Sunday, June 02, 2024

Warning: this is strictly for higher level herpetology students. Light Dame Slap and nattering "Ned" wicks and stand well clear ...

 

Warning: this is strictly for higher level herpetology students. If freshers want some entertainment, refer them Furious Felon on the like ...while even experienced reptile handlers might think carefully about the need to light taper and then stand well clear ...




There is a reason the pond has isolated this contaminated material to a late arvo slot, and the reasons will become clear enough in due course ...




There's something about other women that brings out the pure, undiluted inner bitch in Dame Slap ... just that opening is pure bitchery and undiluted stupidity, and a reminder to experienced reptile handlers of the importance of reading Margaret Simons' In publicising Laura Tingle’s ‘counselling’, the ABC risks giving the bullies a victory before starting on Dame Slap ...

...Three weeks ago, she (Tingle) gave the John Button oration in Melbourne, on the topic of “off-course” public discourse.
It was a lengthy, layered and intellectually nuanced speech. I cannot do it justice here. But given the topic, it was inevitable that she talked about News Corporation. Her words are worth quoting at some length.
"Let’s leave aside the daily investment of resources invested in News Corp journalists in search of stories with which to troll the ABC … It’s a little mystifying how a company that has had to pay out an estimated $2bn – so far – in legal settlements for illegally hacking peoples phones, and other invasions of privacy, has set itself up as an arbiter of journalistic standards.
While big media corporations seem to have felt no great responsibility to account for what they have done, the ABC’s public funding gives it an obligation to do so, as best it can ... The News Corp campaigns against public broadcasters like the ABC, or for that matter whatever public figure/idea they are pursuing, is relentless and all-embracing."
I was at that speech. Afterwards, members of the audience speculated on how long it would be before the Australian made Tingle pay for her remarks.
And, three weeks later, here we are.

And here we are yet again, compleat with video of the wicked witch ...




What's remarkable about Dame Slap's joining the relentless and all-embracing campaign is the way that it gets deeply weird and deeply personal ...




Now anybody with half a brain would know that Danish migrants aren't likely to experience the sort of racism that someone from Somalia experiences when they turn up here.

A Danish migrant's experience isn't also likely to generate a deep understanding of the racism encountered each and every day by Aboriginal people.

For what it's worth, the pond has worked with and for Aboriginal people, and has had the odd conversation with black African migrants, and some of the 'reveals' have been hair raising.

Speaking of which, at this point the reptiles decided to run a few snaps.

For no particular reason, they began with a huge snap of Dame Slap. 

Usually the pond would downsize this sort of thing, but the narcissism is germane to the story ... and so here's a rough imitation ...





Compounding that weirdness, the reptiles decided to include an ancient family photo, in an almost cult-like way,  since it has nothing to do with Tingle's thought crimes, the ABC's wanton criminality, nor the matter of racism in Australia ... 

Again it was full on ...





What on earth does that have to do with the price of eggs in China?

What's remarkable is that the reptiles managed to replicate this sort of narcissism again, once they got past the next meandering gobbet ...




Yep, here it comes ... not content with the Danish angle, Dame Slap decided to introduce a fawning commentary from a British import, again not someone you'd necessarily associate with the experience of being black in Australia, whether migrant or first people.

For some inexplicable reason, the reptiles decided he too needed the big photo treatment ...




What's that got to do with the price of eggs in Japan? Or racism in Australia?

Why him? We've been hearing from the invaders for a couple of centuries or so. What about a word from the invaded? Or how about a footballer?





How about a Somali? Fun idea, what about Yassmin Abdel-Magied talking about life with the reptiles?

Again the reptiles doubled down with a huge snap from the photo album?




So he was in a hostel. Big deal. 

The pond spent its early years in an army Nissen hut, and if you wandered into the hills, you'd likely meet a tiger snake hiding under a log, and if you went down to the little shop, if you were lucky you'd see a man bashing a black snake to death with an axe handle ...

The huts were at Oxley Vale, just outside Tamworth, and long gone now, and the pond isn't going to provide a family photo, but this image of a migrant hostel is pretty much a dead ringer, apart from the lack of boardwalks with overhead cover, and a dinkum slope, the ones in Oxley Vale being clustered in the foothills ...





What does any of it prove, what does it have to do with Tingle, the ABC, or racism in Australia?

SFA ...but it has a lot to do with the uncomprehending narcissism of the reptiles lurking in their hive minds ...




Not as far as the pond can work out. The pond thought that Tingle was saying that this is a racist country, and there's no doubt there's a deep history of racism in relation to Aboriginal people ... 

It wasn't so long ago up Tamworth way that you could idly dismiss someone as being a tad Aboriginal by saying they had "a touch of the tar".

You get a whiff of that in the line "There were ... a few Aboriginals."

That's not to mention the ongoing racism featured routinely in the lizard Oz in relation to people of Asian descent, or those of "middle eastern appearance" (though the reptiles these days have no trouble confusing that description with those of the Islamic faith, no matter than there are Xians and Jews of middle eastern appearance, with race, whatever it is, not a religion).

In short, the more that Dame Slap protests, the more she reveals of herself, and the whole rotten Murdochian culture ...




