In which the pond is shocked and outraged at the impudence, neigh the downright cheekiness of the lickspittle lackeys at Nine ...

 

 

 

 

Just to follow up on Lloydie's story of the outrageous UN and their shocking behaviour in relation to dear sweet innocent coal, the pond was shocked and outraged that the Nine rags should lump this headline together with alleged talk of an alleged new company line ...

 

 

What an outrageous bald-faced lie.

For starters, there's no such thing as a single unified hive mind. 

Everyone knows that Chairman Rupert values the editorial independence and free-thinking ways of every one of his editors, and encourages them all to think outside the Murdochian box ...

Not one of them has to pay a whit or jot of attention to the company or any imagined corporate line.

These are old school newspaper people, of the Major Mitchell, Akker Dakker and Bolter kind. 

And then the wretches at Nine had the check to offer up a montage of pages, as if that proved anything ...

 

 

 

What a fraud. Not one mention of dear sweet fragrant clean innocent dinkum Oz coal, or the sort of Nimby behaviour of eastern suburbs toffs rightly targeted by the Daily Terrorist ...

 

 

 

 

Do the Nine gangsters and lickspittle lackeys really think that the finest in Australian journalism would turn on the dime at the whim of their master?

 

 

 

Oh it's only a two week campaign and it's to be fronted by that girlie man Joe? Look, the Nine lickspittle lackey gangsters showed his form with a snap of the girlie man surrounded by girlies ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ah, everyone will realise from the get go that it's just a cunning ploy, a cynical subterfuge ... as if anyone could doubt the Murdochians and their genuinely held beliefs ...

 

 

Not muzzle? As if the Bolter was some kind of hound that needed a muzzling? (Well outside SM play at least). But the Bolter has never denied global warming. The Bolter is an enthusiastic supporter of the science, neigh, the Bolter welcomes the science ...

 

 

 

 

Never mind, it seems after a couple of weeks of girlie Joe, we can get back to the right sort of front page, thanks be unto the Terror, the HUN and the Bolter  ...

 

 

Yes, Nine lickspittle lackeys, cop that ... everybody loves clean, dinkum, innocent coal, and want it to run wild and free ... how dare you suggest that they can just toss a coin and come down on the other side.

 

 

Say what? It's his spawn wot done the deed? No way that the fiercely independent thinkers at News Corpse will follow the spawn's party line.

Think of the Bolter, and indeed, at this point, the Nine lickspittle lackeys ran a snap of the Mornington Peninsula man ...

 

 

But how many times must the pond say it? The Bolter has never denied the science!

The Bolter is an enthusiastic supporter of climate change ...

 

 

 

 Yes, it's good for us, lickspittle Nine lackeys. 

Oh you won't find any denialism in the Bolter ... and it's mean of you to suggest that the Murdochians are craven and would want to clap along with SloMo as he lays his hands upon the planet and heals, or perhaps puts in a good word in tongues to his imaginary friend ...

 

Yes, yes, but the pond knows the real reason you've run with this story ... it's so you can pander to your Nimby mob with a "related article", which everyone knows means more bashing of the Chairman ...

No collusion, a corporate decision by the company? But these are proudly independent folk who don't blow with the wind, or blow a lot of wind, because they're against wind (and sun and what else have you got you bloody hippie greenie leftie preverts) ...

Next thing you'll be proposing that the Chairman is only motivated by his usual lust for greed and power ...

 

Ha, what's the bet the next trick will be to quote some pathetic dissident, as if there was a company line to dissent against, when everybody knows that News Corp resolutely refuses to drink the kool-aid and join the hive mind ...

And so to the most shocking line of all, the proposal that the Murdochians have listened to the readership and want to give the sheeple what they want ... clear evidence that no one in Nine has ever read the readership when on a climate science denialist jag below a Lloydie piece ...

Why this very day the readership was fired up and ready to nuke everything in sight, including but not limited to the UN ...

 

 

Where will these devoted readers go? What will hubbie say? But wait, they were only just beginning to warm up as they headed towards a c 1k of outraged comments ...

 

 

Will you tell the readership, or shall the pond, that in this case, as in many other matters, the credibility, legitimacy, authority and reputation of the coal-loving reptiles is at an all time high, and Boris will not be happy at being abandoned or betrayed, should treachery and treason be afoot ...

 

 

Oh to marvel at the sight of Dr Frankenstein's monster, and what's even better is to end the sampling on an it's ...

There's no way you can ruin this, wretched Nine lickspittle fellow travellers by talkingi of what the readership believe and want...

 

And now you're quoting an executive chairman, as if real journalists would toady up to the corporate line? Go on, admit it, it's just filler so you can get your readership to click on yet another "related article" ...

 

Well the pond's not having any of that guff. The pond is solid reptile, the reptiles are solid on beautiful green clean innocent Oz coal, and so is the pond ... and if the planet happens to be warming, why that's only for the general good ...

The Bolter has told the pond so, and all the pond and the readership can do is baah along ...

And so to a few nostalgic infallible Popes, celebrating the wit and wisdom of the times ...