But when the reptiles offer you a hand like this on a Friday, what can you do?
The pond had been wondering for some time where old favourites like the onion muncher and dashing Donners had been lurking, and now like the plague, here at least is the OM man himself …
It bewildered the pond. The reptiles this week have been in a feral rage about the return of Malware, and yet the most incompetent Prime Minister in recent times (and with Malware that's a low bar) gets to play the part of a grand statesman? And offer portentous pronouncements on the state of things?
Not to worry, the pond will never understand the machinations and deeper mysteries of the reptile mind, and settled for a lead with the two of clubs …
By golly, the clichés spring in a spritely manner from the onion muncher keyboard … and then to add to the current nightmare, the pond had a nightmare moment imagining what might have been happening if the Knights and Dames man was still in charge …
Thanks for that reality check young Adam … and now perhaps break suit, and lead with the two of spades? Does that symbolise the bleeding obvious? All the pond can recall is its German peasant grandmother recoiling in horror whenever the ace of spades turned up. But the two? "Sometimes associated with moral weakness, the two of spades shows a situation that does not evolve." (here)
Well that sort of fits, and it's better than playing the five of diamonds … what with money a sore point.
Oh porridge wouldn't melt in his mouth. Climate change gone away, identity politics no long an issue, green tape wound back, some of the culture war institutions that have divided us abandoned …
Say what, the lizard Oz and the Murdochian tabloids are going to cease publication? Or at least no longer provide space for cultural warriors of the onion muncher kind?
In your dreams, though the pond understands that there is real suffering out there in the world …
As for that talk of the economy chloroformed by the left, could he have possibly devised a more cultural warrior image?
When the evening is spread out against the sky
Like a patient etherized upon a table;
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
The muttering retreats
Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
Streets that follow like a tedious argument
Of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming question ...
Oh, do not ask, “What is it?”
Let us go and make our visit.
But to whom should we make our visit? Well, the onion muncher isn't the only one to return. The infallible Pope is back too …
Ah that's better, now cop a final three of spades, symbol of weakness and resignation, the card that evokes the degradation of a situation ...
There should be less dogma ...I'd be inclined … I'd make it about …?
And it's the society stupid? Oh w're all socialists now, we all recant into our manly beer …
It's amazing what happens when the grim reaper strolls the streets, not least blithe insouciance on the part of the onion muncher, as the salmon mousse does its thing in this immortal Rowe, with a lively discussion here …
And so to our hole in the bucket man Henry, and to borrow that scintillating analysis from the onion muncher, there's good news and bad news …
On the good news front, our Henry has been blessed by a visit from the cult master, down from his eerie in the Arctic, where he bunkers down near Santa and Superman …
The bad news is that no-one seems to know where our Henry has been these last five years …
Say what? Just where has Henry been, while Gladys fucks up the inner west and develops fine opportunities for real estate developers.
The pond only inserts these news snippets to remind us of times gone by …
The project announced in 2015? A futile attempt at an inquiry in June 2016? Such ancient, perverse and wilful history.
And now suddenly our Henry is on board? Sheesh, how to get rid of the Jack of Clubs the pond is holding before it gets caught out …
Indeed, indeed, or as Hebrews 15 put it, "If they had been thinking of the country they had left, or at least the building in the inner west they had demolished, they would have had the opportunity to return."
The milk spilled so long ago, like Onan's seed, and now we have more spillage by our Henry … but to what avail?
And so to what our Henry really misses … the glorious talk of the glory of the "Anglo-Saxon race" ...
Ah, there, did anyone else clap hands and sing with joy? It's the old billy goat ploy.
None of that is to suggest that we ought to hanker for that area …. nor could anyone claim the museum was always well-funded and well-managed …
Oh come Henry, keep your thoughts consistent for at least a nanosecond, relish your Anglo-Saxon love … hanker for that era. Your piece is full of hankering, and you might contend that's better than Onan's wankering …
Here, have a hanker on the pond ...
Ah, those were the Frank Hurley days … but now, of course, having had the "none of that", we must now quickly move on to the very big "Butt", much loved by English sea side postcards …
Sorry about that, the pond went all misty-eyed and dewy about glorious Anglo-Saxon culture … now on with the "Butt"...
What did you do in the war with Gladys, daddy?