Yep, if you don't agree with someone, you've got to "fix the problem." Perhaps disappear them into a cornfield, or take them out to the gravel pit ...

Well the pond did warn experienced reptile handlers that it would be a difficult and dangerous task, but as promised, the pond has arranged a few cartoons to help with the "Ned" Everest climb ...

At one point the pond had thought of ignoring it altogether, but how to resist the challenge of dying on Everest, as so many climbers these days are wont to do ...

As usual, there's a lot of Chicken Little stuff about the sky falling, and "Ned" running around hysterically nattering about the end of the world ...




Is genocide really that complex?






The pond presumes that cartoon might not have helped, but it's certainly better than the next "Ned" gobbet, because inevitably "Ned"will join in the reptile Tingling ...




Note the careful "Ned" phrasing. "Seems a virtual endorsement."

In other words, feel free to say that "Ned"'s scribbling seems like a virtual endorsement of racism ...

At this point the reptiles inserted a huge snap of the wicked witch, no doubt on the basis ...

"The News Corp campaigns against public broadcasters like the ABC, or for that matter whatever public figure/idea they are pursuing, is relentless and all-embracing."

The pond is over it, and so shrank the Tingling, but if you want an idea of the original size, take a look at the narcissist snaps above ...





Then it was on to "Ned" doing what he most likes to do ... regurgitating the thoughts of others ...






The thoughts of others means that "Ned" can transfer the temperature of the political discourse away from himself, and on to others ...




Poor Noel, he was once much loved by the reptiles, but was then cast into the briar patch ...

Fun note: "Noel Pearson, interviewed by Inquirer in the wake of the referendum defeat..."

The pond checked and yep, the referendum happened back on 14th October 2023, and when the pond googled "Ned's" quoting of Noel, the only reference that turned up was to this column.

As Churchill might say, some slow moving Inquirer, some wake ... a wake that's apparently taken months to hit the reptile shores ...

Never mind, there was a snap of Noel ... (but not so big as to be unseemly) ...




By the way, there's comedy to be found in "Ned" quoting the grave Sexton in the matter of climate policy, antipathy to all forms of Christian religion, and a bill of rights.

Damn you United States, with your pinko perv Commie socialist ways ...

Here's what you can do with your bill of rights ...






The pond can hear some groaning and sighing coming from the stalls, and even a murmured "enough already", but there's still four gobbets of undiluted "Ned"hysteria to go - how he loves his bloatware - and that's way the pond put this in a safe "experienced reptile handlers" slot ...




Not the Calvary hospital routine again ...

Here's what you can do with your bill of rights ...





To be fair, "Ned" did then offer one undiluted moment of pure comedy gold to relieve the tedium.

Cue "Fisher, a moderate church leader ..."

That'd be this fisher of men ...

Archbishop Fisher urged parishioners to vote "no" in the same-sex marriage postal survey in 2017, arguing it would "deconstruct" marriage and family in Australia.
He has also denounced same-sex couples as parents and claimed it is best for children to have a mother and a father. (ABC)

Best of all of course is simply not to have sex, and embrace chastity, or if you must have sex, better to marry than to fry in eternal hellfire ...

Sounds just like your fair average Catholic bigot, with the Pope showing the way with his gossip thingie ...

Sorry, the pond didn't mean to get in the way of "Ned", still happily regurgitating ...




For a moment there the pond thought that the grave Sexton was talking about the lizard Oz, what with the consensus of the hive mind being very much the rule ...

A kind of MAGA world where simple truths get lost ...







Sorry, it was inevitable that the furious felon would be written into proceedings, but the pond accepts no responsibility, it was the grave Sexton blathering about vigorous intellectual and cultural diversity in the United States wot did it ...

Arguably, there's little appetite in the lizard Oz to have their views challenged. Why is that? Likely it's because the reptiles are so doctrinaire in their views that they can't tolerate hearing other views, particularly if they come from that hussy always Tingling away, or the recalcitrant ABC, or the Graudian, or whatever ...




It goes without saying that Sivaraman is collateral damage.

The moment he dared to scribble Why ABC chiefs should back Laura Tingle for calling out racism, he was a dead duck, a gone goose ...

That sort of heresy couldn't be tolerated, especially because he has a kinda funny name. Likely he's not even from the venerated Anglosphere of glorious Western Civilisation ...

Of course there's an irony in all this ... noted by the venerable Meade last Friday ... in her note, not racist, but also very racist ... featuring Sharri (disrespect)...






The sense of dislocation observing reptile la la land can be very acute, which is why the pond felt the need to isolate this particular contagion, and with relief, turned ot a last very short gobbet, deploring a race debate, which would seemingly mean deploring News Corp, Sky News and Sharri (disrespect) for introducing talk of an explosion of racism ... you know, not racist, but also very racist, go figure, but don't ask "Ned" to do the figuring ...




There's an attack on liberalism alright ... emanating from News Corp and its various branches of empire ... but when "Ned" got to talking about the rule of law, surely he jumped the shark and nuked the Faux Noise fridge ...







And with those done, celebrating the famous murder on fifth avenue, it was time to celebrate the justices who would be implementing the rule of law, thanks to TT ...






