Tuesday, August 02, 2016

In which the pond gets down and dirty with the arm-breaker and a frothing and foaming of blonde fear ...

On Tuesdays, in a desperate attempt to match the appeal of the lizard Oz Caterists for devotees of the weird and the wonderful, the Daily Terrorists double down with the taxi-driver arm-breaker and a blonde Nine bombshell...

The pond isn't entirely sure of the point of the exercise, beyond the usual fear-mongering alarmism and the hating of the women and so on ...

Perhaps the best thing about the arm-breaker's routine trolling is a reminder of how Australia dodged a bullet by not electing the arm-breaker to a position of real power.

It might seem astonishing that the arm-breaker should make a war criminal like John Howard seem like a safe pair of hands, but he achieves the feat with singular ease.

Take this bit of trolling that he drops in at the end of his column ...

Well an arm-breaking troller would feel affinity with Trump and would want him to win.

It's the sort of idle mindless provocation that Latham is much given to these days ... and so John Howard, war criminal, seems like an even safer pair of hands.

As for traducing women, Latham also keeps his hand in, because the world can never have enough misogyny ...

This week it's Clementine Ford that must shoulder the burden...

Now Ford can look after herself - she Twitters here - and what intrigues the pond is the grotesque nature of the Latham trolling, which freely ranges from Morrison to a gratuitous attack on Ford.

It's astonishing the level of bitterness and bile. It almost seems designed to make Donald Trump seem like an empathetic, sympathetic feminist ...

Perhaps that's the game plan, perhaps that's the contribution the arm-breaker's making to a world understanding of the Donald.

And now here comes the really hard yards for devotees of weirdness ...

In ordinary times, the next pond piece might have been called, in pond spirit, a commercial television moment, but in the patented but freely available Lathamite spirit, it can only be called a blonde moment.

The problem, even for devotees, is the inordinate length of the tedious rant. It makes a Caterist or a prattling Polonius or even a "Ned" Kelly seem like experts in terse, curt, brusque, clipped and economical exposition ...

The pond understands if readers drop like flies or go about their business. At least when listening to a bit of Sturm und Drang music, it's possible to do the washing up.

There's no chance of any useful social activity whatsoever arising from a reading of Caroline Marcus:

What this reveals, most of all, the pond would suggest, is the urgent need and desire of commercial television for a large-scale terror attack to strike Australia, and when you think about it, if confronted by flagging ratings, the sooner the better, and so the more eyeballs will be drawn to the nation's screens ...and where's the harm in that?

This will be a win-win for everyone except those called on to be the victims of the terror attack.

To facilitate this, it's extremely helpful to indulge in a goodly bout of hysterical fear-mongering ...while sharing a blonde collegiate moment ...

Now while doing this, it's also handy to feature the ratbags and do the publicity work for Daesh, just in case Daesh haven't managed to do it for themselves.

There's absolutely no room for the likes of Bernard-Henri Lévy hand-wringing in The Graudian We should relegate terrorists to the obscurity of their own infamy.

There's not even room for the measured suggestions of Roy Greenslade in Why we should publish the photographs of Isis terrorists ...

How will all this namby-pamby hand-wringing sell gutter tabloid yellow press newspapers shrieking their headlines, how will this promote commercial television wanting to shove feet in door?

Why it's simply impossible and there's an urgent need to demonise and promote so that terrorists might feel as big and as grand as Ned Kelly must have done (the cop killer, not the newspaper columnist).

It's splendid stuff, and when you come to think about it, after the terrorists have done their dirty deeds, count up the number of publishing opportunities for journalists wanting to get into print with their true crime accounts of the dirty deeds. 

Think of the many ways that organised crime might be conflated with terrorism to produce a frothing and foaming frenzy of blonde fear!

Actually we can only hope that Marcus continues to demonise Middle Eastern folk. That way seems the most likely way to produce that which she most devoutly hopes for ... a ratings bonanza for commercial television. Oh and a few incidental deaths. But hey, just like Donald Trump making the ultimate sacrifice by dodging service in Vietnam, so it must fall to a chosen few to take the fall in the cause of commercial television and so that misfits might be celebrated as criminal overlords and masterminds, running gangs that must be joined as a way of learning a trade skill ...

All that's left is to marvel at the ways that the Daily Terror works to make Australia a better place day after day ...

No need shrink ... just get the lad to read Marcus and Latham in the Terror, champion paper for the western suburbs of Sydney ...


  1. Hi Dorothy,

    We did indeed dodge a bullet with the non-election of Latham, a man with evidently deep seated “issues”, unfortunately we weren’t so lucky to avoid the elevation of Abbott to the position of Prime Minister.

    It begs the question, how in an era of so called “professional politics”, can such deeply unsuitable/unstable people be considered within their own parties as possible leadership material?

    Even from the distance of just reading and watching the news it was pretty evident Latham and Abbott were damaged goods but still their parties persisted with them. Why?

    Both Labor and the Liberals appear to have become the tools of vested interests and instead of representing the make up of their electorates, they instead have become exclusive clubs pushing narrow self serving policies.

    The trend for more independent politicians will increase as the electorate realise the major parties no longer speak or act in their best interests.


    1. DW
      I have a poster which has the quote "never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups"
      I purchased the poster after sitting in a meeting of a large "Customer Focussed" organisation, which seriously discussed raising the steps to their outlets to discourage the "Value Depletors" (AKA pensioners and other folk with mobility issues) from entering.
      Stupidity knows no bounds.

  2. So, this "Slasher" McKay bloke; he says that when he was involved with this task force, the people they were targeting were "traditional" criminals. But now, ten years later - when he's no longer involved in this area (and how long since he left, I wonder) - he somehow knows for sure that it's a recruiting ground for radicals. Just how does he know this?

    I'm also intrigued by his idea that Islam intrinsically supports the concept of crime as a hereditary, family pursuit, whereas other major religions actually discourage such traditions. Hmmmm - I know little about Islam, but I don't recall any scenes in "The Sopranos", the "Godfather" films or many other organised crime dramas that involved shady characters reading the Koran.

    As for Latham - a thug, a bully and desperately unfunny. I didn't think I could rate anyone lower than Abbott, but at least the latter hasn't continually attempted to smear Rosie Batty.

    1. The pond apologises for the wider dissemination of nonsense, but appreciates the restraint in your response, when the pond might have simply resorted to fowl language and hoped that the pair of cackling geese might have slipped on a milkshake in the News Corp lobby and been retired for life ...


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