In which Barners' cuisine reigns supreme ...

The pond deeply appreciates the valiant attempts of the onion muncher to change the topic back to him … but how cheeky is it for the Terror to report on the onion muncher's epic doings before he's even managed to do it?

"Set to"? 

He's been setting to since the moment he promised, in those immortal words, no wrecking, no undermining, no sniping, no backbiting, no bitching, no sledging, no good humoured banter, no frumious bandersnatching, no insults, no verbal intimidation, no backhanders, no invective, and certainly no flyting...

Still, the pond appreciates the effort.

Frankly, it's gone way too far when the pond turns on John Oliver and is confronted by Barners and Johnny Depp's dogs, and a reminder that Barners is up there with South African presidents and Netanyahu as a fitting subject for comedy …

Oliver has a fondness for Barners, as a way of expressing fear and loathing of down under types ...

Meanwhile, Barners has skulked off to Fairfax to talk in Trumpian terms of a witch hunt, though as a traditionalist, the pond would probably prefer warlock hunt, or oath breaker hunt or if push come to shove, a sorcerer hunt, given the way that Barners has now bewitched the entire world …

But all is not lost for Malware, as this day the bromancer, his love of the onion muncher forgotten with his recent deep infatuation with the Donald, chips in and lends a hand, or at least a keyboard …

Yes, while the nanny staters were getting agitated and twisting their cardigans in knots, as in Media Watch here ...

...under Turnbull’s clean sheets policy, if a minister is caught with his pants down, it’s a sackable offence. 
Which means the private sex lives of government ministers will now be very much a matter of public interest. And the media could be reporting on it constantly.

… the bromancer was on hand with a most useful analogy as a way of steering the troubled ship of state away from assorted icebergs …

Indeed, indeed, no one would accuse DFAT of being conservative. These days, it is deeply, subversively leftist, a perverted stinking morass of commie defeatists and insurgents … or so the lizard Oz decided when it decided to re-reun Higgie of the Speccie mob …

Where do they dig up that sort of cartoon from? Was 'lacto vegetarian' a joke back in the 1950s?

These hipsters and their retro post-modernist canapé and toupée ironies, in a style which would have been seen as out of date in an ancient Punch or Man magazine …

Oh well, while the jokes are flying, and to keep Barners in the spotlight, here's a reminder … though if it gets taken down, don't blame the pond for the blank hole ...

And now …

… where was the pond?

Ah that's right, somewhere lost upon the rotting sea, and the rotting deck, where the ministerial penises lay, and water everywhere and how the boards did shrink, water everywhere, nor any a drop to drink … (recite away here).

Set a course bromancer, set a course to steady the ship …

Steady on bromancer, it's heroic Barners you're talking about … valiant traditionalist and friend of Gina …

"I’ve been in heaps of fights in my political life, this is another one, in any person’s political career you aren’t created by the times in your favour, you’re tempered by the times of adversity. That’s how politics works - you rise to deal with it," he said. 
"I am humbled by the support in my electorate and in the community. People are starting to see this as a witch hunt. I’m not going anywhere, I never would."

Yes for all the romancer's talk of the military and diplomats, Barners has done absolutely nothing wrong, and in his humble way, he's humbled by the support he's received, and by the way he's yet again proven to be a celebrity on the TV comedy show circuit …

And what's more, for those of us who love to watch, what fun it's going to be when someone decides to dob in another pollie for indulging in the jolly ...

And let us not forget what a boon Barners is for cartoonists too … with Rowe still enjoying the fun, and more fun-filled Rowe here …

And what a lot of watching there is left to do, for voyeurs such as the pond …