Wednesday, April 04, 2018

In which the reptiles turn nationalist and possibly Venezuelan or at least baseload dinosaur ...

The reptiles' devotion to dinkum clean Oz coal, oi, oi, oi, has got themselves into a classic bind in the past few days …

They've lathered themselves up into a frenzy about the way the government must build new coal stations by Xmas, and now they have a genuine militarist cabal in play, an authentic conspiracy with a Venezuelan tinge, and agrarian socialism is again on the move … and poor old nattering "Ned" has been forced to deal with the fall-out ...

How Ben Chifley must be dancing in heaven. Victory at last …and the reptiles have selected the very latest free enterprise model to drive ...

Week after week, the lizards of Oz have made coal the issue … and now poor old "Ned" has to clean up the mess ...

And lurking behind it all? No, it isn't actual climate science, it all has to do with a climate change debate, and the important thing is to forget the science and win the debate ...

The pond has the notion that poor old "Ned" was trying to say this …

Fiddlesticks. There's at least one store in south King that will still process film, and even keeps some in the fridge … who dares to say film cameras are dead?

At which point, it only seems fair to wheel in Dame Groan, nationaliser devotee, agrarian socialist extraordinaire, and antique camera lover ...

And don't forget that the onion muncher must displace Malware … the Monash Forum have worked that out too … so that a new luddite era might begin ...

Who knew that Dame Groan was your classic Chifley enthusiast? What next? Nationalise the banks, the pond says, confident that Dame Groan will heed the call …

But where is all this coming from? Well naturally there was the most agrarian socialist of all in the mix … good old Barners

The pond had wondered how long it would take for Barners to join the onion muncher in destabilising Malware … and the answer was not long at all, especially as the reptiles have been playing a sterling part … 

And so to the denials that it's got nothing to do with giving Malware a hard time … it's just a vigorous debate on the need to forget all the jibber jabber about markets and get on with the nationalising ...

In all their stories, the reptiles have been very keen to put on display two pages of the militaristic Monash agenda … 

The pond is just happy to note the existence of the military conspiracy, shades of that great military hero Captain Francis de Groot slashing the ribbon before the dreadful socialistic Jack Lang could cut it … except now the military conspiracy wants to nationalise the energy industry and in particular coal-fired power stations in a way that would make that dreadful socialistic Jack Lang clap hands with joy… give the banks a hard time, the pond says!

Is it any wonder the pond's brain hurts?

Well the pond has reams more of this tangle of knots and fools, lying to themselves while they also lie to the country, but while much has had to hit the cutting room floor, it would be remiss if at least the pond didn't run with the reptile feature of the day …

Uh huh …a secret plan that's about as secret as the front page of the lizard Oz…or as secret as dangling on a spit over a hot military conspiracy fire ...

Around this point the pond felt in desperate need of a cartoon, and luckily there was a Rowe to hand, with more Rowe always to hand here

Phew, that felt better, and now before the pond can lurch towards a Pope cartoon, it's time for a little due diligence on this story … provided it all makes commercial sense, and the government is willing to help out, as any decent privatiser of profits and socialiser of losses has the right to expect ...

Indeed, it's all go, if they're able, which is to say if Malware and Josh are able to help out, and if they can, why then everything should be spiffing, and if not, why the onion muncher can replace Malware and Barners can return to his throne, and the country will be made safe one way or another ...

Phew, made it to the Pope cartoon. 

The pond admits to having nodded off a time or two - how hard is it to get the government to nationalise things and socialise the benefits of coal so that the reptiles might enter the future redeemed? What on earth could go wrong with a Venezuelan approach to things? Will Dame Slap scribble another furious story about the Greece of the South Pacific?

Never mind, the real point is the military conspiracy, and what joy it is to see the Pope so concerned about baseload dinosaurs … (and more baseload Pope here in a new grid shape)


  1. Pope is a genius at being able to draw a dinosaur that has all the characteristics of Abbott

    1. Hi WW,

      Pope is indeed a brilliant caricaturist but in the case of Abbott he is doubly blessed with a subject that is reptilian at the best of times, even down to the darting tongue.

      For awhile I believed the media were intentionally selecting the most creepy Abbott images but actual footage has proved me wrong.


  2. I've always grasped that the observation "what I thrice repeat is true" applies in full force to reptiles and Right Wingnuts, but what I never really took on board is that just repeating it to themselves has the full effect. So, "hele, hele, hele, ..." Dame Groan says to herself, and pretty soon it sounds just like "heaven, heaven, heaven, ..."

    So very easy for reptiles to believe any absurdity that they want to (or are told to) ...

