In which Dame Slap is baaack, with the usual righteousness, triumphalism and logic ...

The pond thought that only the heaviest memes would do to evoke the enormity of the return ...

Yes, as bedraggled souls return to the disreputable ABC, and beasts slouch towards Bethlehem, and politicians return to Canberra, and the summer bliss of elysian hedonism and record temperatures gives way talk of climate science as a way of introducing world government on the sly, Dame Slap is back ...

She's baaack, a wonder woman guest starring death stroke, and in the lizard Oz, we can hear her scream in a bobbysoxer kind of way ...

 

The result is one of those fine flurries of scribbled in a flush enthusiasm that when re-read produce cringeworthy moments.

We've all had them - a diary entry on the hunk down the road, climate science as the path to world government - though of course such is the lack of irony in the Dame, the lack of self-awareness, the self-centredness of the Gefühl der Richtigkeit that none of this ever penetrates the thick hide, the impervious ear ...

Still, it means that in a year's time, it will be possible to return and do a compare and contrast, and what happened after the high passed ... just as the relevance of aliens not being able to scream becomes apparent in the header ...

Simple as that?

For a moron mebbe, and even then, the pond might be slandering the moronic. After all, if even the pond can get that Dame Slap is stupid, maybe others can too ...

Of course when your only contact with the natives is by way of the usual tourist points, the distortions are remarkable, not just in the lack of awareness of the natives, but a lack of awareness of self as a tourist.

Meanwhile, in Manhattan, let the record show that the vote went 58,935 for Trump and 515,481 for another person (see the NY Times here for the full gory details).

Some sample, some Dame ...

Why does it matter?

Why does someone scribbling something so fatuous and stupid as "three for three in my favour tells its own crazy story", telling as it does of someone crazy to the point of barking mad, howling at the moon ... why does this entrance the pond?

Why in its own way it's to be as barking mad as the Dame and the reptiles of Oz.

It's as simple as scribbling "simple as that" and thinking, in a simplistic, simpleton, nay moronic way, that it is as simple as that ... and there will be no unintended consequences, unexpected blowbacks and the world haring off in another direction entirely ...

But that's the sublime charm of a teenage infatuation ... you know, the scribbling in diaries, the writing of letters to the world ... (though what a pity that The Edge of Seventeen, which boasts an under-used Woody Harrelson in fine form and a good performance from the too old Hailee Steinfeld has to end in such a conventional and predictable and enervating way) ...

Never mind, on with the letter ,,,

Journalists should keep their mouths shut?

Then why is Dame Slap jibbering and jabbering and spluttering and foaming and frothing, the flecking staining her lips? Here's how keeping the mouth shut is done ...

As for Turkey ... if it's such a worry ... why wasn't it on the list?

Well the reason's clear enough, except for someone as sublimely silly and stupid as the Dame ...

(here)

But that's the charm of the addle-pated harebrain, their sublime incapacity and inability to make any sense at all ...

Now to just pluck one example out of the quagmire of not keeping her mouth shut, that talk of Trump getting a standing ovation and being cheered during his speech should be marked - at least by an intelligent journalist - as being open to doubt, given that the Donald brought his own cheer squad along to mingle with the CIA (Snopes the dispute here).

An intelligent commentator would preserve a little distance, pretend a little objectivity, but the Dame is in fact just a cheer leader in a bimbo cheer squad ...

It makes it all the more bizarre that she then goes on to blather about how it's incumbent on the media to do a better job ...

Instead of lambasting upper west side poetry groups, how about looking at what the Donald is doing, and what, in its wayward threshing about, his administration is achieving ... like, you know, the chaos ...

To the pond, it looks like a country being reduced to impotence and civil war ...

No, he didn't win the popular vote, unless you happen to believe the Donald and his claims that the entire system is rigged, and corrupt and profoundly undemocratic ... in which case, talk of the privacy of the ballot box produces the hollowest laugh of all ...

Never mind, return in a year's time, and let's see what the Donald has wrought and let's see where Dame Slap's euphoria has left the world ... but the pond is happy to bet that, whatever happens, however much the record temperatures keep going, or the weather acts strangely, Dame Slap will remain, like many a coming of age picture, completely clueless ...

And now, while it's almost a waste and a tragedy to put them in the same company, the Pope has at last returned from his holydays to give us a blessing (and more blessings here) ...

Or as Colber might put it ...

... while David Rowe has also honoured the world with another cartoon, and more honorings here ...