was a y'artz lover, but operatic symmetry is all the go, even if it seems the bromancer is now accepting that the third act, war with China and with Russia, must happen no later than Xmas ...

Oh wait, the subs will save us ...






But what of the subs salvation? Hold on, they're coming, it just takes a time when the bromancer gets into his stride and pounds away at the keyboards, in a geo political strategic, neigh, deeply operatic way, as sundry Baron Scarpias lurk in the wings ...






More defeatism from the bromancer, but what of those subs and the salvation the pond promised? Just around the corner, though the bromancer specialises in producing long blocks before you get to the corner ...






There you go. How could anyone have doubted?

Just stick a Roller in the garage and all will be well, though at that point the pond wondered if it might be some other sort of American road car and had a curious flashback to an infallible Pope ...








Roller? Bah humbug, there's nothing like a rebadged Lincoln ... 

But what of trade? Covered ...





 





... and so to the final gobbet ...







How the bromancer yearns for war with China, and better still world war III by Xmas, and yet there's a certain hesitation and doubt on parade today, and so the pond turned to the immortal Rowe for comfort and an end to the day's proceedings ...









Yes, there is a Santa Claus and there is hope, Virginia, it's all in the details ...








As for the pond, a cup of tea is the answer to it all ...






Friday, March 24, 2023

In which the pond cuts its reptile content down to WWHET so it can fit in some WWTT ...

 





Today became an exercise in the pond reminding itself that there was another world outside the land of the reptiles, so why not start with Cathy Wilcox, celebrating the cockroaches voting for leader of the cockroaches? 

It's a tad academic for the pond, having voted last Monday - instant access but no fundraising patticake - but you see, this day in bizarro reptile world, all they can blather about is the voice...

There were these items at the top of the digital page ...



 



The pond has a passing fair contempt for simplistic "no conflict of interest here" Simon, and ditto Warren "I'm just here for myself" Mundine, and it was typical of the reptiles to brand a democratic exercise a brawl, and so there was nothing to tempt the pond there ...

The tree killer edition was full of it too, where the brawl became "all or nothing change" ...




The pond has more than passing contempt for what the Nine papers have become - tragic, pathetic - but see how they framed the debate at the top of the digital page ...





There, right at the bottom was the cawing Crowe, late of the lizard Oz, and he appeared in The Age's digital edition, but you had to squint a little to spot him in the throng of the passing parade  ...






Ah the footy. how could the pond have forgotten the footy?

Meanwhile, back at the lizard Oz, they were obsessed in the commentary section as well ...






The craven Craven? George pandering to the reptiles by appearing behind the paywall? The meretricious Merritt carrying on in his usual way? Talk about Sophie's choice. At least she had a choice ...

Gone was the chance for the pond to discuss other matters, the situation wth Boris, the devious behaviour of the mango Mussolini, or even WaPo, at last talking to actual trans people ...






It's the pond's experience that few people have actually talked with a trans person, let alone understood the how and the why. 

The pond's trans friend isn't out, and rarely talks of the humiliations endured at the hands of the Catholic church, uncomprehending parents, a brutal, bullying school system, a brutal, bullying institutional psychiatric mob, electric shock treatments and so on and so forth, yet finally emerging to lead a life at one with inner self, and to all external appearances, successful at work and in a long standing relationship ... and distinctly non-athletic, which makes the latest barbarism and persecution at least irrelevant, if nonetheless hurtful to others ...

But the pond knew that it had to feature at least one reptile to stay true to its mission, and so it decided on a "WWTT" approach, or if you will, "What Would Thucydides Think"?

But the pond decided on a spoiler by way of starting with a guessing competition...

Which pompous reptile with his head stuck firmly up his arse would end his piece this way?

If anything, that experience should inspire extreme caution, while also highlighting the importance of fully disclosing to the “sleeping sovereign” the dangers that lie ahead. Blinking in the sunlight, we may be about to make another fateful error; let us at least do so without being blinded by illusions.

Yes all this puffer fish has got is fear mongering, and a goodly dose of cant, and WWTT?

“Some legislators only wish to vengeance against a particular enemy. Others only look out for themselves. They devote very little time on the consideration of any public issue. They think that no harm will come from their neglect. They act as if it is always the business of somebody else to look after this or that. When this selfish notion is entertained by all, the commonwealth slowly begins to decay. ” 

It's not the best translation, but it's the thought that counts, and so, having set the scene, on with the hole in the bucket man ...




