In which the pond does its best to help the Terror business model ...

Each time the pond drops in on the Terrorists, it keeps on getting begging notes suggesting the Terror is desperate for help ...

It's strange, because the Terror's business model seems to be firing on all three cylinders. Look at its front page ...

Model madness and life for NRL creeps, as the Terror celebrates the way its chosen boofhead thugby league cult is full of weirdos with attitude problems ... why it's as if too many models have gone to their heads with no necks ...

And moving beyond the news, the opinion page seems to be firing on all two cylinders ...

Of course there's a theoretical issue ... "all the news half the price" suggests an attempt to monetize the news, when in fact these days, there's so much of it, all over the place, it's impossible to give it away ...

But who can complain about the depth and authority of the opinionistas led as burley to get the fish excited and biting?

Now there might be technical arguments. Shouldn't Akker Dakker be the early morning lead? Must it always be the Devine and petulant Peta?

Even worse, when it came to petulant Peta, the pond knew the answer straightaway.

The problem with our PM?

Malware had a problem when he was the Liberal leader last time, and he's still got it now?

Easy peasy ...here's the problem ...

Oh dear, and the pond would have been pleased if it had been revealed he was a Pom and he'd still been allowed to keep his seat - we are after all, all subjects of our glorious Queen, Kiwis and Canucks, included along with the Poms - but it seems these days he's desperate to prove he's an Australian ...

What's that you say? The rampaging onion muncher isn't what petulant Peta is banging on about at tedious length?

Oh sheesh, they're not still banging on about a few words spoken by Malware in Pommy land? They're not still invoking Cory?

By golly, the festering hate runs deep, and like a Collins class sub, never runs silent ...

It doesn't seem to ever get old, this routine ... no matter how many times comrade Bill hovers into view, no matter how often the old joke is recycled ...

The visceral fear and loathing that petulant Peta and her mob show for Malware makes the pond's contempt for his NBN seem like amateur, effete posing ...

They're still wheeling out memories of Ming the Merciless?

Sure, it takes exceptional hubris and cheek for a proven failure, the cyclone at the heart of one of Australia's worst prime ministerships, to reprimand Malware, but the pond loves it, loves the weekly ritual of the Malware piñata bashing ...

If you're a dedicated secularist, it replaces the weekly trip to the mass to chant "domine onioni munchus qui dixisti apostolis tuis: pacem relinquo vobis, pacem mean do vobis: ne respicias peccata mea, sed fidem partius Liberalis, pacificare et coanduare digneris..."

Or some such thing ... put it another way ... 

And so to the next round of Malware piñata bashing ... the most excellent business model the pond can possibly imagine for the Terrorists, and this time it comes courtesy of Akker Dakker ...

Now some might recall that it was the onion muncher who began the right royal mess of the latest submarine deal, roaming off to consort with the Japanese and generally alarming everyone interested in boondoggling and the fate of the poodle ...

But why worry about ancient history when Akker Dakker can be sent in to grab Malware by the ankle and give him a good savaging?

Now the Donald might love a French military parade, but it leaves Akker Dakker cold, and worse, in something of a Scandinavian Ikea funk ...

Oh such a pretty Ikea set of motifs, whales and subs, though the pond was torn and wondered if it shouldn't have worked the Beatles' yellow sub into the mix ...

Don't get the pond wrong. The pond loves it when Akker Dakker takes down the poodle and Malware and subs, and welders, especially croweater welders, who can't do it as well as Akker Dakker does ...

And what's the bet that in the next gobbet the noble onion muncher scores a mention?

Yes, the onion muncher did so well when petulant Peta and his valiant crew were at the helm ... and he's still coming up with realistic solutions of a nuke 'em all kind ...

Every so often the pond wonders why the country ended up with the current copper driven intertubes, and epic fails like the Collins class sub ...

It probably starts with cackling geese like Akker Dakker, wanting to mock Malware but not having a clue.

The Wirraway began life as a training and general purpose military aircraft. It was only when the shit hit the fan that it was turned into a light bomber with ground attack capacity, and sent up against vastly superior Japanese fighter aircraft ...and some boffin had the bright idea of trying to use a training aircraft as a model for a fighter variant, that epic failure the Boomerang ...

It routinely irritates the pond the way the reptiles muck up history, though Akker Dakker could easily have Greg Hunted a more astute form of operational snidery at the Wirraway wiki here ...

Akker Dakker might have written something like ...

Comparisons have been made with the shocking Collins-class project but an even better comparison is with the Wirraway, Australia's trainer aircraft, pressed into fighter combat service in World War II, sitting ducks for actual Japanese fighters, in much the same way as Malware and me, Akker Dakker, glorious funkster of web failure, thinks copper is some sort of substitute for optic fibre ...

Nobody had the first clue an actual fighter might have come in handy, as opposed to a trainer - Singapore, the British empire, wot wot - which is why Ming the Merciless was busy showing how to arrange Australia's defence, by attacking unionists and shipping pig iron to Japan.

Oh it's of a piece, this glorious history ...

But the pond is grateful to the Terror - what a business plan they have - and to petulant Peta and to ranting Wirraway Akker Dakker ... and to Moir for pointing out the way that the entire mob seem intent on glorious self-destruction ... (with more Moir here).