  3. Hi Dorothy,

    Wherever sedimentary rocks of around 65 million years old can be found there is a thin layer of clay containing microscopic glass and soot. Below this layer can be found the fossilised remains of dinosaurs. Above it there are no remains of dinosaurs and indeed that of many other species that became extinct at that time.

    This layer is known as the K-T or K-Pg boundary.–Paleogene_boundary

    It is one of several “filters” that life on earth has passed through.

    The Physicists Walter and Luis Alvarez discovered that the rare element Iridium was to be found in massively higher concentrations in this K-T boundary. As the small amount of Iridium on the earths surface is generally thought to be due to meteoritic impacts, the father and son’s conclusion, was that a massive asteroid, some 10km in diameter had impacted with the Earth and the effects of this collision had in turn exterminated the dinosaurs.

    At first palaeontologists were suspicious of a physicist’s explanation for the demise of the dinosaurs but when the Chicxulub crater under the Yucatan Peninsula of Mexico was recognised as a massive impact crater, Alvarez’s hypothesis was verified.

    However closer inspection of the fossil record found that certain dinosaur species were going extinct before the K-T boundary. The reason for this was believed to be due to the climate changing effects of the cause of the Deccan Traps. Massive volcanic activity in what is now the western-central part of India spewed up a 2,000m thick layer of basalt covering 500,000 square kilometres. That volcanic activity also released an enormous amount of sulphur dioxide which reduced the global temperature by more than 2’C. For organisms that cannot control their internal body temperature this was a critical problem for dinosaurs.

    The double whammy, is that recent research points to the Chicxulub Meteorite impact could well have triggered even more massive volcanic activity thus creating even more cooling and the eventual extinction of the cold blooded dinosaurs and the rise of the warm blooded mammals that grew into the ecological niches now left vacant.

    What this has to do with a blog about the Murdoch media and the reptiles that inhabit it, I have no idea. Except to wonder if the slow death of the tree killing print press will be dramatically enhanced by the massive impact of Asteroid Rupert’s death.

    A new boundary maybe?


    1. Ah, but apparently some warmer blooded (or at least better insulated) dinosaurs survived. They're now called birds.

      But the thing is that it's the bigger 'cold bloods' that survive better because their own massive body is their best insulator. And being cold-blooded they didn't need to have a high nutrient intake. Which is why those sauropsids took over from our ancestral synapsids back in the great Permian-Triassic Extinction.

      Oh the history of the Earth is such fun, yes ?

    2. We've already passed a new boundary, Diddy. The last 70 years has seen enough material deposited with distinct characteristics (radioactive material, metal particulates, plastics, faunal and floral turnover) that in 70 million years our successors will be able to distinguish us from our forebears. Some say the Holocene epoch is over, and referring to this age of wonders as the Anthropocene instead.

  4. Oh deary, deary me. The search is on for naming rights for The Misguided Olde Backbenchers as the Monash family have asked them to kindly disassociate themselves from John Monash's name forthwith.

    It's hard, very hard to see a family that would like their name associated with the Crusty Olde Curmudgeons isn't it?

    How about the Chris Mitchell Seven?

    It seems that the major has been ruffling feathers in another area of non-expertise in his portfolio:

    1. Hmm. "Chris Mitchell Seven" ? Now that tickled some otherwise comatose neurons down at the back end of my brain ... but all I could think of was 'The Dave Clark Five'.

      But anyway, it caused me to find an old, old favourite which I kinda think is somehow relevant (though the Mike Curb Congregation were sixteen, IIRC): the theme song from Kelly's Heroes:

      After that, for some totally incomprehensible reason, the youtube site automatically went on to play The Seekers 'I'll Never Find Another You':

      And if we're talking about Onion Munchers, I sincerely hope so.

  5. Are the Monash people high? How do they propose to fuel a HELE on the site of Hazelwood? Do the think its cheap to ship thousands of tons of coal a thousand kilometers? Or are they proposing to use local brown coal, in which case it will be neither HE or LE.

    And (for the last time I promise) coal-fired power is not fucking dispatchable! That's like saying Australia Post provide a way to contact people instantly. It's only true if you define "instantly" as "within 3 to 5 working days".

    1. Yair, but even with high quality anthracite instead of 'peatish' lignite, the HELEs aren't very HE nor LE - though the steam does opperate at a significantly higher temperature, apparently, than the non-HE plants. And functional 'HELE' plants are not cheap, which is why there isn't very many of them.

      But maybe it's cheaper to ship lots of coal to a power plant instead of lots of water - gotta cool that steam down again after it's been used.


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