In which the pond observes the return of the Messiah to his Terrorist stronghold ...

Blink, and you'd miss the onion munching mad monk's front page appearance on the lizard Oz, tucked as it was down at the bottom on the left of the tree killing rag.

Couldn't they at least have tucked him to the right?

Every so often the pond regrets that its turf is the loon, right wing species, but it means, just like Troy Bramston, who drew the short straw for the reptiles, attention must be paid to the narcissist, attention-seeking, petulant failure, still dreaming of a return to the top job ... still doing his best to undermine Malware ... still proving to Cory that pissing inside the tent is much more fun than stepping outside the tent and going a discreet distance ...

Troy did his best to keep it short and sweet, and with just a few clips from one of the sources of the ruction ...

It's just more of the onion munching climate denialism bleating common to the species, but it gets particularly rich when the onion muncher turns to attacking Malware for not living in Kirribilli ...

The onion muncher is famous for never having lived in the Lodge, like a number of other leaders, and with the excuse of renovations. He was also the first since Scullin never to actually use the place.

It's all there in Renovations complete but Tony Abbott set to miss the Lodge, and even better, as we speak of costs, that Abbott shunned a Forrest $3000 a week home which was rented by cardigan wearers for the PM, and cost $120,000 in rent and lease termination fees.

On the other hand, Malware followed Ming the Merciless into the Lodge, and even spent a tasty pile of his own cash adding a few finishing touches ...

It must especially gall Abbott that Malware moved in to the Lodge, a place denied him, while ignoring the onion muncher's pet palace with harbour views, and so all he's got is some petulant foot-stomping about Kirribilli House left to him ...

The coverage suggests that at least with the reptiles of Oz, the onion munching mad monk is just a summer blowfly heading into autumn ... after all, there's nothing new here, just more of the usual, and with much the same point, doing damage to Malware ...

Not so the Terror, with the Terrorists getting wildly excited and giving the onion muncher the full Terrorist front page treatment ...

Tone nation, as in our fit and manly and Tone bodies? Sleek and svelte?

Oh it was possible to feel the surge of excitement in the Terrorist loins ... especially with that talk of "Labor lite" ...

As for the actual coverage, the pond was delighted to see that we're in for a photo-led recovery.

Just as there are endless snaps of the Donald, so the Terrorists decided that the story needed a lift with hagiographic snaps of the onion muncher ...

At first the coverage was circumspect, with due attention paid to promoting the Bolter and Sky News ...

But then came a link to a full transcript of the words of the infinitely wise and inspirational one, so that humble penitents might fossick through them for golden insights and understandings and paths to follow.

And then came a flurry of floozies, or at least a flurry of photos ...

Now one snap might confirm we're talking about Abbott - revealing the poor thing had been off at the Sydney Repair Centre - and a cropped close up might confirm it, though we no longer could discover that the mad clock had to be taken to the Sydney Repair Centre - but a third photo of the mad monk was surely a little surplus to needs, requirements or even modesty and good taste ...

It was the excess of snaps that hinted at the desperation ...

The next burst offered even more photos, since in the end, what Abbott had to say was limited, and to pump up the volume and the sense of meaningful content, the Terrorists had to keep on playing the photo card ...

No doubt the Terrorists thought that grin an engaging way of defeating the pensive Hansonists ... the photo of Hanson being the sort of snap that shows why a thinking person would vote for One Nation ...

      

Then came only one snap - though it pitted the pit-bull north shore warrior against the the eastern suburbs harbourside mansions fop - and a goodly gobbet of text, with a winning phrase ...

Of course the winning phrase, from a failed trainee priest who prefers the science of transubstantiation to actual science, was that reference to "climate change theology" ...

As soon as the pond hears that sort of nonsense, it reaches for its climate denialist gun ...

The clueless onion muncher once more confirms why he's tone deaf in his stupidity.

The next gobbet must perforce be brief, and the pond excluded a Terrorist plea for people to sign up to their coverage, because that would ensure innocents had their email bins filled to the brim with spam ...

Now it says something about the mad onion muncher that he should fixate on Hong Kong's housing prices. He might have mentioned London, he might have mentioned New York, he might have noted that Sydney long has had aspirations to be considered a world city, he might have noted some of the reasons for the house price boom, including and not limited to the coalition pandering to investors and state governments clambering into bed with speculators and developers and living off the stamp duty proceeds ...

But he preferred Hong Kong, and it's easy to see why the images of coolies fighting for a place in the sun worked as a dog whistle. Cue the Terrorists returning to the age old fear of Asian living standards with a compelling snap ...

Dog whistle complete - though Hong Kong looked quite grand in the snap - naturally the talk turned to the Murdochians as gossip mongers, and then the mad monk turns around and says he's in favour of renewables, because turning on a dime has always been one of his best political skills ...

And so to the final flourish in the Terrorist coverage, and it's a beauty.

The canny reptiles saved their best for last, with a stunning photo of a beatific onion muncher leading off the last gobbet ...

Well the pond thought that last photo very unsettling and vaguely demonic, with the portrait actually suggesting that beneath the marble mask there surged a seething neurotic attention seeker ...

      

But that's enough of delusions of grandeur and memories of lost times and past follies and abject failures, and the pond does apologise for dragging Rodin and Julius Caesar into the proceedings ...

Damn those secularists and polytheists ... perhaps this would have been a better comparison ...

     

Now there's two great climate scientists in action ...

Never mind, how about a little Scott Fitzgerald, available in full at the good folk of adelaide.edu.au here, to wrap up the Terrorist coverage and summarise the latest outburst by the attention-seeking narcissist ...

..And as I sat there brooding on the old, unknown world, I thought of the onion muncher’s wonder when he first picked out the green light glistening on the harbour at the end of Kirribilli House’s dock. He had come a long way to this blue lawn and this ecstatic vision of night harbour lights and sparkling emerald water that even a Whiteley couldn't capture, and his dream of glorious rule and eternal plebeian admiration must have seemed so close that he could hardly fail to grasp it. 

He did not know that it was already behind him, somewhere back in that vast obscurity beyond the city, where the dark fields of the colonial monarchy rolled on under the night. 

The onion muncher believed in the green light, the emerald city dreaming, the love of the common folk, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter — to-morrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther, regain the crown so brutally snatched from the anointed head . . . And one fine morning —— 

So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

And so to Rowe reminding the pond of the real work that rough hewn eastern suburbs types must perform before sharing a drop of Beenleigh rum with old Garth ...

Oh it's thirsty work fucking over and fleecing the poorest and the weakest in the work force ...

Good on you Reg, and please, share another drop with David Rowe here ...