In which the Major fails and falls at the first pond hurdle ...

And now a brief apologetic note on why the Major Mitchell didn’t make it into the pond this day.

You see, the Major fell at the first Aboriginal hurdle.

 Please allow the pond to quote from Creative Spirits here:

“Aborigine” 
‘Aborigine’ comes from the Latin words ‘ab’ meaning from and ‘origine’ meaning beginning or origin. It expresses that Aboriginal people have been there from the beginning of time. ‘Aborigine’ is a noun for an Aboriginal person (male or female). The media, which is still using this name, has been called on to abandon using ‘Aborigine’ because its use has “negative effects on Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples’ self-esteem and mental health” 

See the original for the footnotes, but the pond can understand this.

‘Aborigine’ carries a huge load of unwanted cultural abuse on its back …

But is the alternative “Aboriginal”, as deployed by the Major and the lizards of Oz, a good replacement?

Can an adjective do the work of a noun? Back to Creative Spirits:

Aboriginal is an adjective and used to describe ‘Aboriginal people’, ‘Aboriginal houses’ or an ‘Aboriginal viewpoint’. 
Some sources use it as a noun which I and many other people think is wrong. 
‘Aboriginal’ is often written with a capital ‘A’ to show respect to Aboriginal people but also to differentiate Australian Aboriginal people from the aboriginal people all over the world. 
Using ‘Aboriginal people’ or ‘Aboriginal person’ has been recommended by the Aboriginal Advisory Group of Community Legal Centres NSW because they are “more positive and empowering terms”. 
If you want to be exact you would need to talk about “Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people” because people from the Torres Strait identify strongly with their islands. 

Well yes, never the dangling adjective, always as a modifier, as in 'Aboriginal people' (and there’s more at the link above).

The pond doesn't like being a grammar Nazi, but the pond is old-fashioned enough to think that an adjective shouldn’t be paid to do the work of a noun, no matter the amount of overtime involved, with overtime rare enough in the gig economy.

The reason "Aboriginal" is used in that offensive dangling way is that it’s the sort of mealy-mouthed, half-baked way that certain journalists  employ ... as a way of avoiding using "Aborigine" and thereby offending Aboriginal people.

But using one word incorrectly to replace another word that might be perceived as offensive is also pretty offensive.

How difficult would it have been for the Major and the lizards of Oz to have led with ABC misreads many Aboriginal people?

Then they could have rabbited on about how "Too often journalists on the left seem unaware of the use of 'Aboriginal' and 'Aborigines'".

Instead it's left to ratbag institutions of the ABC kind to use this form of words, as in this randomly plucked example:

There, that's not hard, not too hard at all, and Creative Spirits has other useful suggestions at the link.

Damn you ABC, damn you and your liberal kind to hell.

The Major and his lizard cohort did try to change the tone, as can be seen in the google splash:

But it was too late for the pond. It would have spent the entire piece thinking that the Major was a fuckwit, without the first clue.

Empowerment is the real issue?

Don't get the pond started on "real issue". What the fuck is an "unreal issue"?

It's such a lazy, sloppy use of words, to scribble about "real issues", typical of the penny a word school of mindless journalism.

But back to empowerment.

How about asking Aboriginal people how they’d like to be addressed, and what they think of adjectives doing the work of nouns?

Wouldn't that be empowering? Creative Spirits is happy to offer a view.

Some Aboriginal people would likely join the pond in assuring you that, on an average day, the Major looks and sounds as silly and as arrogant as Humpty Dumpty, without beginning to wonder if he pays his adjectives at time and a half ...

And now, rather than ending with Humpty himself - the pond has rather overdone good old Humpty over the years - how about a cartoon?