In which the pond wakes up on a Monday with a bad hangover and an onion munching drunk for company ...

For a minute there, the pond thought Brook might have been brooking no nonsense from Rachael Kohn, long a home for loonies, or the newer home, God Forbid, but it was just a news report gimmick that had disappeared into the digital ether.

Disappointing, sad, but in any case, the pond can go one better than Brook, and that's the reptile tendency to print the views of a notorious drunk, and better still, have that notorious drunk talk about the demon booze and the way he knows what's best for others ...

Oh sure there was one reptile sally by an Akker Dakker ...

But for the rest it was pure EXCLUSIVE ...

Once past the heroic photo of the notorious drunk trying to look like a statesman, there wasn't much to the EXCLUSIVE ...

It turned out to be a most modest contribution by the notorious onion munching drunk ...

So conservative values involve getting as pissed as a parrot and missing a vote?

Who knew? As for the rest, it was just more of the usual nonsense ...

But just to double down and make sure that the world paid attention, the reptiles decided to put the thoughts of an elected representative behind a paywall ...

Anyone who splashed out the cash to read the views of a notorious onion munching drunk wouldn't have been surprised by the epic hypocrisy, because it was all about how the notorious drunk knew the best way to handle the demon booze ...

Here's the thing. Every word the pond read seemed drenched in onion-munching hypocrisy and the images that the pond had assembled in its photo-montage of the notorious drunk only a few days ago, here, came back to haunt the pond ...

Not one word about the need for a booze bus 24 hours a day outside parliament house, and random drug testing in the corridors of power, nor even the need for the rigorous scrutiny of parliamentary allowances to ensure that notorious drunks like the onion muncher can't get their hands on booze, because if they get on the piss, one thing's certain, they'll miss a vote, and then turn up later, a little ginger and dusty, to lecture everyone else on the dangers of the demon drink ...

To be fair, as a notorious pisspot, the onion muncher probably speaks from personal experience of the dangers of too much tippling, but how pathetic it is to think that this wretch remains in a position to lecture others about excessive drinking? 

The pond doesn't blame the Liberal party so much - the rest of them are inclined to be a bunch of tipplers in love with the demon drink, with the luxurious creak of leather chairs suggesting that they're better than the common herd - but what were the reptiles thinking, to so encourage an onion munching drunk and thereby reveal his rich hypocrisy, when he might be better off writing testimonials for AA ...

Rowe caught something of the whiff of absurdity and hypocrisy surrounding the current government, with more high-stepping Rowe here ...