In which the stout-hearted bromancer once again shouts nuts to the world ...

 

Despite shameless pandering by a certain correspondent who shall remain nameless, the pond's contest to identify the hamlet in the Tamworth district that hosts a series of fine art works remains open.

This time the pond offers a staggeringly obvious clue ...

The pond will announce any winners in a special late arvo post this day - remember a free subscription to the pond is the handsome prize, or better still, a lifetime of reptile reading.

And so to the reptiles and what a dismal day yet again ...

The reptiles are in full election mode and so managed to avoid in its headline stories any mention of King Donald's pique at Ukraine and his abject desire to sell out to Vlad the sociopath ...

Was it so long ago that the bromancer was in a state of rampant hysteria about the Ruskis?

It was, it was, it was on18th April, when he cranked out Russia’s actions in SE Asia are undeniable. Why is Anthony Albanese playing dumb on this?, Labor are making blind assurances on Russia and Indonesia that there’s nothing to see here. Don’t be fooled, don’t be reassured.

King Donald is doing his level best to pander to Vlad the Sociopath - dictators 'r us - and yet the reptiles remain mute, while the bromancer did his best to whip up a storm to help out the Duttonator ...

The Russian effort to become a military presence in Southeast Asia, especially in Indonesia, is sustained, undeniable and deeply antagonistic to Australia’s national interests.
Peter Dutton is right to make a fuss of it. The Albanese government is breaching the spirit, if not the letter, of the caretaker conventions by refusing to give the opposition a briefing on the issue.
If nothing’s happening, why is the government scared of giving a briefing? In fact our intelligence agencies would have metaphorically thick files full of material about Moscow’s military relationship with Jakarta.
Russia is Indonesia’s main military supplier. Prabowo Subianto visited Vladimir Putin in Moscow before his inauguration as president. Since then Indonesia has hosted Russia’s Defence Minister, Deputy Prime Minister and sundry defence officials. Does the Labor government think they were in Indonesia for a holiday?
Bland assurances from Defence Minister Richard Marles that there’s nothing to see here are about as reassuring as his promises to spend serious money on defence some time in the distant future. Don’t be fooled, don’t be reassured.

And so on and so forth, and meanwhile over on the extreme far right this morning, there was the usual smattering of reptile chattering the pond was keen to avoid ...

Petulant Peta was top of the world, ma, early in the morning ...

What have we done to deserve Labor?

Surely we are capable of better than this: a limp discussion among second-rate people of second-order issues – such as who can offer the biggest handout – is the sure sign of a nation in decline.
By Peta Credlin
Columnist

Well might you ask what the world has done to deserve a petulant Peta rant? 

Nothing to see there folks, a hard pass, keep the line moving, and so the pond moved down the list to simplistic Simon ...

High voter churn in contest of character
The scale of the negative campaign against Peter Dutton is colossal. Yet the Coalition appears to have no strategy to counter this, unless it is one that is deeply hidden from the rest of us.
By Simon Benson
Political Editor

The pond once again wondered why the reptiles fail to mention the bleeding obvious, the Bid elephant in the room, as simpleton Simon yet again offered his insights ...

...There is no doubt that Labor’s posture at the beginning of the year was to approach this election campaign at a macro level from a deeply defensive position. Liberal strategists point to this as evidence Labor is worried about the outcome.
The weather has changed since then, and over the course of the campaign, and this is now a wrong assessment of Labor’s approach, based on its own internal polling.
Three months ago Labor was not in denial about the challenges it faced in Victoria. It was no secret that there was a significant levels of concern about the number of seats that could be lost in that state.
The Labor campaign in Victoria has recently switched, however. It has moved to a mix of both defensive and attack.
In the past few days, Labor has expanded its campaign tactics into Liberal-held seats like Menzies and Deakin, in an obvious offensive posture. This is unlikely to have showed up yet in the transparency data.
What this says is that both parties are preparing for an election that could produce a high exchange of seats.
Labor is not unrealistic about the likelihood that it may lose several seats, but is the Coalition prepared for the increasing possibility that it now stands to lose some as well?
In 2022, Labor felt at the end that it had the dominant argument that there were problems that had mounted up under the Coalition and the country couldn’t afford another three years of Scott Morrison.
Its argument was that the Coalition remained in denial about the problems that needed to be fixed and the only way to take the country forward was through new leadership.
Labor managed to hold on to all its 2019 vote and was able to add to it. What the Coalition was trying to do was hold on to fence sitters.
What is happening this time is a starkly different dynamic. There is no doubt there are swinging voters who backed Labor in 2022 and who are now buying the Coalition message that households have gone backwards and the country can’t afford another three years of Albanese.
But then there are also those voters who backed the Coalition last time who think Labor hasn’t done too badly and are completely averse to Dutton.
This is producing an atypically high exchange, or churn, of votes. Whether this translates into a high exchange of seats will obviously hold the key to the election outcome.
And this is what makes that outcome so unpredictable. It is still not impossible the Coalition could carve out minority government. It remains unlikely but no one should be thinking it’s over just yet.

