Sunday, January 22, 2017

In which the pond does a very huge Sunday meditation, so sad ...


Now those who want to duck out right away can head off to The Atlantic hereor visit Canadians in a state of agitation at the Globe and Mail here ...

For better or worse, and it's generally worse, much, much, very worse, the pond's beat consists of the reptiles of Oz.

It's obvious enough that the Donald's recipe of "only America first" means everyone else last.

No fair dibs, no share and share alike, no best buddies, just winners and losers and dropkicks ...

Do the reptiles understand this? Have they got the faintest idea of how the law of the playground bully might play out on the international stage?

Well the pond has only one post in it this day, but it's going to be huge, very huge, pretty bloody big huge ... and sad, very sad, so sad, so very, very sad...

First up is that dropkick loser and epic failure, prattling lightweight panderer quisling Peta ...



The fatuity of that opening splash might be more apparent if the pond were to be allowed a little transposing: Prime Minister Abbott might now be in Canberra, but "Canberra" will not change him ...

Instead it spat him and his loser sidekick out like a bit of hard to chew meat ... and that's the way things go.

There will be an end to President Trump, but reading the delusional panderers and the quislings, it might be a little hard to imagine at the moment ... and it might all end in tears, as these things often do ... especially if you think a man who presided over six bankruptcies has the sort of business skills a nation state needs to transform its economy ...


There it is, there's that mention of the onion muncher ...


... along with an over-estimation of the size of the crowd (and let's not mention the actual popular vote).

It might just be that the crowd the following day matches the crowd of the inauguration day ... but it's the usual way of dropkick losers to celebrate the wisdom of the crowds, at least until they become its victim ...


At the very least he means to be authentic? What, you can take authenticity to the bank, and the teller, while noting that at least you're authentic, will hand over that loan you were after?

What a stupid remark, by, it has to be said, an ineffably stupid woman ...


But please, while the pond has arranged a few visual distractions, we must press on ...


Stand by their convictions? Surely she jests? We know what happens when stupid onion munchers stand by their convictions ...


And so to a final burst of Peta ...


Oh fuck, she really does think no one can remember and she can burble on about elites in unashamed, fashion ...


Well that's enough of a stupid woman. It's time to turn to the reptiles of Oz, and the one good thing to say about the bromancer is that he decided to be short ...


That "big question" is of course a typical bit of clickbait trolling.

A couple of days ago, over at news.com.au, Gavin Fernando dared to scribble Here are the crucial policy questions Donald Trump still won't answer ...

They included the replacement, if any for Obamacare, how deportation might work, questions of ongoing conflicts of interest, relations with Russia and China, and the possible results of idle conflicting chatter about infrastructure ...

By way of contrast, the bromancer's big question - spoiler alert - was whether the Donald was the Donald, though in a fatuous way, he might just as well have asked if an orange is an orange, or a pipe a pipe ...


Being consistently the Donald, which is to say, rampantly, repeatedly, endlessly inconsistent, contradictory and foolish, is his chief virtue?


Almost as he scribbled it, even the bromancer must have realised the mindless mendacity of his opening gambit ...



Well as promised, the bromancer was short, and as they say about waffle, the less there is the sweeter it tastes ...


And that's the best he's got ... a dose of Trumpian paranoia about the Donald's enemies ... shades of Nixon already ...

Meanwhile, in the rest of reptile la la land, they trotted out a whole bunch of reptiles to contemplate these plus ├ža change times ...



Sadly, the pond could only pick a few, seeing as how one of them would have to be a dose of Paul "Ned" Kelly bloatware, which might make some punters yearn for a goodly dose of vapourware ...



Right from the get go, the pond felt the need of a bunch of New Yorker cartoons, and it's possible to get more New Yorker cartoons here, and skip the rest of the scribbling ...


Still one hardy masochist in the tent? See how well you handle this gobbet ...



