In which the dog botherer joins Capt'n Flint me hearties … and raises a pirate flag ...

The pond realises that today there are many matters of great moment on the go, but the dog botherer went there yesterday, as the pond had hoped and expected, and so attention had to be paid, including that delightfully homophobic response by one Joseph McDremott, and Bronson calling the dog botherer an absolute tosser …though it added to the pond worry that the intertubes is far too full of understatement ...

The pond has many arguments with the lesser half about who is the dumbest - the dog botherer or the Caterist - and was mutually agreed that whichever was the last piece that was published would be the dumbest …

Was it just a coincidence that the reptiles published a snap of soldiers marching where there's nary a bit of dog botherer-preferred iconography on display?

Of course the pond grew up in the time of the Vietnam war where the behaviour, conduct and dress sense of American soldiers was celebrated in shows such as Apocalypse Now as a sure sign of why the disaffected grunts were going to lose the fight … but fancy the Donald not wanting to join in …

And then the sublimely stupid dog botherer decides to jump the shark … by citing "Ned" Kelly and Monash …

Monash might have valued the larrikin spirit, and not been up himself like a British commander, but to drag him into the discussion shows a complete absence of understanding of how Monash conducted himself, and expected the people under his command to behave …

And just to confirm that the dog botherer is a chicken hawk dumb bunny, what's this about "the freedom and encouragement to fight for their values"?

Aren't they supposed to be fighting for the aims of a designated mission? Does "their values" encompass looking and sounding like bikies or pirates on the seven seas?

The dog botherer's short piece was so inane that it actually provoked a little consternation amongst twitterers …

To which the dog botherer replied …

And why did the pond find that so funny?

Well, the very same day, this stern warning came down from on high …

Indeed, indeed. Looking for high standards of professional behaviour on the lizard Oz?

Take your pick, but remember to include the dog botherer celebrating piracy on the high seas …

Ah, was it only a few days ago, Jim lad, that the pond predicted that there'd be some News Corp clown who'd join the pirates …

But in the rubble of dog botherer stupidity, there was one tweet that referenced a Mitchell and Webb sketch, giving the pond a rare chance to give its favourite comic pair a go …

Join with the dog botherer in saying … the Nazis always had the best clobber … why skulls? Because skulls are good …death, cannibals, beheadings, pirates are fun ...