7 comments:

  1. As is usual when she goes off in one of her rants, Dame Slap reveals much more about herself than her subject de jour. worries about living in a racist society on Planet Janet? Why, just piss off to somewhere nicer. That’s how they changed things in Apartheid-era South Africa, Rhodesia, or the pre-Civil Rights south of the USA. Of course, it’s possible the Dame wouldn’t have considered those to be racist societies….. Still, it’s big of her to share her own migrant experience, and that of other white Reptiles (will the Caterist’s contribution follow tomorrow?). There’s certainly no doubt that she had it tough - imagine the embarrassment of your mum possibly being mistaken for a
    Kiwi by asking for “sex tomatoes “!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Is Dame Slap worried that Ms Ton-yee-nee is leading moves to make identity politics acceptable across reptile media again - when it has long been the Slap prerogative to restart such changes in the, um 'culture'. Whatever her motive, this Dame has tapped out a good example of identity politics, although it is also possible that she did not realise that, as she was scrabbling through the shoebox of old family 'snaps'.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I've had a reasonably relaxing Sunday, pottering around the house, avoiding unnecessary stressful situations (especially religious activities which tend to involve quite a lot of exhorting on this day of rest), catching up on late footy scores; and then it was shattered by the armageddon of Janet and Ned Sunday school.

    The best that I can make out of it all is that Australia is tearing itself apart, even though we are a successful fully integrated society, better than any other in the world; that the liberals and conservatives are heart to heart buddies, perhaps one and the same (even though liberals and conservatives are opposed to each other in most other countries); that the progressives are left and the far right are, well, right, and they are both baddies; that Laura Tingle has been very bad (again); and that Danes are far happier when they are here and not in Denmark.

    Sorry teach, that's the best I can make out of it all. Is it a pass? Can I wag off tomorrow? AG.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sadly AG you haven't shown sufficient empathy and understanding, so attendance will be required.

      As another correspondent suggested, being made to ask for sex tomatoes is vastly more humiliating and degrading than having your land stolen, being packed off to a mission to live on rations, trained in domestic duties for your white masters, and then having your children stolen so that they too could be trained as servants...

      You really should have mustered more sympathy for Dame Slap's tragic plight and tear-wrenching suffering as a child.

      No doubt the Caterist will offer you a chance to make good tomorrow, by giving you the chance to deplore renewables and call for the urgent nuking of the country to save the planet. Or perhaps you can volunteer to serve in the war on China ...

      Whatever, diligence is required. Remember, as our Henry would say, Ex nihilo nihil fit.

      Delete
    2. Reminds me of Sound of Music, nothing comes from nothing ... (and I only saw it once), oh well, back to school tomorrow. AG.

      Delete


  4. As the pond warned students that this afternoon's study would be difficult for all but experienced handlers, assistance was required. Clearly the RSPCA knowledge base was needed and notes had to be taken:

    "No form of handling your reptile should ever be taken lightly, as each restraint has some effect on their behaviour, life, or other activities. Confidence, knowledge - and often assistance - is required when handling them.

    Not only can reptiles hurt you (by biting and scratching), but you can also hurt them with careless handling.

    You also need to understand that reptiles usually hate being lifted up. While many will accept it, few will like it. It is a stressful event and the best way to reduce that stress is to handle them calmly, safely, and only for a short time."

    I began to see where Laura Tingle went wrong.

    "Depending on the animal's species various precautions need to be taken."

    Hmm. Perhaps that's what the ABC counselled Tingle to do?

    " Many monitors are potentially dangerous, capable of not only biting and scratching, but also using their long tail as a powerful whip."

    Sounds a lot like Dame Slap. Make a note to put a warning on the laboratory door. She's probably a blue-tailed monitor.

    The next advice suggested:

    "Be aware of autonomy - the ability of geckoes and skinks to drop their tail to distract a predator while the lizard escapes. Unfortunately, this sometimes happens when these animals are handled, particularly if lifted by their tail."

    So that might explain Paul Kelly's attempt to escape implicating himself by quoting everyone else. Make a note to avoid lifting this reptile by the tail.

    Nevertheless Kelly's antics can still produce laughter:

    "...the education sector and the universities are the originating cradle of progressive politics and its causes"

    which suggests that the originating cradle for conservative politics and its causes are a lack of education and higher study; in other words, ignorance!

    However, by the end of Kelly's article it wasn't clear if we were dealing with a gecko/skink or a short-necked turtle of the Emydura species which are quite mobile and can bite and which provide another problem with handling:

    "Another trap to be aware of - the glands at either end of the bridge (the shell between the upper and lower shells) can discharge a pungent fluid!".

    Ooops, too late! Make a note to handle carefully next time!

    https://kb.rspca.org.au/knowledge-base/how-do-i-safely-handle-my-reptile/

    https://www.australianreptileguide.com/monitors

    ReplyDelete
  5. So according to Ned, we are facing an attack on liberalism and the rule of law (sometimes known as the Golden Rule). To most of us, the Golden Rule means that he who has the gold makes the rules, and the rules are made in their interests.

    ReplyDelete

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