In which "Ned" sets a turtle pace for a meditative Sunday, followed by Polonius celebrating apartheid and the Killer roaming the killing fields ...

 

 

 

 

The pond held back nattering "Ned" for its Sunday meditative session, on the basis that nothing is more likely to help people return to their beds for a sleep-in than a serve of "Ned ...

There's a peculiar terror at the heart of "Ned" at the moment, dealing with the prospect of Scotty from marketing losing, only matched by the prospect of SloMo winning, and the reptiles forced to work hard to celebrate the continuing clown carnival, with the likes of a hapless "Ned" forced to keep applying lipstick to beautify the pigliness ...

 

Around this point, the pond is forced to pause and note that the the reptiles have an even better idea for a relaxing Sunday ... keep peddling "Ned" reading his column, and if the podcast isn't selling, why then embed the player in the text so you can get "Ned" coming and going, scribbling and reading out loud ...

The pond only notes it by way of a screen cap, much reduced in size, the scale suggesting the usefulness, when people might try stroking crystals, or doing a bit of ASMR, or staring self-hypnotically at the swinging gold watch they scored for years of service reading the reptiles ...

 

 

 

What a relief that's out of the way and nobody had to suffer  ...

 

 

Dear sweet long absent lord, do the reptiles think that "Ned" is now such a tedious, boring old fart that they have to whip in a snap of a sunset and the Opera House?

But if we're speaking of the states, the pond was reminded by the Graudian of the unseemly, preening, racist boasting of the Terror ...

 

 

Mexicans? And now the Terrorists think they're too good for the parrot, when really the parrot has been an expert in idle abuse, and is perfectly suited to the Terrorist style ...

Of course the other media weren't that helpful ...

 

The woman who saved Australia? Hubris, muchly?

And now the cockroaches are in a spin, and so are the reptiles, and so is "Ned" ...

 

 

But, butt, butt, billy goat "Ned", the Mexicans were kept south of the border, and gold standard Gladys saved the nation, and some people wonder why the pond keeps getting gloating, spiteful, mean, malicious calls from the Mexicans in the family ...

At this point, the reptiles decided to interrupt "Ned" with a snap even more vacuous than the text, and so the pond had to mark it down as well...

 

 

Really? That's the best the reptiles can do? Have they paid no attention to the advice of their kissing cousins at the Terror, as celebrated in the Weekly Beast ...

 

 

 

 Yes, a bikini or two would fix what ails "Ned" ... or at a pinch a poopy pup ...

 

If only "Ned" would lighten up a bit and the reptiles would find the right kind of snap for him ... why not Bingle things up a bit?

No? Come on, just a little close up ... it's the Terror, do it the proud Murdochian way ...

 

 

 

Never mind, on we press with dour old "Ned" ...

 

Oh it's hard for "Ned" ... that bloody strutting peacock Comrade Dan and now the reptiles pride and joy turned into fool's gold standard Gladys ...

No wonder "Ned" keeps grinding his gears and cranking out verbiage as a way of coping ...

 

At this point, the pond had one last consolation ... at least it wasn't listening to "Ned" read on and on, droning interminably like a bee up against a window pane.

Not even if there was pleasure to be found in "Ned" being delusional and - for a demented moment - not quite understanding where he works ... 

You know, with his blather about the worst misreading of the crisis coming from the populist right lobby and its media backers ...

Um, that'd be the lizard Oz, ma, and the dog botherer, who only yesterday featured in the pond's pages, and the home of the dog botherer, and the parrot, that cockroach of the airwaves, Sky News, and while we're at the litany of populist right media backers, let's not forget the bikini-loving, Mexican hating Murdochian tabloids and all the rest of "Ned's" kissing chairman Rupert cousins ...

 

 

Oh go tell that crap to the Murdochians or perhaps the parrot ... though this is a different paper ...

 

And yet there he still is on Sky News, bold as brass or at least as bold as a parrot on a pirate's shoulder squawking "pieces of hate" ...

 

 

Yes, yes, and it's gold standard Gladys, and wicked comrade Dan, and meanwhile, the likes of the dog botherer and the parrot are doing their best to help ...

For once the pond turned to prattling pedantic Polonius with a feeling of relief. At least he wasn't being obnoxious about the virus, he had other things to be obnoxious about ...

 

 

 

 

Silly old Julian broke Godwin's Law, and so set himself up as an easy target for a dose of Polonial wrath ...