WWTT?

“Most people, in fact, will not take the trouble in finding out the truth, but are much more inclined to accept the first story they hear.” 
“Right, as the world goes, is only in question between equals in power, while the strong do what they can and the weak suffer what they must.” 

Of course the pond could have quoted the immortal Rowe ...








Ah, but that would make the tremulous, fearful, spineless, gormless, fear mongering hole in the bucket man blink in the sunlight ... while the pond might revert to its hippie days and start singing about letting the sunshine in ...




The bloody Germans? Thomas Hobbes? Canadians? Europeans?

Bugger it, WWTT?

“When will there be justice in Australia? There will be justice in Australia when those who are not injured are as outraged as those who are.” 

Okay, he meant Athens, but inspired by the hole in the bucket man's irrelevant bullshit, the pond felt up for a little historical revisionism ...

“When one is deprived of ones liberty, one is right in blaming not so much the man who puts the shackles on as the one who had the power to prevent him, but did not use it.” 

Speaking of shackles, on with another gobbet of a shackled mind ...






Put it another way ...

“Men's indignation, it seems, is more excited by legal wrong than by violent wrong; the first looks like being cheated by an equal, the second like being compelled by a superior.” 

Sure, it should have read "men's and women's" or a more inclusive "people", but it took a long time for pompous asses to even begin to consider women as equals, or discuss notions of inclusivity, as opposed to treating people as property ...

Meanwhile, the fear mongering continued, the smug anticipation of defeat, the celebration of hopelessness ...




WWTT?

“A collision at sea will ruin your entire day” 

Perhaps he foresaw the future, and meant "a collision with a holey Henry will ruin your entire day ..."

More seriously there was this assessment of the ways and means of the whole colonial enterprise ...

“They stood where they stood by the right of the sword.”

And there was this ...

“If it had not been for the pernicious power of envy, men would not so have exalted vengeance above innocence and profit above justice... in these acts of revenge on others, men take it upon themselves to begin the process of repealing those general laws of humanity which are there to give a hope of salvation to all who are in distress.” 

And as for all that reptile blather about unseemly brawling and an all or nothing war?

“Think, too, of the great part that is played by the unpredictable in war: think of it now, before you are actually committed to war. The longer a war lasts, the more things tend to depend on accidents. Neither you nor we can see into them: we have to abide their outcome in the dark. And when people are entering upon a war they do things the wrong way round. Action comes first, and it is only when they have already suffered that they begin to think.” 

So much more interesting than WWHET ... but there's only a short gobbet of that left, as he blinks, as bats always do when exposed to sunlight ...





Really? All he's got is fear? A quavering, whimpering, craven fear? If the pond wants craven fear, it'll head off for a dose from the craven Craven, and if it wants death by legal sword, there's always the meretricious Merritt. But this pathetic blinking?

If anything, that experience should inspire extreme caution, while also highlighting the importance of fully disclosing to the “sleeping sovereign” the dangers that lie ahead. Blinking in the sunlight, we may be about to make another fateful error; let us at least do so without being blinded by illusions.

Really?  But we know the answer ...

“Some legislators only wish to vengeance against a particular enemy. Others only look out for themselves. They devote very little time on the consideration of any public issue. They think that no harm will come from their neglect. They act as if it is always the business of somebody else to look after this or that. When this selfish notion is entertained by all, the commonwealth slowly begins to decay. ” 

And so all we're left with is fear itself ...

So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is...fear itself — nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. In every dark hour of our national life, a leadership of frankness and of vigor has met with that understanding and support of the people themselves which is essential to victory. And I am convinced that you will again give that support to leadership in these critical days. (Roosevelt)

WWTT? In the sense of Thoreau?

Miss Martineau’s last book is not so bad as the timidity which fears its influence. As if the popularity of this or that book would be so fatal, and man would not still be man in the world. Nothing is so much to be feared as fear. Atheism may comparatively be popular with God himself.
What shall we say of these timid folk who carry the principle of thinking nothing and doing nothing and being nothing to such an extreme? As if, in the absence of thought, that vast yearning of their natures for something to fill the vacuum made the least traditionary expression and shadow of a thought to be clung to with instinctive tenacity. They atone for their producing nothing by a brutish respect for something. They are as simple as oxen, and as guiltless of thought and reflection. Their reflections are reflected from other minds. The creature of institutions, bigoted and a conservatist, can say nothing hearty. He cannot meet life with life, but only with words. He rebuts you by avoiding you. He is shocked like a woman...