Oh I wrote a fine, moving, elegiac piece for the lizard Oz, five years after it mattered, and no one noticed and no one cared, because the fickle finger of fate had long moved on, and the lizards of Oz do so worship the doings of the Liberal party… and only carry on when the exercise is completely useless and completely fucking pointless, but it at least it allows them to wax on about Anglo-Saxons (what, no Celts?) and Gallipoli …
Still, it could be worse on a Friday … the pond might have been dealt an American hand, in a pack stacked with Jokers and Zombies…
Odd trivia - my source tells me that the item in the flagship, originally headed ‘Coronavirus: Return to sender-economists’ letter is gibberish.’ has gained an author overnight. Initially only the Henry sought credit for strafing the rest of the profession, but the source tells me that the name of Jonathan Pincus has been added to that column. As far as she is prepared to check (life is too short, etc.) the extra name did not bring any extra comment, or otherwise better explain what the Henry thought he was on about.
ReplyDeletePincus is well-respected within the professional body, the Economic Society of Australia, and currently lists as a visiting professor at Adelaide University.
Perhaps this is just the Henry whistling up someone to stand by him, in case the erstwhile colleagues take umbrage at, well - ‘gibberish’?.
Ergas and Pincus were joint authors of the chapter ‘Infrastructure and colonial socialism’ in the ‘Cambridge Economic History of Australia’, although the Henry has turned 180 degrees from much of what he apparently approved of, those 7 years ago.
Presumably the extra ‘author’ will have appeared only in the electronic version - well may we say, to what purpose?
Other Anonymous
Following on from yesterday's comments I came across this piece where John Quiggin schools the Pond's favourite death cultist on statistics. It carries the disclaimer "I am over 60, and ill-disposed towards people who think my life is expendable."
Deletehttps://johnquiggin.com/2020/04/23/pedestrians-and-pandemics/
It made me think about how much time is wasted on debunking rubbish that looked like rubbish in the first place. Killer Creighton is just another hack but you have pointed out that many others may have had some street cred at some time in their lives and are still willing to pop up and do Murdoch's bidding.
Is it really that lucrative or do they just need the attention?
When you've been The Muncher's valued economics advisor, well, what is there left in life to do ?
DeleteI womder just who he really advised: Abbott or Credless ?
Just further to giving dumb people some credibility by trying to untangle their ramblings, consider the absolute industry devoted to unpicking Trump's demented gibberish. Did he see something on Fox news? Has he heard this from someone and just totally misunderstood? Is he just making this up?
Deletehttps://www.vox.com/2020/4/23/21233628/trump-disinfectant-injections-sunlight-coronavirus-briefing
“Supposing we hit the body with a tremendous, whether it’s ultraviolet or just very powerful light ... and then I said supposing you brought the light inside the body, which you can do either through the skin or in some other way. And I think you said you’re gonna test that,” Trump said, addressing Bryan. “And then I see disinfectant, where it knocks it [coronavirus] out in a minute — one minute — and is there a way we can do something like that by injection inside, or almost a cleaning. Because you see it gets in the lungs and it does a tremendous number on the lungs, so it’d be interesting to check that. So, that you’re going to have to use medical doctors with, but it sounds interesting to me.”
Saw this Bef. Beyond the twilight zone shit.....there are no words! Injecting disinfectant! Flailing so bigly...
DeleteI suspect the sacking of Dr. Bright was imperative as President Space Cadet had also got the word about Pete Evans amazing Covid light machine.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/apr/22/rick-bright-trump-hydroxychloroquine-coronavirus?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other
Cheery Anon.
After all this tine, is anybody even mildly surprised or amused by Trumpy's ignorant stupidity ? We really do have to just accept that the US Prez is a raving lunatic.
DeleteBTW CA, something I'd mostly forgotten about from my Inkerman St days: that was the first and only place I ever got to buy and consume a bottle of Chateau D’Yquem sauternes. It cost nearly $100 back then (hence my once only :-( ) but a 750 ml bottle of the 2009 vintage now costs $1055 at Wine Square.
That's not trivia, OA, that's Ergas gold at the bottom of the garden. And Quiggin is always fun to read, a good link, and there's only one answer, petulant Peta, and as for Dr. Donald, the reason the pond usually keeps him to cartoons is because the shill con artist snake oil salesman narcissist bankrupt is a danger to public health
DeleteBefuddled - re. your 11:43 AM contribution. We know, from that inadvertent disclosure, that one of the Dames was ringing up the best part of a grand each time the sun rose, which invites recollection of an incident in my paid working life.
DeleteAn outside hotshot investigator, who thought he had the scent of criminal conspiracy within the organisation, said to me 'Well, I don't know about you, but I do know that I could never be bribed.' My reply was 'All you know is that nobody has offered you something that you wanted badly enough.'
