In which the pond goes Commonweal Vice Regal and thanks to the bromancer, discovers Europe is in ruins ...

Amazing that they were still doing "Vice Regal" in Fairfax in 1990, in the days of the drover's dog, and yet the pond has the feeling that those days are returning …

Everyone is now back from the Commonwealth gig, but the reptiles keep anxiously printing news of Prince Chuck, and somehow imagine this will set their social media followers on fire …

With Brexit looming, the anxious Poms have rediscovered the Commonwealth, and the local reptiles keep faithfully reporting the latest updates from The Times, as in "53 world leaders bowed to the inevitable", and the pond is humbled by the majestic progress of the empire revived ...

Sheesh, Boris to save the day, and bring Zimbabwe back into the fold, and that'll learn the EU mob a thing or two … or is it just a chance to recycle some quaint old family snaps?

How could we let the Royals go, with their snaps and their traditions? And so busy, doing such important work.

Ah yes, is there no end to it, the making of an opening speech at the meeting, and the hosting of a dinner at the summit, and then there's the issuing an annual message and the heading off to church … by golly, that would be worth a line or two in the drover's dog's diary jottings of vice regal doings ...

Uh huh, well Mugabe has his own problems with his looting ways, as reported by the BBC here, but how about the thoughts of Andrew Meldrum, kicked out of the country in 2003 and interviewed by npr here about the new regime:

"Mnangagwa worked for more than 40 years as Robert Mugabe's right-hand man and he said he learned a great deal from him," the author and journalist explains. "And also he was known as Mugabe's 'enforcer.' In the guerrilla war against Rhodesian rule, Emmerson Mnangagwa was his personal assistant and his bodyguard." 

He later became Mugabe's spymaster, as minister of security then later as head of the Central Intelligence Agency. Faul (journalist Michelle Faul) recalled the reputation for repression that Mnangagwa acquired post-independence, in the 1980s. 

"Oh, I think Mnangagwa certainly causes more terror in Zimbabwe than Mugabe," she said. "He is the man that is considered the orchestrator of the killings we call Gukurahundi, of the minority Ndebele people. Mnangagwa went on to become head of the CIO — the Central Intelligence Organization — another much feared agency in Zimbabwe known for disappearing people, picking up people, torturing them. You might live, you might never be seen again. ...I'm Zimbabwean... And we are celebrating, but we need to be cautious. This is not a revolution to bring reform."

Good luck with all of that, but it's a measure of how desperate the post-Brexit May government is that they're now roaming the world trying to deal with all sorts, while the reptiles of Oz faithfully reprint stories of the Commonwealth revitalised by many famous world leaders, humbly acknowledging the glorious leadership of Prince Chuck ...

How pleased the onion muncher must be to see his vision affirmed, though there is that unfortunate matter of Chuck's greenie activist ways …

And so to the bad news, which is to say the good news, which is to say that Europe is stuffed, Italy is ruined, the Euro is Satan's weapon of mass destruction, and how wise and lucky it is that Britain abandoned this devil's work, and began to explore the Commonwealth, and possibly the return of a revitalised Zimbabwe…and how the poor Europeans must wish they all lived in Australia.

Yes, the bromancer is on yet another junket, and brings news to gladden the hearts of loyal colonials ...

Hmm, this is going to be a long one, you can't trash Europe in a couple of hundred words, so the pond laid in a few irrelevant cartoons featuring the United States going strong ...

The pond was astonished to discover that Italy is in something of a political and economic crisis, having imagined that things had been moving along spiffingly in Italy these past few decades …

This dark side seems to suggest that it's way past time for an Italianaexit ...

Indeed, indeed. It's a disaster. Put up a wall, lock it down, shut it off, and all will be well.

Time for a breather ...

And now on with the disaster. 

How wise were the British to leave, how unsavoury is the European situation, with their idle chatter about coffee and acqua minerale, as if those are any guide to pleasure in life … and what's the cause of all the ruination? 

Must the bromancer and the pond remind you that it's the Satanic work of the devil, in the shape of the fiendish Euro and those wretches in Brussells ...

Damn you Germans, two world wars, and still you keep on ruining Europe …

Luckily not all is bad news. 

Italy, like many other noble imperial powers, resolutely refused to move beyond its borders, and so had nothing to do with Libya, Ethiopia, Eritrea and Somalia, and Africa Orientale Italiana was a model of discretion, ensuring that there'd be no more troubles in those troubled lands …

The pond has absolutely no idea why anyone in Africa would know anything about Italy … and the same goes, it must be said, for Italy when talking of Africa ...

Add caption

Phew, this is hard work, time for another breather …instead of adding a caption, how about the pond adds another cartoon?

And so to a final gobbet ...

And so the pond learned much this Sunday. 

Europe in ruins, the diabolical Euro the fault of it all, and how lucky to have Prince Chuck at the head of the Commonwealth, with the British wise to exit and embrace Zimbabwe and bring it back in to the fold, and ensure a glorious future away from the deviants trapped in Brussells …o

Oh and the planet's also in the best shape possible, thanks to Scottie …