 

 

Sui generis? Admirable really that Polonius refuses to recognise the existence of Godwin's Law, but on the general matter of the tweet, the pond tends to side with Polonius.

Talk of gulags is fair and proper, especially given the wall carving its way through the landscape, evoking memories of east Germany (you know, dog botherer style), and there's no doubt that the past few decades have seen an exercise in lebensraum ...

 

 

But perhaps the best term might involve a comparison with apartheid ... the two countries, regimes, certainly shared an eclectic affinity ...

 

 

 

But of course in our polonial world, such matters are best left swept under the carpet, so that a frothing and foaming and righteous indignation might dominate the discourse ...

 

For the record, and what's worth, "now a visit to a nation or a region does not necessarily bring with it knowledge or understanding", which is why Polonius sounds remarkably dumb by following up with "for the record, I have travelled to Israel."

For the record, the pond has had sex with a Jewish person, and yet in the end, so what? A tourist junket or a bit of fornication doesn't have much to do with the observable facts conveyed to the world by a wide range of observers and authors, many of whom don't resort to the easy trick of turning to talk of terrorists ... because one person's terrorist is another person's freedom fighter ...

 

Uh huh, and how does that end?

...In Hoffman’s words, “Notwithstanding the repeated denials of governments — terrorism can, in the right conditions and with the appropriate strategy and tactics, succeed in attaining at least some of its practitioners’ fundamental aims.”

But do go on, supporter of successful terrorists ...

 

 

What need of attacks when you have a wall?

 

 

 

 

 

And in the end that's why the pond favours the concept of apartheid ... because you don't get much more apart than that ...

 

The curious thing about Mark Leibler is that he's horribly unaware of the original meaning of semitic ... and perhaps also the meaning of apartheid ...

And so to a bonus, and though it means reverting to talk of the virus, how could the pond overlook the thoughts of the Killer?

It's a short affair, and full of the usual banal images the reptiles peddle these days, though these are perhaps not as off-putting as the Killer himself ...

Another terrible banal snap. Ffft to a snap of the word Pfizer.

Can't the reptiles spring for one of those surveys showing the cartoons of the week? To illuminate the current American experience?

 

 

Yes, there's nothing like news of a conservative radio host battling the virus to make the pond realise there's nothing to learn from the US, or Killer's litany ...

Sheesh, another banal illustration. Can't we have something more in keeping with the Killer?

That's more like it. How long before Killer will be echoing the call for free-dumb?

 

At this point, the reptiles really shocked the pond with the depths of depravity their graphics department has reached in these post-cult master times ...

 

 

Even reduced to the lowest level possible, the awesomeness of the banality shone through ... but then ...

 

It's true, it's impossible to cure stupid in the graphics department at the lizard Oz, or in much else doing the rounds in the real world.

And so to what passes for advice in the lizard Oz thanks be unto the Killer ...

It would be possible to tote up a list of the stupidities in that gobbet, but no need. This was what was needed in Enmore on Saturday to stop the assorted devotees of Killer assembling, ready to riot and cry out for free-dumb ...

That's just around the corner from the pond; the previous week's riotous rioters set out from Victoria Park in Camperdown...

And here they were later in the day at Parramatta road ...

 

 

 

Good on 'em, keep the loons off the street and in the News Corp offices where they belong. And the pond just wanted to reassure everyone that the Irish shoppe was open for essential supplies ...

Never mind, the pond stayed well clear, and probably should have done the same when coming closer to the Killer's pragmatic solution ...

What's so funny about this? Well it's the usual call for free-dumb, and at one point the pond was going to include another bonus in the form of Gemma, sounding much like the killer.

In the end, the pond ran out of steam - it was too long gone to include the full Gemma, the featherweight of the weekend reptile pack - but she should be honoured for coming up with this Killeresque-light snowflake whining...

 

 

Nobody is suggesting? And come to think of it, no one else has endured alcoholism in the home, or sundry other illnesses?

Come on featherweight Gemma, get in step with the reptile mantra, courtesy of the killer ...

 

Yep, let her rip, cry free-dumb, anything so long as Killer isn't made to wear a mask, that's just too terrifying a notion for Freudian words ...

And with all that done andn dusted, it occurred to the pond that -  thanks to the orange one leaving the scene - it had been a long time since the pond had dropped in on Tom Tomorrow, and what a splendid set of suggestions he had for future  reptile wars ...

Pay attention Killer, much has been done, but much remains to be done, and the battles never end ...

And so to a decision tree the pond quite liked, found at McSweeney's ...