I should have known better - that set him off on several new trails, such that his investigation was never completed - for a bad outcome all around.
The real point was - it is not easy to divine just what inducement will get a person just to reshape their 'opinions' to suit those of the paymaster. And that does not carry any criminal sanction.
I think you have identified one kind of possibility - having one's name at the head of an article would work for many; it is the motivator for lots of 'Letters to the Editor'.
Or there is just Humbert Wolfe's immortal -
You cannot hope
to bribe or twist,
thank God! the
British journalist.
But, seeing what
the man will do
unbribed, there's
no occasion to
Other Anonymous
I think much the same has been said about British justices, too, OA. Very elegantly put, though.
Delete"Whenever the pond has been persuaded to play 500 - rarely "
ReplyDeleteAuction solo is the game, DP, not simple 500. Oh, the joys of "prop and cop".
From the Muncher: "In a world where economic life is harder, issues such as climate change and identity politics will probably become less important."
Oh such are the dreams of the everyday Muncher ... And what else could be said about his doozy little daydream of the eternal victory of "centre right" identity politics ? ....
We still have that old romantic Holely Henry though: "In short, a new, entirely democratic society had arrived, combining a deep-seated belief in the glory of the "Anglo-Saxon race" ..."
But, butt Henry, Gladys Berejiklian isn't an "Anglo-Saxon", and her ancestors never owed anything to Queen Vic. So what does the Powerhouse mean to her ?
Then he says: "And ignoring Edmund Burke's warning that those who do not look back to their ancestry will not look forward to their posterity ..."
Oh Henry, hasn't anybody ever told you to put the past behind you ? To go forward to a glorious future and don't look back ? And who believes a word that an old reactionary like Edmund Burke ever said ?
Basically though, I do wonder just how long some of these old fuddy-duddies like Our Henry think the past lasts. Do we "Anglo-Saxons" still have museums to glorify Alfred the Great ? How many Australian residents - including the Anglo-Saxons - have ever even heard of him. And who cares ?
I don't know about Alfred the Great but I have heard of Alfred the Not So Great and Alfred the UnRemarkable.
DeleteNow that sounds very Molesworthian, JC, whereas I tend to be a bit Fotherington-Thomasy myself.
DeleteGB, Read a few reviews on vintage and current Chateau D’Yquem sauternes and must admit a couple almost had me dribbling.....opulence, through the roof,.... a veritable thesaurus of superb. I imagine a lazy hundred must have seemed like a divine bargain after emptying the bottle. :)
DeleteA recent tale from the rubbish caper, if I may indulge upon you.
About 8 years ago a life long friend, also in the rubbish removal caper, was engaged to remove a load of trash from a house in Toorak by a woman following an apparently acrimonious divorce. One of the items to be specifically removed from the garage was about a dozen cases of 1970’s vintage wine from the Pauillac and St.Emillion region, plus a few loose bottles as well. Being challenged by even a mobile phone, he asked me to research and find the best place to sell them. A gave him a ball park figure and the names to a couple of auction houses, to which he took the wine.
The good part was that he got about $31,000 from memory, quite a bit above my estimate. plus the $400 for the job.
The bad part was that his elder brother, a lifelong junkie, sadly, got wind of the sale and collared the cheque with a bit of fast talking and used a large portion of the money to pay his kids school fees. There’s always one in every family. :(
Cheery Anon.
The $100 wasn't exactly "lazy", but yes the Chateau D'Yquem has a certain deserved standing amongst the drinkable grape juices. Though these days I tend to settle for a much cheaper tokay - admittedly a 5 puttonyos tokaji aszu ($50 from Dan Murphy) but it just hasn't quite been the same since the old Hungarian communist regime got replaced by the "free" market.
DeleteSounds like that divorced woman just wanted to make sure her ex didn't get that wine. Pity one can't divorce brothers though.
Went to a recent article at tastehungary.com with a great article on the history and methods of this wine of Popes and Kings, including the arrival of the free market. Very informative read actually. Thanks. Impressed that Peter the Great ordered 600 barrels a year. :) Cheery Anon.
DeleteOf course I still like port (ruby or oxidised aka tawny) and muscatel (young or aged) too. And of course muscatels are the second nicest eating grapes - after currant grapes (ie before they are dried). But now currants are almost unavailable and white muscatels have completely disappeared. Such is life.
DeleteHi DP. I agree with your hatred of misere. My darling wife plays misere about every third hand and always thrashes me. Who invented this bizarre ruling?
ReplyDeleteMisere, and occasionally open misere, is the ruination of 500. But there has to be four to play auction solo. :-(
Delete