In which the pond scores an early mark thanks to petulant Peta ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

What a relief to reach Thursday and realise that it's petulant Peta day at the lizard Oz, and so the pond can loaf off, have a little bludge, take an early mark ... (do vulgar youffs still know what an early mark is?)

 

Of course petulant Peta blathering on about SloMo rediscovering the steel is richly comic, and evokes fond memories of the days when she led the onion muncher by the balls with a stainless steel grip, but sadly the pond must maintain its ban ...

 

Meanwhile, the reptiles have settled a little in their war on the ABC, but the venerable Meade did an excellent report on the group think at work in the Chairman's empire ... 

 

 

 

 

45 articles in two days! Why, the pond had barely scratched the surface, and there were legal threats, and what do you know, it'll all crank up again next Monday ...

The pond particularly enjoyed this bit of the piece ...

“The response to Four Corners makes News Corp look worse than the program did,” Burrowes told Guardian Australia. “Which makes me think it wasn’t a coordinated attack but was based on instinct. Those who come up in the News Corp culture know who the natural enemy is and obviously the ABC is one. So when News Corp is attacked it’s very tribal and they all return fire.”
News Corp denies the coverage was coordinated.
“No, it is not fair to say that there has been a ‘coordinated campaign’ about the ABC’s 4 Corners program,” a News Corp Australia spokesman told Guardian Australia.
“What has happened is that the editors and journalists who watched the program chose to report and comment on its bias and obvious failings as a piece of serious journalism.”

Who knows who that spokesperson was, but they really deserve a pay raise. Keeping tongue in cheek while delivering porkies shows exceptional ability and should be rewarded... because it it wasn't a coordinated campaign then it shows a herd mind at work far worse than even the pond had imagined.

 

Of course the herd mind group think on view makes it hard for the reptiles to have a go at Xi, now doing a Mao in schools, or claim any distinction from the herd instincts of fundamentalist Islamics (not to mention fundamentalist Xians). But what the heck, no coordination, just an unthinking herd of lemmings heading towards the cliff, and mythological status ...

It wouldn't surprise the pond if the first early quislings of spring are ready to ditch gays, liberals, journalists, etc in Afghanistan, and what do you, there was Roger ready for the rogering, while our bouffant one was doing his duty by SloMo ...

 

 

But that was yesterday afternoon and the pond must move on ...

Oh sure there'll be the odd disturbing image ...

 

 

 

But think of the newspapers that will sell, and besides, Roger will talk to the Taliban and it will all be sorted ... there's nothing like a reptile to know how to talk to a fellow fundamentalist ...

And so to the good news,  and what do you know, dear sweet virginal clean Oz coal once again turned up at the top of the digital page ...

Warmest European summer on record? Don't you worry about any of that idle talk ...

The reptiles thought the dinkum clean virginal coal message was so important that it was top of the page in the tree killer edition too ...

 

 

Oh look, and they're happy to take Clive's money and promote the former furniture salesman ... yes, things are back to normal in reptile la la land ...

Below the fold things were also quiet ...

 

Out of that lot, there was only one name that stood out ... of course the pond was going to turn to Lloydie, saviour of the Amazon ...

 

 

 

 

For a moment, the pond was vaguely disturbed. It almost seemed like some kind of heresy was emanating from the saviour of the Amazon, but then the pond realised ... if not nuking the country, then what? 

 

Why surely we must grid and bear it, and give poor old long-suffering dinkum clean coal an even bigger subsidy ... (hint: coal is already tidily subsidised - try Australian fossil fuel subsidies hit $10.3 billion in 2020-21) ...

 

 

Oh steady on saviour of the Amazon, a few greenies might have been inflamed, much like an Australian summer, but the reptiles are ecstatic ... please, show some sensitivity, and whatever you do, don't allow a video to interrupt your scribbling with blather about Australia needing to move faster in renewables. Why next thing, the reptiles might even be accepting climate science, and then where would we be?

Yadda, yadda, but what's the real solution?

