In which the pond celebrates "je ne suis pas un reptile" ...

The reptiles are in a state of high alarm verging on paranoid hysteria, and as always, the pond marvels at their capacity to soar and swirl in unison ...

There's the Bolter and Allan and others, and they're all in martyrdom mode. Now it might be recalled that in the matter of Charlie Hebdo, some 12 were murdered and 11 more were injured.

The last time the pond checked there hadn't been a mass slaughter in the Surry Hills bunker, and so the cry to do a Je suis Bill Leak was a trifle more moot than the reptiles imagined, especially if it involved defending an indefensible cartoon, not about barking mad Islamic fundamentalists, but making fun, in the usual racist Leak way, of blacks who routinely cop a pounding, and score outside the average in the way of prison sentences and lack of opportunities ...

In fact the martyrdom complex verges on the offensive as well as the delusional. Let's not make light of what others went through. by donning their mantle of pain and suffering, and pretending somehow it's the same as our own.

In the usual way, the Bolter was ropeable (ah, Australia, the pond was walking past a Camperdown public bar the other day and heard the immortal words 'grouse and all that') ...

Oh fuck, Bill Leak thinking he's Bob Dylan. Where does delusionalism start and end? 

As for the rest, there's no need to recycle the Bolter recycling others, because once again, he presented the indefensible ...

Oh okay if you can't spot the source of that blather about neo-Marxist dictatorships, you haven't been reading the pond, and so you wouldn't be able to understand how Aboriginal people have suddenly become a "manufactured minority", apparently minted in the disused car manufacturing plants that litter the country.

What does it feel like to be labelled "manufactured minorities"?

Apparently it's like being a persecuted reptile set upon by the hordes of neo-Marxists who run the country ...

And so back to Allan, the late-breaking little Sir Echo who didn't even have the imagination to vary the Bolter's line ... but that's what happens when they send the pods around the country in specially marked trucks so that they can lie in the cellar and transform into the hive mind ...

About now, the pond should mentions that the barking mad, baying at the moon, loon of the first water Allan writes regularly for the lunar fringe in The Spectator and Quadrant.

Of course the pond mentions this, not, you understand, to offend or insult the good academic, nor with any sort of tone the legal eagle might dislike, but simply to lay the unemotive facts on the table, in a way and with words that encourage a healthy and rational discourse ...

Of course the pond wouldn't usually use these robust words, as stout as English soil - the answer always lies in the soil - but the pond knows that we're in the company of 18C haters, who enthusiastically welcome the chance to make a vigorous point in plain Anglo-Saxon speak ... a spade is a spade, so to speak, and a fuck-witted Canadian carrying on like a pork chop (said in the famously familiar and friendly way of Tamworthians of old, a cheerful form of endearment and greeting)...

Lordy, long absent lordy, there's a lot more where that lot came from ... and so to Allan shedding tears for freedom boy ... come back, freedom boy, come back (said in the tone of Shane):

Indeed, indeed. Well before the pond goes around saying "Je suis un reptile", would it be possible to tone down the paranoid martyrdom complex?

It's just too much, especially when wheeled out in defence of the indefensible.

Admittedly, Bill Leak does his best to turn himself into a down under Jeanne d'Arc at every turn, delivering trolling cartoon after cartoon, attention-seeking in a combative way ...

The provocation is tiresome and adolescent, and in due course, he will no doubt retire like a Pickering to pick his nose and scribble scurrilous cartoons about harridans ... but more importantly, he routinely commits an even bigger crime, which is failing to be funny.

Has there ever been a less comical cartoonist?

The way the drawing has degenerated into thick, coarse heavy and crude lines (and not just in the balloons) results in stereotypes even before a word is uttered, and there's never a reason to check out the work, except of course when he sets out to offend, insult, and generate anger ... though small boys achieve this by kicking the pond in the shins, and dogs by slobbering and shedding hair ...

The reptiles shower him with devoted, astonishing and largely undeserved loyalty, in the same way Fox News keeps admiring Donald Trump.

They need to get hold of a few more Kudelkas, and retire Leak, and then we can all wear a tin badge saying "je suis en panne d'essence" or if you will, "I've run out of gas", which is a handy phrase when amongst the French...

It's a funny reason to exist in the world, to buzz around in decreasing circles like an irritating and distracting blowfly in search of the next pile of dung, which is why the pond likes to settle back with other cartoonists ...

You can find Moir's cartoon gallery here, and surely this is one those who criticise Malware from the left, and the right, can enjoy ...