Well he would hold out hope, wouldn't he?  

Has anything changed since this story appeared in the Nine rags under the header Unmasked: McKenzie's shopping trip to remember with new partner.

Shouldn't at the least there be a note appended to every report he scribbles, or at best, he steps aside for the duration of the campaign?

Why is it left to the hive mind readers to find notes on the situation in X, downgraded by the Muskian logarithms?

Come to think of it, there was nothing about Uncle Leon, the Tesla share price, or other ongoing US meltdowns in this day's reptile headlines coverage.

Instead there was much yammering about defence, beginning with an 'umble Dean...

Sure, there’s some unity on defence, but we need a real strategy
We have a Coalition with a big pledge to increase defence spending with no detail and no plan, and a government with a detailed plan but not enough money.
By Peter Dean

Ah that reminds the pond of the old joke about the way you need to say something is real before it becomes real, or even surreal. What we need are real solutions to real problems, really truly ...

Gentle Ben was also packing a gun ...

Coalition’s popgun policy lacking in credible detail
The Coalition’s defence policy is remarkably thin on detail and has come too late in the campaign to make much of a difference anyway.
By Ben Packham
Foreign Affairs and Defence Correspondent

Oh dear, he sounded a little depressed ...

In such dire circumstances, the pond always turns back to the bromancer. 

Sure he could only muster what the reptiles decided was a two minute read, but he'd send Ben packing, and put the 'umble Dean in his place...

Too little, too late: Peter Dutton has no defence for this, It’s still too little, too late and shrouded in the most kack-handed amateurism in delivery, messaging and substance that you could possibly imagine.

Oh dear, et tu bromancer? 

And yet it was such a fine splash, featuring a handsome pair, with the pastie Hastie finally coming out of hiding ...

For those who can't recognise the pair in all their glory: Opposition Leader Peter Dutton and opposition defence spokesman Andrew Hastie at Blacktree Technology in Belmont, WA, on Wednesday. Picture: Richard Dobson / NewsWire

And remember the mysterious incantation, which must be said three times with clicking heels if you want to end up in Kansas: This article contains features which are only available in the web version, Take me there

At the get go, the bromancer tried to soften the blow, dull the pain, but quickly folded ...

The Dutton opposition’s defence policy is much better than that of the Albanese government.
Labor deserves to lose the election on defence alone.
It has overseen continued weakening of Australia’s military capabilities, refused to make a meaningful defence spending increase, ignored the advice of everyone it’s appointed to look at the situation, cannibalised key capabilities in order to pay for the distant AUKUS subs, and refused to make serious reform of the grotesque inefficiencies and paralytic delays in the whole defence process.
But saying Dutton’s policy is better than Labor’s exhausts every single thing that can be said in its favour.

It’s still too little, too late and shrouded in the most kack-handed amateurism in delivery, messaging and substance which you could possibly imagine.
Dutton and his defence spokesman Andrew Hastie promise to lift defence spending from 2 per cent of GDP now to 2.5 per cent in five years. That’s too slow. Nearly half the increase lies beyond the first term of a Dutton government.

Eek, there goes the war with China by Xmas ...

The bromancer was inconsolable ...

The press conference announcing the policy was bizarre. Dutton could barely bring himself to utter two cliches in a row about defence before desperately returning to his focus group talking points about bulk-billing rates, tax deductions for mortgage payments, petrol excise etc.
There was zero sense this is a Coalition priority, that it wants to campaign on defence.
Equally bizarre, there wasn’t even the most general outline of what military capabilities the Coalition wanted to acquire.

No kit? How's the bromancer going to take on Xi?

At this point the reptiles interrupted with an AV distraction featuring the Ughmann, Sky News Political Contributor Chris Uhlmann says Australia must be spending “way more” of defence amid a Trump White House and an aggressive Xi Jinping. The Coalition will unveil its highly anticipated defence spend, which will top out at 3 per cent of GDP within the decade. That's an estimated $21 billion higher than the Labor Party. “The worst-case reasonable scenario is the United States is not necessarily coming to our aid – should the worst happen,” Ms Uhlmann said.

Say what? It's Ms Uhlmann now? When did that happen? Was it an Ēostre miracle, a final effort by Frank in his passing?

