In which the Caterists help the pond wash a little whiter ...

The theme today is whiteness ...

The pond recalls its mother sweating over a hot copper tub, struggling to achieve whiteness ... 

Yes, in those days, the water was boiled, a ringer was rung and perversely, getting to a proper state of whiteness was considered best done with a bag of blue ...

Ever since, the pond confesses it's had a lack of interest in white - in fact, a man dressed in a white shirt, with a bright tie, can be as unnerving to the pond as having a couple of Mormon missionaries arrive at the front door looking young and crisp and clean and freshly pressed ...

Now it's not as if there aren't any other possible themes for the day.

Malware put the cat amongst the reptiles by making a bold claim, and naturally the Terrorists were astonished by his boldness, the cheeky thing ...

The lizards of Oz also thought it a "bold claim", the saucy devil ...

But whiteness was the big theme, thanks to the taxi-driver arm breaker, though the Terrorists also sought to praise Ivanka for her splendid missionary work helping Chinese workers out of poverty by working in wretched conditions for three fifths of fuck all bar the greater glory of the Trump name ...

Of course there's something profoundly funny about a bigoted white Australian male living handsomely on his parliamentary pension scribbling that the idea of Mark Latham is a lie, but the pond wasn't interested in standard reflexive post-modernist irony, it was after its Caterist fix, and thank the long absent lord, the Caterist was also banging on about the theme of the day ...

Now this is startling stuff, because the pond was reared on the notion of whiteness ...

Luckily the Caterist google splash clarified the Caterist theme ... it wasn't just ordinary whiteness but something that wicked Tim Soutawogawhatt'shisnameasane had come up with that had inflamed the Caterist so ...

Still the pond was finding it hard to shake all the folk memories to be found on the full to overflowing intertubes celebrating whiteness ...

But in the end nostalgia had to give way to the hard-hitting Caterist giving that Tim a spot of what for...

Indeed, indeed, and it could all be sorted much more easily, if everyone just followed the Caterist lead, fronted up to the Department of Finance and scored some handsome taxpayer cash in the paw ...

No need for any racial profiling there, though it might help if you're a squawking, squealing Pom ready to tug the forelock and do your best to keep everyone else out of the kingdom of government assistance ...

Phew, the pond is always glad when it get its homage to the Caterist taxpayer cash in the paw skills out of the way early, so that the rest of the Caterist indignation can be swilled down like a pig at trough ...

Indeed, indeed. Who'd have thought that a man who routinely mentions Bob Menzies' name sounds like he might find comradeship and affinity with the persecution of gays in Chechnya ...you inow, them funny folk reeking of sinister avant-garde sexuality ...

Okay, it's a little pivot, but it wasn't so long ago in Australia that the humiliation and persecution of gays was as common as the bizarre obsession with whiteness in washing, and the bigotry on display in the latest Caterist rant provides a nice cue to throw to a recent story by Masha Gessen in The New Yorker, luckily outside the paywall, The Gay men Who Fled Chechnya.

There was the usual nonsense about there being no gays in Chechnya, and tales of vicious bigotry and torture and the persecution, and then a poignant ending ...

It reminded the pond of exactly why it disliked Putin's Russia - before even the need to mention the killing of journalists and other assorted crimes - and it also reminded the pond just why it routinely thought of the Caterist as a rather thick and selfish and plump and self-satisfied goose ...

And stupid, insanely, criminally stupid, somehow imagining that the diversity of human sexuality started with 19th century European artists.

How fuckwitted can a Caterist be? Might the pond commend a tour of ancient literature and Pompeii?

Now the pond's day will be complete if this handsomely paid prat with his nonsense in the lizard Oz and his head in the taxpayer grant trough will kindly mention "elites" as an object of disdain and derision ...

Um, shouldn't that be, makes the country harder for the whiter than white right-thinking federal government to hand out grants to the important figures who count ...

Oh wait, the pond's already done that riff once today, when it should be focused on getting things whiter than white ...

And now, cleansed of its thought crimes, the pond can attend to the latest Rowe, offering a very spivvy set ofMatryoshka nesting dolls ... with more Rowe here ...

Oh heck, there's just time to peg one last load of washing out on the line in the bright cleansing Tamworth sun ...