The reptiles have been giving our Adam a real pounding in the past few days, and today's EXCLUSIVE immediately made the pond wonder whether the brave Murdochian had been the first cab off the rank …
The google timing seemed suspect, with the HUN in the lead by some five hours …
Further investigation into the matter was warranted, like an AFP plod determined to do their best by the mutton Dutton and the police state …but waddya know, our Adam was first …
However, our Adam's EXCLUSIVE missed out on the astonishing HUN EXCLUSIVE… more than half a billion people will flee Australia by the end of 2020 ...
Now in the old days the pond was always tortured by the definition of old school billion versus modern billion …(here)
Either way, it seemed like the HUNsters had discovered a modern miracle … but then isn't this what the reptiles have always yearned for, the expulsion of difficulty, tricky furriners, undermining our Anglo-Celtic Xian way of life with their preverted ways?
Speaking of miracles, the pond wonders how many more reptiles will join in the rage at the ABC …
Sorry, the pond can't go there. Whenever the reptiles talk of groupthink, the pond bursts into uncontrollable laughter, especially in this past week of slavish Pellist group thinkery, and never mind the real victims …
So instead the pond turned to the calmer waters of the savvy Savva …
Right from the get go, the pond liked the idea.
If teachers can be made to trot off to attend a pack of virus carriers, without state-supplied PPE, then the least the pollies can do is show how it's done, lead from the front, and go over the top, facing down the viral machine guns ...
Sheesh, this is a tad removed from our Adam, wringing his hands about thousands fleeing, yet not giving a toss about the dying.
Did one of the reptiles just discover that there are people dying out there, and it's having a devastating effect, not least the fear that goes with it?
But there will be cartoons, won't there? At least we can have cartoons …at least the goods can keep flowing here ...
And so to the Savva's spiffing idea … let the pollies show the way to getting back to work. Let them return to Canberra, and preside over the national crisis … let them show their stuff, though it's too much to hope it would be the right stuff ...
And so, having banned the bromancer, the pond had to look around for a substitute fielder … and the best it could come up with was an import, with, by any standards, a woeful illustration at top of page …
The pond pressed on, because if nothing else, there would be a chance for a few cartoons …
Uh, but the pond isn't entirely convinced. How did so many conclude that the United States was the dominant power and enjoyed divine support and that the Donald had shown his superiority?
Talk about infallible mysteries that no historical allusion might explain.
Never mind, we must continue with our historical analysis …
But what about when mind pools join up, and the result is a mutant? Could an addiction to fast food have destroyed an entire civilisation?
And so to the good news, because the pond had waded on, until it came across a redeeming feature … the presence of the cult master ...
Now right there, Finkelstein lost the pond with his tedious, tiresome talk of war and the Blitz spirit (some have even invoked Dunkirk, apparently unaware of what actually happened and why the Poms were clustered on the beach), and his use of the "Kumbaya view" was one of those triggers that made the pond determined to focus on the masterwork by the cult master that accompanied his blather ...
The pond generally leaves interpretations of these masterworks to experts in the field, but couldn't help being torn between a Rivera mural, Soviet and Nazi art ...
But after that excitement came a tedious bit. To pad out the piece, the reptiles decided to do some graphics …
The pond includes them for completeness, but as usual, they're completely useless ...
+42k?
Well, that + is doing a lot of work, because according to John Hopkins here, it's already at 133,354, and the US is winning in every way … though strangely by keeping it down to state level, the chart didn't show the true extent of the winning… because the US is heading towards 30k and soon will be at +42 k all on its own, and is working even harder to keep on with the winning ...
And so to another useless graph ...
The pond has no idea why the reptiles bother with that sort of graph when there's real time charting of the epidemic …
Why not just run another cheerful cartoon …
But as we were talking about the divide, between the delusional, the deplorable, and some with a remote grasp of reality, here's a classic example …
Now you won't find the pond defending China, which in the usual way of a dictatorship, has acted disgracefully, with usual, but useless, secrecy. And the WHO has a case to answer, for its cosy relationship to China and its support of wet markets …
But really the Donald should take much of the credit for the way that the virus has run through the United States like a hot knife in cold margarine.
But where is the reptile headline? Where are the reptiles when it comes to following the ancient art of Donald distraction? Why did the federal government decide to stick with WHO funding?
When will we see this splash: Donald Trump's response has worsened disaster. News Corp, which promoted him, should offer an apology and demand a thorough reform, so that this sort of travesty doesn't occur again …
And now to the final gobbet, and the pond must confess a lack of interest in poor old Finkelstein ...
The 1930s? Dictatorships? But we already have a delusional fool that thinks he's king, and more of a George III than a sensible monarch …
And so to a wrap up. The pond has been missing the infallible Pope, and this week The Canberra Times did a piece about a decade of his cartooning.
So why not return to the good times, and shed a tear at the nostalgia, when all we had was the reptiles, climate science, belief in imaginary friends, and talk of there being too many furriners in the land …
DP - I thank you for showing the brief reference to Dame Slap yesterday, but not going there. I was bemused by someone with her awesome legal qualifications writing about a need to ‘restore fairness’ in court proceedings. For a few moments I wondered if a Doctor of Juridical Science should even be speculating on airy fairy concepts like ‘fairness’. Was she, like the other Dame, displaying signs of slipping back to experience in actual research? However, Wikipedia shows (and the ‘Rare Books and Special Collections’ section of the University of Sydney library confirms) her thesis was titled -
ReplyDelete"The regulation of the fundraising process in Australia: searching for an optimal mix between legislative prescriptions and market forces”.
so not a lot of residual harm to the profession likely to come from that.
It did lead me to scan a few other, mainly academic, legals, who appear more frequently in journals of tiny circulation, such as ‘Spectator’ and ‘Quadrant’, with occasional mention in the flagship.