Has anyone let the bigot J. K. Rowling know, so she could let forth another round of bigotry?

Never mind, the bro still had a few words to say, a way of reclaiming his rightful place as the defence king of lizard Oz reptiles ...

Dutton was too scared to mention China until forced. Beijing has defeated both Labor and the Coalition in an important, potentially debilitating development in Australian politics. Criticism of China now is seen by ethnic Chinese Australians as criticism of them.
This is a serious matter. Both sides of politics should refer to the Beijing government as the PRC, short for People’s Republic of China. The pro-Beijing orientation of so much Chinese language media in Australia should be better contested. The activities of arms of Beijing influence within the diaspora should be restricted so that no Australian feels intimidated. That’s all for another day.

Bloody ethnic Chinese, ruining everything. 

Speak up, or don't, because it's all for another day, and let's get to the gobsmacking and the nuttiness ...

When questioned on the gobsmackingly nutty delay in getting this policy out, Dutton said it was because the Coalition had to see what the budget bottom line was first. In other words, the Coalition had to see how much social spending Labor was going to do, match almost all of it and then add in all its own electoral bribes, then see what was left over for defence.
Nothing could better illustrate that the Coalition conceives defence policy in exactly the wrong way. You should decide what you need to do to make the nation secure and how much that will cost. Then you make your other spending decisions.
You don’t leave defence till last so you can adjust a few billion dollars one way or the other to accommodate electoral bribes. That’s the dismal old-think that has got us in the chaotic defence mess we inhabit today.
There’s still no explanation for the national media absence, until Tuesday, of Hastie. Simon Birmingham was a senior, competent, powerful voice in foreign affairs, who held the government to account, was on top of his brief, seldom made a mistake, had been a senior minister and had authority. Diabolically for the Coalition, he retired.
His replacement, David Coleman, is virtually unknown. With Hastie effectively in hiding, the Coalition pursued a national security election with the perfect trifecta: no visible defence spokesman, no visible foreign affairs spokesman, and no defence policy.
You couldn’t make it up.

That's it? That's all the bromancer wrote?

And as for the rest of the reptile pack, not a single mention of what a great place to nuke the country to save the planet the Hunter Valley was?

Never mind, the pond was briefly distracted by lizard Oz correspondence:

Pope Francis will be a hard act to follow on climate concern, Pope Francis described climate change as a “profound moral crisis” and recognised its effects on humanity, especially disadvantaged people.

The late Pope Francis was in many ways a man of the 21st century. One thing that stands out in my mind is his concern for the state of the planet.
Pope Francis described climate change as a “profound moral crisis” and recognised its effects on humanity, especially disadvantaged people. It might be hard to find someone to follow in his footsteps.
Anne O’Hara, Wanniassa, ACT

Relax Anne, it's all under control ...

Mornington Peninsula council scraps climate emergency plan (archive link)

A coastal Victorian council in a high erosion risk zone has scrapped its climate emergency declaration and plan after a controversial split vote on Tuesday night.
The Mornington Peninsula Shire was among many councils to declare a climate emergency in 2019. At the time, the council passed the declaration unanimously and called for immediate and urgent action.
But on Tuesday night, deputy mayor Paul Pingiaro’s motion to overturn the council’s climate emergency declaration and its accompanying climate emergency plan was successful in a vote of six councillors against five.
The decision drew fierce criticism from opposing councillors and one of Victoria’s most prominent environmentalist groups.
Pingiaro’s motion said future climate-related proposals that would previously have been supported by the climate emergency plan would now be subject to an itemised budget or council report.
During the meeting, Pingiaro insisted the motion was not about denying climate change.

You see Anne? It's not about denying climate change, it's about doing nothing about it, or doing it the right, budget responsible way.

Let another lizard Oz correspondent set you on the right path, listen to Ron ...

When a federal election result is based on which party dishes out the most sugar hits, the biggest loser is the public. With little regard for the means to pay for this extreme largesse, the biggest winners are overseas banks as our debt approaches $1 trillion and the annual interest bill $28bn.
Unlike Anthony Albanese, Peter Dutton recognises the issues facing Australia and his proposals for lower energy prices based on a balanced energy mix, his plans for nuclear power and his commitment to streamline the regulatory framework would all boost industry and grow the economy, leading to balanced budgets and lower debt.
Ron Hobba, Camberwell, Vic

Oh Ron, as they used to say in the Glum family ... how excellent, what a first class way to nuke the Hunter Valley to save the planet.

Why, you've inspired the pond to do a special late arvo retrospective with the Bjorn-again one assuring the world that everything is for the best in the best of all climate change worlds.

All that's left for the moment is to sign off with the infallible Pope, celebrating the current state of policy plays ...