Did Thoreau just call our Henry a girlie?

Ah well, Thoreau was scribbling way back when, in the days when women were property and the notion of inclusivity certainly didn't extend to those who had lived in America before the invaders arrived ...

And so here we are, back where we started, on a suburban lawn, concerned about mowing the grass ...






The pond can't believe it's doing this, but what the heck, in for a penny, in for a pond, and the effects are so gormless and Countdown, it's impossible not to be charmed by the innocence, as the pond heads back to the days when it danced on the stage at the Metro and blissed out ...






Thursday, March 23, 2023

In which the reptiles leave the pond a little short, and there's only war with China by Xmas and Nazis ...

 


Thursday is always a quiet day for the lizard Oz, or at least the pond observing the reptiles at play, because of the ongoing ban on petulant Peta, unsurprisingly off with the ratbag bigoted alleged radical feminists at one with Nazis ...



It's just more trans bashing, business as usual for busy Nazi-loving reptiles, but there was an oopsie across the digital page ...




Yes it's tough times for people spouting bigotry of the kind that Nazis love, but the good news is that yesterday Marina Hyde returned, about time, because the pond was getting desperate, until  Decision time: did habitual liar Boris Johnson tell some lies? It’s going to be tense landed ...

The pond got suitably tense with chortles, but sadly the pond couldn't stay awake long enough to see Boris's performance, what with it being in the UK afternoon ...

When the pond checked in with Sky before nodding off, all that had dropped were the briefing papers. 

So the pond was left this morning with Martin Kettle and Boris Johnson has been sliced and diced. The real winner is Rishi Sunak.

The Graudian's UK edition was in full flight for those who cared ...




Exit Boris, come on down tax returns, but the real tell came in another story ...Boris Johnson and Liz Truss among 22 Tory rebels as NI Brexit plan passes.

Trussed up in a rump of 22? 

The pond hopes that a marinating Hyde and the cracking Crace, Impervious to advice or rules, Johnson held up the shield of stupidity, can squeeze some juice out of Rish!'s tax returns.

How will the pond and cartoonists survive? Is there nothing left but to drop a little poop on the statues?





 

Meanwhile, the pond was left looking a little threadbare ...





Desperate times, and so in desperation, the pond turned to Jennings, whom the pond routinely mistook as the lad who attended Linbury Court prep school in England ...






Jokes about neighsayers whinnying and whining aside, this Jennings was recently a star in a Media Watch piece, War with China? ...

For those who came in late ...

... it’s dire alright — seems World War III is on the way. 
Because there it was, screaming out of the front page of The Age and Sydney Morning Herald on Tuesday, in the first of an alarming three-part series.
With the two papers chorusing: 
"Australia faces the real prospect of a war with China within three years that could involve a direct attack on our mainland …" - The Age/Sydney Morning Herald, 7 March, 2023
That warning of imminent attack came with a comic-book sketch of jets flying out of red China to bomb Australia. 
So, who was sounding the air raid alarm?
A panel of five science and security experts, assembled by the Nine papers and by international editor Peter Hartcher — who is a well-known China hawk — and featuring Peter Jennings, who has made a habit of predicting that conflict with China is coming. 
Jennings told readers: 
“It really is all about China, China, China.” - Sydney Morning Herald, 7 March, 2023
And he added: “This is not about 10 to 20 years; it’s really three years.” - Sydney Morning Herald, 7 March, 2023
There was no contrary view and no shading of the possibilities. 
So, maybe those views got a look in on day two of Red Alert, when the Herald and Age followed up with this:
"How a conflict over Taiwan could swiftly reach our shores" - The Age/Sydney Morning Herald, 8 March, 2023
But no. Instead, we got more alarming predictions from Jennings:
"Within 72 hours of a conflict breaking out over Taiwan, Chinese missile bombardments and devastating cyberattacks on Australia would begin. For the first time since World War II, the mainland would be under attack." - The Age, 8 March, 2023
So who is Jennings? 

The pond saw enough Saturday matinee serials in its time to recognise it's cliffhanger time, and decided to leave that question lingering.

First there must be another gobbet ...






The pond hates to interrupt a listicle just when it's got going, but the pond feels guilty about leaving that cliffhanger. Time for the next episode, and as always, we must begin the episode with the line where the last ep. left off...






