In which the pond at last enjoys a truly meditative Sunday ...

Dammit, why should the pond allow the reptiles and prattling Polonius to ruin the pond's meditative weekend...

The pond has been collecting items ever since it spotted the angry Sydney Anglicans getting into trouble with the Terror editorialist …

It is of course behind the paywall, but the Daily British Snail, a digital rag the pond only frequents because it knows it irritates the Terrorist paywallists no end, had the full yarn, acknowledging the Terror while busting the paywall …

Primary school scripture classes teach children as young as six to mime being choked in what a church group describes as 'age-appropriate play-acting'. Sydney Anglican Church Youthworks teaches Kindergarten and Grade 1 children to mime choking themselves to understand the consequences if they turn away from God. The teaching was modelled from Bible chapter Luke 8:4-15 which says: '[people who do not listen to God] are choked by the cares and riches and pleasures of life'. The bible scripture goes on to say 'A sower went out to sow his seed…. Some fell among thorns and the thorns grew up with it and choked it'. 
Youthworks CEO Craig Roberts told The Daily Telegraph the lesson 'incorporates supervised, age-appropriate play-acting as a teaching tool where students mime the response of the plants'. Mr Roberts said the teaching was expected when parents enrolled their children in Christian schools.

It was nice of the Snailers to put in a link to the Terror, but of course it falls on the barren seed of the paywall …but it got the pond humming, choke me in the shallow waters, before I get too deep, philosophy is the talk on a cereal box, religion is the smile on a complimentary woman …

How pleasing to see that the Sydney Anglicans are preparing children children for a lifetime of pleasure via erotic asphyxiation (though strangulation doesn't always work out terribly well, as some famous rock examples suggest).

Around the same time, the reptiles were diligently reporting the thoughts of the Fisher of men (complimentary women, please use the second entrance) …

The pond only mentions it because there's a reference to the confessional, the thing that got prattling Polonius all hot and bothered earlier in the day as he attempted to ruin the pond's weekend ...

Gee, someone better bring the Fisher of men up to speed on Polonius's wise theological interpretation of the sacrament.

As the official Catholic Boys' Daily, the reptiles are extremely keen on theology, so naturally they were disturbed by the Pope's failure to understand fundamentalist Catholic fundamentalism, even if they had to borrow from their brethren in The Economist …

Of course everybody knows what hell looks like …

… but the pond felt compelled to read on ...

Thanks Jack, glad that's sorted.

All this was well and good and an important theological clarification for the reptiles - now they know where they're heading for their crimes against humanity and the planet - but the piece de resistance was a piece proving that the reptiles would give space to all sorts of odd bods …

Of course this came at a time when the pond was in the heartland of traditional Australian family values … and relishing the joy at the notion of being transferred to Armidale in mid-winter … to live free of charge in a mate's bungalow ...

Of course none of this needs to be mentioned while the reptiles are busy pumping up the volume for the ACL … on the basis that evangelical fundamentalism is almost as close to the She God as Catholic fundamentalism ...

Indeed, indeed, the mood is right and the grassroots movement has thrown up some tremendous candidates elsewhere, and though they need a mulligans every so often, what a tremendous advertisement for evangelicals they make …

And so back to the redemption, and the business of the spreading of the hate ...

Long may the hate continue, though the pond had the misconception that somewhere Jesus mentioned something about love.

Perhaps it's time for a refresher course in the bible … but alas the reptiles picked the brains of their close-kissing Pom cousins to deliver more  bad news for the persecuted. Sheesh, it's not just white farmers, it's Xians in China ...

Those damnably clever, fiendishly difficult, climate science hoaxing Chinese are at it again, even though there's more Xians in China than the filthy commie swine.

But the pond has a fair idea where these deviant commies picked up the idea from … the bloody Catholics ...

And there was this at Huff Post, with active links, here ...

Clearly the Chinese government is deeply Catholic, and the pond thought this would have immensely pleased the grumpy reptiles, but no, they were determined to be unhappy ...

Well that's more than enough for a meditative Sunday.

Roll on Monday, and what joy to see that already the Fairfax polling is heralding the resurrection of Malware … surely the reptiles can manage the dead heat that Katharine Murphy was proposing on The Insiders this very morning?

Meanwhile, what a relief it is to end with a few New Yorker cartoons rather than the usual dose of the Donald …