Hmm, what did those squawking, squealing Canadians, cited at the very beginning, say about all this?


Well you won't read that in the reptiles of Oz, but then the Canadians are uncomfortably close to the scene of the crime and the bandit in their midst ...

Hmm, time for another cartoon ...


Well what else to do, because in his usual way, nattering "Ned" is not just mindless, so fascinated is he with the wonders of his insights, he's also endless, a one person scribbling machine wanting to chart new understandings of infinity and an endless universe of blather ...



Is this rhetorical questioning a prelude to another cartoon? So glad someone asked ...



Oh please, with the one remaining hardy masochist reader long gone, please, oh please, just let it end ... it's just too sad ...



Yawn. The pond has already jumped ship to China. If America is to be the winner, and everyone else must be losers, then better to get on board with the strongest of the losers ... and now, at last, it's time for nattering "Ned" to toddle off to the club, for a good stiff dry sherry ...



But wait, the pond promised something huge, something so sad, even if, so sadly, that means that nary a reader will be left to marvel at the speculations of the wondrous RG ...



The pond has been down this speculative path before with RG. Then it was what would happen if Trump's policies were taken up and applied to Australia ...

It's a simple matter in speculative fiction just to re-brand all the same nonsense and revert to the policies being applied in the United States and so to the world ...



The looming revolution? Well there's probably a cartoon in that ...



Now the only thing about all this is that RG's speculative fiction be retained for re-reading in a year's time. Or 200 days, whatever ...

Then we'll see how RG's powers of speculative fiction writing match up with what actually happens ...



Oh fuck, he's still blathering about draining the swamp, when in reality the Donald has re-stocked his swamp with billionaires, military men and Goldman Sachs people ... google Trump and Goldman Sachs and see how much news from the swamp there is ... six alumni, including the treasury secretary nominee, as the Goldman Sachs colossus returns to stalk the land ...

Oh okay, all it proves is that RG is shorthand for rabidly gibbering idiot, and everyone except the pond, off in the clouds of reptile la la land, already knew that ...

Sheesh, can se at least have a trash fire joke before we get to trashing the country and doing a final dash through RG's predictions ...



Yes, that'll do nicely, and now for those predictions, which the pond expects to be noted in 200 days time, or a year if you're feeling generous ...

Using the full to overflowing intertubes devices, the pond calculates that 200 days from the 21st January (well it's an American device, and so is a little behind the times), will be Wednesday, 9th August 2017 ...

How much of this nonsense will have come to pass by then?



What do you know? RG is such a thickhead and dunderer that he and his spell-checker fell into the old "bare" verses "bear" trap ...

The Donald will tell Germany, France, the UK and Italy that they will have to get naked?

Such a stupid, delusional, hyper-ventilating man, but a fitting way to end this very huge, very sad, oh so sad, Sunday piece ...

Naturally the pond has a word for all of this, and the endless mountains of analysis that will be certain to follow, before the great crash, or the clash of arms, or the impeachment hearings begin ...

Ennui ...



It certainly is a dilemma. Ennui ... as the world ends, not with a bang but a Donald ... oh, and don't forget the salivating simperings of the likes of a prattling Peta or a bullish RG, who is just waiting to be bitten by the the world going bareish...




Saturday, January 21, 2017

In which the pond does faux fake news with prattling Polonius ...


For a moment there, the pond thought that prattling Polonius had gone dullard yet again, and wandered back to memory hall to reminisce about the glory days with B. A. Santamaria ...

But as always, the pond underestimated Polonius's thirst for relevance ... because he's on to the subject of fake news like a hornet heading for a soda can ...


Aha, fake news. Now what's the bet there'll be lots of talk about fake news on the left, but not a word on the fake climate science that litters the Murdoch press, or the fake Catholic church favouritism that bedevils the scribbling of Polonius, as he strives to avoid that fake world known as purgatory within that fake religion?