There are two things in that episode the pond particularly loved ...that bit about funding supplied by a bevy of arms dealers, and war being measured not in years but in months ...

Now back to the listicle ...






Of course Media Watch didn't quite get it right and had to issue a clarification ... ASPI says Jennings no longer plays an active role with the institute and it was not involved in framing the Age and Herald’s report. ASPI also says it receives funding from only 4 defence manufacturers and it’s 2 per cent of their budget.

But why take anything? Even a little cash in the paw from defence manufacturers makes you look and sound like apologist gooses ...

And what happened to Jennings, prime prognosticator of gloom and dedicated war hawk?

The pond had no idea, and wondered if this report in IA happened to be true?

...Jennings had previously been CEO of the Australian Strategic and Policy Institute (ASPI) before he was replaced by Opposition Leader Peter Dutton on 29 February 2022, 12 days before the writs for the 2022 Election were issued and the Government went into caretaker mode. Dutton and former PM Scott Morrison then fought the Election on their coming “war with China” policies and the L-NP suffered its most massive electoral defeat ever. 
Dutton replaced Jennings with Justin Bassi, whose previous job was chief of staff to L-NP Foreign Minister Marise Payne. Before that, Bassi had worked in Malcolm Turnbull’s office and before that, for L-NP Attorney-General George Brandis. As well as appointing this ex-Coalition staffer to replace Jennings as head of ASPI, Dutton also appointed former L-NP Ministers John Anderson and Michael Keenan to the board of ASPI. 
ASPI is supposed to be an independent, non-partisan body that provides military and strategic advice to Australian governments. Dutton’s stacking of ASPI’s board with former L-NP ministers and staffers, weeks before an election the L-NP was expected to lose, shreds any lingering doubts about ASPI’s bi-partisanship. Dutton’s selections were bipartisan only in the sense that he chose both a former Liberal and a former National Party minister. All jokes aside, it was surprising that John Barilaro wasn’t appointed to the ASPI board.

Yes, a Barilaro joke really is all jokes aside, but meanwhile that listicle was still unfolding ...






Some might wonder if the pond had actually been reading the thoughts of this ozard, sometimes ozard squared, or ozard cubed, but the pond stopped paying attention when this latterday Jennings assured Oz readers - the other Ozards - that submarine detection would stay in stasis for decades, apparently unaware that it would be decades before we actually had the subs needed for the war over Taiwan that was going to happen within months ...

A man with these predictive skills really should take a powder, but inevitably is back at home in the lizard Oz, after helping gee up the Nine rags ...

And so to a final, thankfully brief, flourish ...



Yes, it's China, China, China, and they'll have their war by Xmas if it kills them ...

And so to a bonus, and sad to say, it had nothing to do with this infallible Pope outing ...






There's a real opportunity for an opposition that cared about climate science and the planet ...

Okay, that's another Barilaro joke, as befits an opposition led by a mutton denialist Dutton imitating a potato ... is potato ... and beefy boofhead Angus stationed in Goulburn and still nurturing a deep, undying hatred for windmills...

Instead the mob who picked devious Deves and hoped to win on culture war issues (not to mention war with China) were still at that game, and naturally the bouffant one was there to cheer them on ...





Bashing trans people in a bigoted way had been such fun and then the Nazis came along and ruined the game ...

Such spoilsports, and at this point the reptiles inserted a snap of a gloomy Dreyfus ... so the pond cut it down to size ...






So a dummy spit is reckoned to be a sublime example of politicians at the top of their game? So it seems, and make sure to blame the other mob for the dummy spit, and never mind the culture war games and the likes of the devious Deves and the other cranks and eccentrics and bigots littering the Liberal party of late ...






Yep, they had a dummy spit, and what a pity that the Nazis came out to play and ruined the sport of trans bashing ... and as for talking about Nazis...

...The Liberal Party's former candidate for the federal NSW seat of Warringah, who is also the co-founder of Save Women's Sport, was strongly criticised last year after a number of now-deleted comments on social media resurfaced.
In them, Ms Deves called trans children "surgically mutilated and sterilised" and likened her lobbying to stop transgender athletes from competing in women’s sport to standing up against the Nazis during the Holocaust.

Oh dear ....

And so to Wilcox, announcing peace in our time, and perhaps Jennings of the fifth form might at some point turn his attention to the shit going down in Ukraine...