One such is Augusto Zimmermann, who tries to make a case that our legal system derives absolutely from Christianity. In his logic, it can derive only from Christianity, because there is no alternative. Any other proposition is tainted by that dreadful heresy ‘Darwinian evolution’, so can be discounted without further thought.
He also frequently references Dame Slap, with great approval; not that that has produced regular invitations to ‘contribute’ to the flagship.
Dr Augusto requires almost as much space to list his credentials and affiliations - past and present - as he needs for his scholarly thoughts. So we come to the revelation - Dr Augusto currently is Professor and Head of Law at Sheridan College in Perth.
There is a Sheridan College. In Perth. Founded by Baptists.
For a few moments - . But, no, just as Murdoch University is NOT named for Rupert, but for his great-uncle Sir Walter, (whom Wikipedia notes was an ‘essayist famous for his intelligence and wit’) the name Sheridan College was not chosen to immortalise the Bromancer. Its site says the name is derived from a Celtic term (forgive my not reproducing the accents here) meaning ‘seeker’.
So there is the new thing I learned today. Thought it would share it with you all.
Other Anonymous.
And much entertaining learning there is to be shared, OA. And very glad to see that, unlike me and I suspect most fellow pondians, you (1) know of the existence of the ‘Rare Books and Special Collections’ section of the University of Sydney library and (2) can find your way around it, to our continuing enlightenment.
Delete"So much to learn, so little time" as a Peter Sellers character once ejaculated (following right after "How many times do I have to tell you to hold points away from you)."
However, regarding being "tainted by that dreadful heresy ‘Darwinian evolution’", I do wonder when, if ever, the wingnuts and wannabe reptiles will cotton on that 'Darwinian evolution' has been somewhat passe for at least half a century. Science doesn't just sit on its arse forever, even though the reptiles and wingnuts obviously do.
DP - in meandering about (above) I neglected to thank you also for the Pope retrospective. Lifted my day.
ReplyDeleteOther Anonymous
Quite an emotional lament today from the Savviest Savv, particularly this bit: "Another lesson is that life is too precious to waste."
ReplyDeleteThere's only one problem with that: given the nature of the universe, whether or not you believe in invisible friends, it is completely impossible both not to waste a life and to completely waste a life. What can you achieve in a human life ? Have a few kids and keep most of them alive to adulthood ? Add something to 'human knowledge' ? Does Savviest Savv really think the human race is immortal ?
What will any of that matter to anybody in 100,000 years ? In 1,000,000 years ? And even if you fondly believe in one particular 'invisible friend' what will that matter after rapturously singing God's praises for every moment of eternity with an eternity of the same to come for every moment of eternity forever. Because after all Christ said: "And no man hath ascended up to heaven, but he that came down from heaven". So, did we all "come down from heaven" ? Because if we did, there's already billions of us up there, and the noise must be deafening.
Also, the less said by, to, and about Finkelstein the better. And the reptiles have used those "completely useless" graphs already; I guess it takes a lot of time for the word to seep out to the The Times.
And seconding the thanks for the Pope retrospective DP.
On singing God's praises, see Peter Cook and Dudley Moore https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7v9nzfYZAFk
Delete:-) Says just about everything that needs to be said, Joe.
DeleteThe pond muses:
ReplyDelete"Now in the old days the pond was always tortured by the definition of old school billion versus modern billion …"
This is why we should use SI prefixes for everything which is quantifiable. For example: if we say "a gigaperson" there is no confusion about whether we are referring to a group of 1,000,000,000 or 1,000,000,000,000 (hypothetical) people.
Hi TT,
DeleteA pox on your Système international d'unités with is unhealthy connotations of the French Revolution.
It’s the ever practical FFF system for me.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FFF_system
DW
Ah tres bon, ma cherie. Personally, I only ever acknowledge the mksa units, but that seems very gauche now in view of the obvious universal appeal of FFF.
DeleteBut let us also remember that google is just a wordplay on googol. And who has never wanted a googol ?
Hi DP,
ReplyDeleteRe today’s quite figurative Lobbecke. Continuing his theme of revolutionary struggle the cult master is no doubt drawing inspiration from the exploits of his ill-fated distant relative Egor Lobbkevitch - a corporal in the conscripted Sharpshooter Squad at the Siege of Koronagrad.
Armed with 200 litre capacity bazooka-syringes containing hydroxychloroquine, front-line soldiers were tasked with squirting jets of the untested virucide at an invisible (and technically dead) enemy - represented here by stock internet virus memes and an ominous purple haze.
Essentially suicide missions, the hapless artillerymen suffered massive fatalities when they discovered that the liquid in their hypodermic cannons, issued under orders from General Trumpkin, was actually discount swimming pool cleaner and their protective suits were meant only for use during mosquito fumigation.
The straining bodies, grimacing faces, and weirdly splayed hands of the doomed fighters effectively portray selfless human acts in the face of catastrophic events. The fact that they have totally missed their target and propelled the contents into outer space epitomises the futility of their efforts. Triumphant in failure, the heroes of Koronograd are now immortalised in Lobbecke’s paean to anti-viral lunacy.
Are you sure you don't do this for a living, Kez ? :-)
DeleteA masterly exegesis, Kez ...
DeleteMany thanks DP! And no GB - it's purely an amateur pastime for me. It's a case of catching up on pursuits that were shelved earlier in life in order to focus on a non-literary career. But I do appreciate that you would think my musings worthy of remuneration. Cheers.
DeleteWere Pete and Dud ever that young?
ReplyDeleteIt was a messy Divorce.
Best title for an autobiography.....Peter Cook's, Alas,I Was an Only Twin