Oh dear, there he goes again, wandering through the dusty halls ... can the pond travel back in time too?


Or part pure Franco-fascist loving loon, and for more purity of loonery, go here ...

Oh wait, there's even more from the same source, this time scribbling about Polonius himself?


Oh dear, the level of delusion ... is there anything to match it?


Well as always there's more Rowe here, but somehow the pond feels the need to finish off that onion munching thought bubble, penned in celebration of prattling Polonius's famous work ...


Now around this time, the pond imagines that any valiant reader who's made it this far has completely forgotten about Polonius's piece on fake news ...

But the pond loves its ideological scribblers, and so here's the final burst of one-sided recounting of history ...


And it goes without saying that the right intelligentsia in Australia (and elsewhere), especially what might be called the Opus Dei right of the Catholic church, has an appalling record in reporting the misdeeds and grave abuse of the Catholic church ...

Whatever else might be said about the Catholic church's rampant child abuse and cover up in Australia, the defence of the Pellists by the likes of the onion muncher, Polonius and the Bolter surely compound the grievous crimes that have been slowly revealed ...

If the fake religion of Marxism has produced much Stalinist misery, let's not overlook the misery produced by assorted loons worshipping their assorted gods ...

As for there being nothing new in fabricated reporting, why you only have to read the Murdochians on climate science, or watch Faux Noise for a nanosecond working diligently on behalf of the Trumpists ...

And now it's all come together, and no doubt in due course we'll be reading the diligent Polonius explaining how what's likely to befall the world in the next four years is all the fault of the lefties and the greenies ...


Pro Nobis Ut Deus indeed ...


In which the reptiles speak the pond's mind ...


All things shall pass, as noted here, but not the pond's determination to see RN's ratings move from * to ** ...

Vale Paul Gough, and the pond is so out of there, it's hello world and a whole new set of logarithms ...

But wait, what lurks outside the bubble, and should the pond take precautions?


It's a long time since the pond has felt the need to publish this sort of advice, but look what the Oz editorialist scribbled this morning ...


The Australian - which is to say the lizard Oz, the reptiles of Murdoch - are speaking your mind, which is to say, also the pond's mind, and any other mind within cooee?

They know the pond's mind and dare to speak it, and so their editorial is devoted to Paul Gough?

Or they've taken over the pond's mind and are using their power of mind control to make the pond speak of other things?


Oh dear sweet long absent lord, and day one of the Donald, and already the reptiles are speaking the pond's mind and exercising their hideous undisguised powers of mind control ...

Well what other sense to make of The Australian is speaking your mind ...?

And what secret message are they speaking?


Nothing so Australian as saying what you think?

Nothing so Australian as saying that The Australian really is a drop kick loser rag ready to regurgitate the most simple-minded, meaningless slogans it can find, as it scours the rubbish bin of history and weak jokes?



Well the pond thinks it can say with some safety that the one thing that would be most likely to embarrass and humiliate the pond and get it agitated, is to be given an honour which is actually a thinly veiled ploy for the reptiles of Oz to drape their own flag of pathetic obsessions on ...



Oh spare the pond's days ... 18C is now wrapped up with Ming the Merciless attempting to ban the Commies and Chifley nationalising the banks? And yet not a mention of the reptiles' attempt to speak the minds of everyone?

How much righteous tomfoolery can the reptiles deliver, along with an enormous dollop of self-regard?


This is where ideological obsession leads ... to be up yourself so wholly and completely that you lose all sense of perspective and begin to lead the life of mushrooms, speaking to yourselves in darkened caves ... but there's a positive outcome ...

At least the reptiles avoided giving the gong to Gina Rinehart ...


Keep us free and strong?

There's nothing more larrikin Australian than to mock this sort of sanctimonious, righteous blather, of the kind where patriotism ends up as the first and last refuge of the scoundrel reptiles ...

Never mind, the pond now has all this splendid artwork which it may as well throw into the mix ...