 

Of course, thanks echo chamber Geoff, why didn't the pond think of it. 

Forget the hottest European summer on record, forget all this idle reptile talk of wheeling out the nukes, embrace dear sweet clean innocent virginal coal, it's the only way forward. Show lashings of love - and for the one thing you love most dearly, is there anything more important than showering sweet coal with gifts? No, not diamonds, which have something of a family connection, but another $10 billion or so ...

Oh dear sweet lord, poor nukes ... the chance to leave the country mired in nuclear waste lost, perhaps for a generation ...

And now the pond must turn to the bromancer for its bonus, inspired by this brilliant co-joining yesterday ...

You see? There's the reptiles agitated and railing about anti-vaxxers - they did it again today - and never mind Faux Noise or Tucker or the rest of the Ivermectin, hydroxy crowd (if the furniture salesman's got the money from somewhere, why not run his ad?) - but look, right next to the anti-vaxxer talk, there's Dame Slap agitated and railing about lockdowns, because ... well because it's way past time to open up and get on with the killing fields ...

It's a difficult path for a bromancer to thread, and his solution is to open up, while pointing out in passing there will be a ... killing field ...

 

 

 

Dear sweet long absent lord, another meaningless image from Getty ... how the lizard Oz graphics department has descended into the pits ...

 

But back to the issue at hand ...

You see gold standard Gladys fucked up, and now has to talk about rainbows and hope, and freedumb just up the road, and meaningless stats of the 6 million jabs kind, and SloMo must support her ... and so we get a Wilcox cartoon just to get the bromancer ball rolling ...

 

 

And now on with the bromancer ...

By golly, the bromancer is verging dangerously towards heresy here ... surely it's time to launch the killing fields? Dame Slap has had enough of lockdowns, though it's hard to imagine that they made her more barking mad than in the days when she scribbled about the UN using climate science to introduce world government ...

And what's with this talk of deaths? We already know that a few old farts might kick the bucket, but the dog botherer has assured us that is hardly a tragedy, they were going to cark it anyway, so why not do it in a painful, isolated, cruel and undignified way?

Yet the bromancer seems disinclined to ascend to heaven and sit somewhere close to the long absent lord ...

Yes, there's a fine threading of the needle. Don't get the bromancer wrong, he's certainly not going to go up against Killer and Dame Slap and the dog botherer and the like when it comes to lockdowns, but hey there might be a few deaths, but that's the price the reptiles are willing to pay, provided it's not them of course ...

As for the bromancer's heresy regarding the Spanish flu, might the pond remind the bromancer that back on 25th July 2020, the dog botherer was pointing out that it was nothing like the Spanish flu ...

 

 

And so many other reptiles have made similar comparisons, the pond has lost count ... a bit like trying to count all the lemmings raging at the ABC.

Still, to be fair, way back when, the dog botherer was already facing the notion of a few deaths with equanimity ...

 

 

 

The pond hopes the suitably chastened bromancer has learned his lesson, and embraced death, in a way appropriate for a Murdochian reptile ... and if it puts a little stress on health care workers, what the heck, because there's nothing like a secure reptile, secure in the love of the chairman, disdainfully staring down at the masses ...

No, no, no, heretical bromancer, the pond has studied reptile lore. A few deaths among old farts, where's the harm, and trust in Gladys ...

Sorry, what's that you say? And it isn't a report from Florida?

 

Never mind, it's going to be all for the best in the gold standard world of Gladys, and dreams will come true, just click your heels and you might end up in Texas, and just keep saying 'la, la, la' as the pond offers up a final dose of bromancer heresy ... remember, it could have been worse, you could have trusted American promises ... and then we can move on to the infallible Pope for the day ...

The reptile debate this week has been realistic and good? Well that's Orwellian enough for the pond, and so in the end, despite all his gloomy talk, the bromancer scrapes by with a bare pass ... though his report card should say he must do better, and get more in tune with the reptile hive mind ...

And so to the infallible Pope to celebrate his success with the energiser bunny pounding out freedumb...