In which the pond prepares for a rough time, with nattering "Ned" and the Major showing why ...

 

 

 

It's going to be a difficult and tedious time for the pond for the next few weeks as the reptiles swing into action in their role as the government's Pravda, pumping out the propaganda, with all hands on deck ...

Forgive the pond if it surveys the scene, catching a moment in reptile time, with nattering "Ned" at the top of the digital page, ma ... 

 

 

 

What's with "Unknown" Albanese?

At the time of his election, the reptiles were very keen to paint him as an aged warrior, up there with Arthur Calwell in terms of being an antique, and worst of all, with a taste for Billy Bragg. 

More of that "unknown" riff anon, but in the meantime, look at the media pile-on, with simpleton Simon sublimely unaware of any conflict of interest ...

 

 

 

 

Of course Major Mitchell was to hand, holding the liar from the Shire's hand, but it was the same in the commentary section.

They even distracted simplistic Sharri from her important scoops on Wuhan ... 

 

 

 

Investigations editor? So now it's an "investigation" to investigate "lethal" attacks that are only  marginal?

No wonder the reptiles couldn't find room at the inn early in the morning for a truly disgraceful bit of bigotry from the Caterist, promptly despatched by the pond to a late arvo slot where least harm might be done ...

But it was the reptiles tree killer edition that took the cake...

 

 

 

 

The ultimate test of character? That's to pretend that the liar from the Shire has an actual character to be tested, as opposed to yet another marketing campaign to be launched.

But the pond can defer no longer, and out of a host of platitude-deliverers, as always the pond turned to the aged master of the art ...

 

 

 

 

The pond realises that "unknown" is the best angle that they've got at the moment, and perhaps that's why they didn't even deploy inverted commas ... even though "Ned" himself, way back in 2019, did his best to make the "unknown" Albo known, replete with a classic bit of cult nostalgia from the long gone cult master himself ...

 

 

 

 

 

Enough already. The pond knows that the reptiles have won the climate science denialist war, and that the planet is fucked, and not just because of the sociopath from Russia, deviant Xi, and the Hindu fundamentalists of India ... we can proudly hold our heads high for fellow traveling in such rich company.

 

Now back to current "Ned" doing his best for the liar from the Shire ... 

 

 

 

The biggest intelligence test? Of course, it takes sublime reptile intelligence to ignore climate science and jump aboard the coal lover ...

Way back when, "Ned" knew that the "unknown unknown" was actually pretty known, and walking a dangerous path back to the centre, which is to say, trying to keep News Corp's serpents' fangs away from his arm  ...

 

 

 

Yes, yes, but since then he's gone through a makeover, and that's why he's completely "unknown", and to prove it the reptiles gave "Ned" a snap showing a grim-looking "unknown" ...

 

 

 

 

 

Now the pond could keep on going back to remind the reptiles that they knew the "known known" way back when, but the reptiles have been busy stacking "Ned's" piece with click bait videos, carefully neutered by the pond, and this, in the manner and style of "Ned" is turning into a long ramble ... so it's on with the show ...

 

 

 

John Barilaro in that click-bait video? Yep, it's going to be a long and grueling campaign, especially as the thought of "Ned" reading his own words seems to have become a lost dream ... 

Instead "Ned" was given a click bait video offering a very clear choice ...

 

 

 

 

Oh there are going to be endless attacks on independents and the "unknown" Albo, and much about how knowing that the liar from the Shire is an inveterate liar is a good reason for voting him, the ultimate test of character as it were, but already the pond was bored, especially as the reptiles managed to cram in yet another click bait video at the end of "Ned's" piece ...

 

 

 

 

"Daily scrutiny"? Is that what the reptiles are calling their daily assaults? 

And so to the Major, offering yet another in what will be endless weeks of daily assaults ... and being a strongly religious man, the Major was offering a miracle ...

 

 

Indeed, indeed. Talk about an over-reaction, when the Major knows the only proper response is to trash renegade conservatives - so yesterday - because there's always another ratbag eagerly waiting in the wings, and it's come on down Jimbo Molan, as tired a re-heating as when the pond resorts to baked beans on toast ...

 

 

Say what? The mango Mussolini lost? Why that's the first the pond has heard of it - will the Major be wiring the news to Faux Noise and the GOP? - and just to prove the point that the Major's heart remains with dropkicks, at this point the reptiles inserted a snap of long-suffering Pauline ...

 

 

Enough of that. Back to the Major sharing his love of orange ...

 

 

Good old Cameron. He's going to be quoted in the lizard Oz until the cows come home, or the liar from the Shire romps in, though the Major has also added John Black to his list of helpful enablers ...

By this point the pond had already had more than enough, but the Major was ready for his miracle ... 

Yes, the reptiles will do their very best, and who knows, they might just pull it off, and meanwhile the pond regrets to note that even the immortal Rowe has been infected by election fever and media coverage ...

 

Go Scotty, the reptiles are right behind you ... get that lump of coal over the finish line ...