Thursday, April 05, 2018

In which the reptiles keep news of the civil war flowing ...

Oops, sorry, where did that come from?

Distant memories of a sporting whiteboard and a war that never ends, a war longer than the hundred years war … 

Don't ask what the war is about … anything will do for a squabble.

It will be recalled that the cultish reptiles had lathered themselves up into a frenzy at the way that everything was going to fall apart this last summer thanks to the energy situation …but when you're in a cult, if the rapture didn't happen, never mind, it's sure to happen next week, and meanwhile, there are sensitivities to be trodden on …

Say what? It's changed from dinkum clean Oz coal, oi, oi, oi, to "coal power" - mighty morphin' coal power pollies…

Discourteous? Pardon the pond if it puts on its best Yosemite Sam southern gentleman voice. "I say suh, have you no decency, suh?"

Sorry Sam, they're dinosaurs, they must do what dinosaurs must do … and the biggest, toughest dinosaur of them all leads the way ...

He's going to cycle through the Latrobe Valley? Will he take in Morwell? Never mind, Scottie was in the thick of the war too ...

This is where the reptiles, with their lust for dinkum clean Oz coal oi, oi, oi, and their demands for coal power pollies, have finally arrived.

Poor old Scottie cornered and up the tree, a bit like the possum down the road the pond spotted last night (but at least he or she was waiting to swoop on the community garden) ...

But it didn't end there. Even the Canavan cock had to crow thrice …

And what did the careening Caravan have to say about the nattering "Ned" piece reported in the pond yesterday?

Uh huh. Why is the pond reminded of images of a dancing, swirling Bugs Bunny? So what sayeth the Cory ...

Oh that's harsh, that's damnably harsh, suggesting that the likes of the onion muncher are in bed with the socialistic, pinkly perverted watermelonish greenies … can't we at least agree that it's all AGL's fault for taking climate science and future trends seriously?

Well it wouldn't be a proper civil war without Barners making an appearance and the reptiles just had to catch up on his ABC turn, where it has to be said, Barners was looking more beefy and fleshy than ever ...

It was Ollie who was assigned the transcription duties … and what fine rhetorical form Barners was in ...

Around this point, the pond felt in urgent need of a reviving Rowe cartoon - Barners has an unnerving affect on the pond, all the more so as only a few days ago it was breathing the very same air in that lively town of Armidale …

Sheesh, no wonder the pond felt faint and in need of a refreshing Rowe - the clean coal just caresses your cheek with an unearthly glow - and happily there's more cleansing Rowe available here

Keep the rats warm Scottie! Do it for Malware, with his 30th birthday just around the corner …

And so to an analysis by Andrew, a Fairfaxian refugee who sets out all the tempting reasons to spend a squillion keeping the dream alive, so that in due course energy users still on the grid can pay a due and proper price ...

Say what?

A competitive threat to Telstra's ageing but hugely profitable copper network? Where the pond sits, Telstra's ageing copper network is the NBN… and it's a genuine competitive threat only if the competition is to see how many drop-outs can be produced in a day ...

Never mind, let Andy finish making his case for AGL to sell ...

Ah, so it's all to do with maximising the benefits to NSW customers …or is it just so the whole fuss will go away, and the civil war might come to a temporary end, as if that's remotely possible with the onion munching dinosaur on the prowl or on his bike ...

And so to the reptiles latest story this day, one that took up the bottom half of the front page of the tree killer edition, and was top of the digital edition ...

Say what? The onion muncher and Di Natale are as one? The greenies and the onion muncher are joined at the hip? They want to socialise the grid and keep them pesky furriners out?

Cory was right? Nattering "Ned" was right?

Is it any wonder the pond felt the need to join with Little Walter?

I don't care what you heard 
This is a crazy mixed up world 
Crazy mixed up world 
Crazy mixed up world 
Crazy mixed up world 
I'm in a crazy mixed up world 
When I loosen up down inside 
My feet begin to glide 
My heart goes pump, pump, pump 
That clean coal makes me jump, jump, jump 
I can't control myself no more
Clean coal got me on the floor 
Well, I'm crazy ain't you heard 
I'm in a crazy mixed up world

It's got so crazy the pond had to rely on the immortal Pope to bring word of the mutton Dutton's tremendous international diplomacy … with more Pope here ...


  1. So Tony is going on a bike ride through Gippsland at the expense of the Australian taxpayers. How come he is able to claim accommodation and meal allowances while he gallivants around with his extremist right wing mates.
    If he was to be so inclined to raise money for charity he should do this ride without subsidy from the taxpayers of Australia.

  2. Olivia Caisley's first article has been updated since Dorothy screen-grabbed it, the first para being replaced with:

    "Former deputy prime minister Tim Fischer has demanded MPs behind the ginger group the Monash Forum change its name by sunset Friday.

    Mr Fischer is chair of the Saluting Monash Council and has joined General Monash's great grandchildren in objecting to the use of his name."

    Oh noes! Deputy to the GPMSM* has turned into a tree-hugging 'leet! Won't anyone think of the lignite?

    BTW - Bloomberg showed at least five years ago that new wind power was already cheaper than new coal - unsubsidised, whole of life (construction + maintenance + decommissioning), unit of power delivered (not notional capacity). When you factor in the requirement to switch off a new plant after 15 years, the actual cost of new coal is at least double unsubsidised wind. Oh, and wind has become relatively cheaper, and coal relatively more expensive since. Gas was cheaper than either,
    and even with artificially created shortages, probably still is.

    *Greatest Prime Minister Since Menzies (TM)

    1. However, I don't think we'll ever see the delcoals (delusional coalists, thanks Miranda) acknowledge that wind is cheaper than coal (and solar is very close too), FD.

      And that's before we begin to take into account the impact of coal mining and burning on people's lives and health:

      We've largely gotten away without major impact in places like Victoria because the coal mining and burning was all conveniently hidden in the 'wonderful' Latrobe Valley and away from the major population centre(s). But just ask the Chinese how they feel these days - what colour is the sky, again ?

    2. Chinese skies may be brown, but the blue skies of the LaTrobe Valley are anything but clean, GB.

      When the suggestion was made that we should adopt US standards for mercury emissions, the coal generators whinged: “if Australia is forced to adopt US-based mercury emissions reduction technologies, new and existing coal-based plant would cease to be competitive”.

      Just another externality society carries for the leaners. Not a subsidy, though, heavens no.


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