Losers take power?
NZ shock?
Yep, the reptiles were having their Hillary Democrat moment ... and they kept it up in the digital edition with exactly the same bizarre use of the English language...
The pond has to congratulate Ean Higgins and Primrose Riordan, not just for the notion that losers take power, but for the way in the very first line they slipped in "socialist-leaning."
Where were they when the Donald won? Yes, he won, and the reptiles never ran with USA shock: loser takes power thanks to weird electoral college ...
At least the Oz editorialist tried on a little history, with dire implicit threat of doom ...
Now the pond doesn't actually much mind or care what happens in New Zealand, though it loves the Kiwi accent to death and could spend endless hours talking of fush and chups ...
But naturally the pond turned to the bromancer to understand what happened, and why the reptiles were suffering such a bitter aftertaste from a vanilla poll ...
Naturally she won?
But she lost. That's what the Oz said ...
How could this be? The front page of the lizard Oz had assured the pond that she was a loser, in much the same way that the Donald lost, and that black is white, except on the odd occasion when white is black ...
Hillary Clinton was a winner, but lost?
And now for the pronouncement of doom and gloom ... though the pond can't recall the reptiles getting so agitated about the Donald getting the gig ...
Julie Bishop is ludicrous?
The reptiles really know how to turn the pond's world upside down. Even an NZ election can turn into an epic mindfuck of alternative realities ... and speaking of which, naturally the bouffant one was on hand to deliver more confusion to the pond.
With the Donald already having struck it down, what's the first thing a reptile would reach for to pluck from the reach of the new socialist leaner? The cat? The family photographs? Some other treasured heirloom? Fush and chups? An improvement in your ludicrous manners?
Actually it's none of these things, because after much huffing and puffing, the best that the bouffant one can do is reach for the TTP, such a thriving, surging, energy-charged trade negotiation ...
In reality, even the trade pact is such a tedious irrelevance, such a storm in a Tasman sea teacup, that the bouffant one could only manage a few pars for his beat-up ...
And since the pond is congratulating winners this day, surely the bouffant one must score the Seinfeld award for the best column about nothing.
It should fit nicely alongside the loser cup that the pond has awarded to winners Ean Higgins and Primrose Riordan.
Yes losers can be winners, and winners, by definition, are always losers ... or so Pyrrhus of Epirus assures the pond ...
And now, since in truth talking about fush and chups is usually a short affair, there's just time to drop in on some real losers and dropkicks ...
It took a little time for the penny to drop and for the losers to realise that they were the winners of an ancient scheme ...
And so the reptiles maintain the rage and keep the usual dropkick coal-loving climate denialists close to their sooty bosom ...
Unless it's coal-fired business as usual, the luddites will never be happy ...
Let the pricing begin, and that way the winners are certain to be losers, unless losing is winning ... and carbon will be priced out of the marketplace ... though the pond hesitates to call it a price on carbon, even though carbon will end up being priced ...
Which brings the pond to the Pope of the day, with more infallible Popery here ...
The pond's first car was an FX and it's pleasing to see that the Pope has drawn the right grille ...and he's also evoked the mindset of the likes of Craig Kelly and George Christensen, stuck in the 1950s, while back in the actual 1950s they preferred to looked forward to the future ...
We could have done the same in the new millennium, and looked to electric cars and future ways of doing things ... instead, the winners wanted to be losers ...
"The pond's first car was an FX..."
ReplyDeleteOh wau, DP, much envy. My first was a 1954 Morris Minor sidevalve series II which I bought in 1961 at the cost of 265 pounds (my entire fortune at the time).
When did you buy your FX and, if it's not too rude a question, for how much ?
I bought a 49'er in about 1967 for 15 quid. (It was after decimalisation so I had to actually hand over $30) A little later I hit a bump and it fell in half - a bit of a rust problem. I sold it for parts and doubled my money.
DeleteWell it wouldn't have done you much good trying to complain to Larry Hartnett about the quality of his cars if you made a profit, then. And Joe Ben Chifley was long dead by then.
DeleteIt was done within the family GB, not true market value, it was something like fifty quid, but then it had rust in the floor so rich you could see the tar, always jumped out of third, needed the driver's side door to be held shut while keeping the gear lever in place, disconnected the exhaust pipe at a bump so it sounded like a flock of Harleys, and had windscreen washers that meant the car should be parked during a sprinkle. Oh and the seals leaked everywhere ...
DeleteIt was a great car and the pond misses it terribly to this day ... the engine went off eventually to run a pump, but had never wavered up to that sad, tragic moment ... unfortunately the body by then was beyond salvage ...
Sounds like you and Rod (above) had similar experiences, DP. Seems like a perfect Aussie outback car. My Morrie, by comparison, was just wonderful - hardly ever even a minor problem and it ran for quite a few years - I kinda miss it too.
DeleteThe Bromancer: "English, alas, was his John Brumby ... falling just one seat short of a majority."
ReplyDeleteNow let me see: 120 seats; required for a majority, 61 seats; NZ Nationals 56 seats plus 1 ACT seat = 57. 61 - 57 = 4.
Do you think the Bromancer failed school arithmetic tests and will Broady Boy Donners be on his case for letting down the Australian education level ?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Zealand_general_election,_2017
Is this the sickest most vile headline ever? From this morning's Australian "Keating urges Vic MPs to kill Die bill"
ReplyDeleteDie Bill, Die !
DeleteOptus?
DeleteYair, them too.
DeleteOver the dutch, losers are winners; here, they're sore. All very novel and unexpected. Who ever heard of a coalition forming government anyway? In such uncertain times, one seeks certainty and consistency. The Bromancer is our man, certain to be wrong, consistently stupid.
ReplyDeleteThe Oz has outshone itself with the P1 header. Not even Rupe and the ghosts of Gough and Khemlani (hope he's not still kickin') could deny that.
ReplyDeleteThe Bromancer's shit-chuck is about as edifying as Malcolm Turnbull's election night spit.
ReplyDeleteGreg says Ardern's a political infant, but she has been active in politics for 20 years, getting her start at an age when Sheridan was falling in love with a young catholic boxer named Tony. She's been in parliament for as long as Rudd or Shorten had been when they became leaders, and far longer than Truffles. In between she was an advisor to Helen Clarke and Tony Blair, so she's been sitting at the grownups table for a long time.
And New Zealand's MMR system is similar to that used by several countries (and sub-national constituancies), most notably Germany. Where was the Bromancer when the Pommeranian Grenadier won her fourth term as Chancellor? Seems to me to be an excellent way of ensuring a balance between a working majority and minor party representation.
About the only thing they got right, ironically, was the "socialist-leaning". While that's a dog whistle used for anyone to the left of Corey Bernardi, its actually true in her case. In 2008, she was elected President of the International Union of Socialist Youth. And that's why Sheridan thinks she's a "loser". Can't have our ANZAC mates being all progressive and feminist and environmentally and socially responsible. People here might get the idea that's a good thing.
Sounds like maybe we should see if she'd migrate across the pond, FD. She sounds a lot better than any of our locals.
DeleteAbsolutely scorching response FrankD. The sort of response one imagines emanating from an editor should the Australian ever decide to employ one.
ReplyDeleteImagine - fact-checking, dull repetitions banned - my toea are tingling at the prospect!