In which the pond does a bait and switch from ethno porn Stewart to our sweet Gracie ...

The pond had at first thought of checking in with reptile Stewart on the Donald's progress ...

The dear lad seemed to be offering that weird kind of reptile porn, a bit like National Geographic porn, sort of ethnographic porn, which sees an intrepid reptile head off into the donga and speak to the natives ...

Hundreds of reptiles have been writing hundreds of profiles of the Donald's hundred first days, but the trick is to give it a little local relevance, a kind of 'Épater la bourgeoisie' which will shock the elite readers of the lizard Oz, and yet produce a welling of empathy for those outside this illustrious, elite crowd ...

Stewart conjured the mood nicely in his twittering to promote his piece ...

  

There's nothing excites a reptile so much as a feisty start - never mind the fuck-ups - and the smell of coal in the morning. Beats napalm hands down...

And there's the trick in a nutshell. Go off and talk to some dumb fuck, because gosh gee, he's an authentic dumb hillbilly coal and gun-loving dumb fuck, with a fear of commies but not the Ruskis, not now that Vlad's such a decent, friendly, Donald-loving, god-fearing dictator ...

Of course you quickly skedaddle for home after spending a little time talking to the hillbillies - Stewart likes to sign himself as reporting from Washington, dangerous home of know-it-all 'leets - but once you've done your ethno porn tour, you've got enough material to rabbit on endlessly about dangerous elites, balanced by the notion that the Donald has pulled the wool over the eyes of these pathetic hillbillies ...

The trouble is, Stewart takes himself and his blathering seriously, and he goes on endlessly, like a nattering "Ned" in training ...

That's how he ended his piece, and you can see how he tweaks the natives to his purpose, much like the Donald himself. It'll be market forces that dictate the future of coal, because climate science is just a dream ... you know the same way market forces will sort out health and income tax and such like for the rich ...

Before that market-driven closing, Stewart was full-on into his ethnographic porn, daring to walk amongst the natives and even talk to a few of them ...

Oh they're so quaint, and yet so loveable, and yet their views on climate science are so worth quoting ...

You can get the same effect, and much the same impact, by moving amongst creationists dedicated to explaining how dinosaurs were in the Garden of Eden, or angry Sydney Anglicans explaining how Eve means there should be complimentary women ...

There's disbelief, and yet there's something strangely appealing, attractive, almost compelling to the angry old white 'lizard of Oz' reader in these eccentricities ...

But the pond got very tired of all this ethno porn, and decided - since the tired fourth season of Silicon Valley is upon us - to do a quick pivot.

You see, our Gracie has delivered a humdinger this day, so why not a bait and switch? 

Promise ethno porn of an American kind, and deliver some great dinki di Gracie ethno porn instead ...because she is not some sheltered reptile working for the Murdochian dollar, she can sing the song of the workers ...

Yes, our Gracie can do stunning comedy ...

Now it's true that our Gracie's comedy song could be summed up pretty quickly ...

  

But there's a special pleasure in listening to our Gracie deliver the song ...

Indeed, indeed, the pond wishes millennials good luck as our Gracie says hello to affordable housing, Gracie style ...

It struck the pond initially as some kind of comedy sketch. The mocking of education, the celebration of gardener Paulie, and the worship of Dandenong, home for nongs of the Gracie kind ...

That mention of oak-leaf hydrangeas was a final poignant touch ... a reminder of how our Gracie did it tough ...

By golly, she's a trouper ...

But the show didn't end there. There was much more to come ...

Always pleased to serve, the pond is only too happy to provide a link to that Flinders Street property for a cool $169k here ...

Perhaps here the pond should note that it has a dog box out the back for a humble $100k, and any prospective buyer should be aware they can use the outdoor toilet, the laundry, and the garden hose for a brisk shower ... It's currently under inspection by a dog, but the pond is happy to strata title it for some all-day sucker ...remember, a cold water shower early in the morning in winter is the only genuine way to be admitted in to Our Gracie's Just Harden The Fuck Up Club ...

As for the rest, what to say? Our Gracie is so far up herself and the right to screw people in her love of the common folk that the pond was inordinately pleased it had made mention of the Donald ...

The cartoonists have also been busy celebrating the Donald's easy peasy reign, and at least the show could wrap up with a couple of Rowe cartoons, with more Rowe here ...