In which the pond mourns the Bowling Green Massacre and the Oreo's part in it ...

And in that spirit, the pond naturally turns to the Oreo for more slaughter ...

Thankful? Ungrateful?

Yes, it's the language of children, even though the pond was taught that there should come a time to put away childish things ...

It was only the reptiles deep love of whimsy and irony that can explain why they put the Oreo cheek by jowl with some wretch blathering on about the Ukraine ...

Oh please Mr Romaniw, take a lesson from the Oreo. 

Ukrainians should be incredibly grateful to the Donald ...

Not like that dreadful Malware Trumble...

Come on Malware, listen to the Oreo, the least you can do is give the Donald a gift ...

But now, the moment long delayed, the pond must turn to the actual Oreo piece ...

Now everybody and his dog and SNL have provided transcripts of the phone call - this means war - and it's a measure of how far civilisation has declined that some should see the worst call by far as the work of a low-rent bully ...

This far in, thanks to the Oreo, the pond was already riven and shattered by the enormous sacrifices that the Donald was making for ungrateful Australians ...

It was no doubt time to move on to a rich, ripe serve of Oreo paranoia, hysteria and outrage about subversives and Islamics ...

It's like every Monday is a birthday for the pond ...

After that treat, it's probably time to hide under the bed, for fear that the subversives, the great enemies of Western Civilisation - it goes without saying that the Donald and the Oreo are extraordinary exemplars of all that's good and just and true - might triumph, and the invading hordes ruin the march of civilisation ...

See, what a fine march ...

And so to the Oreo ...

Indeed, indeed. It's shocking that some would suggest that Trump is unstable and unpredictable ... and perhaps even more barking mad than an Oreo ...

Each day the pond checks the twitter feed for further signs of stability and predictability and is always rewarded ...

Now please, no intemperate outbursts about America's three pillars, an independent judiciary and all the rest of the jibber jabber ...

Instead the pond would prefer to admire the way the Donald is A MODEL OF CONSISTENCY ...

It's extraordinarily depressing to follow that link to the Executive Order here ... it goes on and on and endlessly on, as if somebody's sat down and determined to bore everyone with their thoroughness. 

How much better it is to write something loosely worded, short and punchy - a few pars you can fit on a page so it can be shown with a flourish, as you would on reality TV - and delivered in a way that'll create confusion, chaos and discontent around the land and across the world ...

Surely that's the best way to provide stability and predictability of the sort so admired by the Oreo ...

Sure, she's got it ... until that fundamentalist Xian and deluded originalist takes his chair, and returns the world to original slavery ...