In which the pond wonders if the Oreo might be ready for Chinese values ...

The temptation for lunchtime is to have easy fun, such as Barners refusing to release a report, never mind the cost, or to marvel at the way the coalition can't agree on a budget for the plebiscite, and that's before they even get on to the wording of the question.

But that bunfight could run for weeks, for months, for years ... with plenty of time for the pond to join in and all the usual suspects on show ... such as Kevin from Tasmania here to help, and Erica the constantly outraged egged on by the angry Sydney Anglicans, who have never been averse to sticking their snouts in taxpayer-funded troughs ... 

Of course way back when, everybody made their views known - without benefit of full to overflowing intertubes or cash in interest groups paws - and dropped their white feathers in the post, or thought white feathers were naff and cruel, and voted ...

But not these days, and the onion muncher's out and about and making mischief and the ABC joked about lycra-clad pleas for funding ...

It's a full-on circus, and we haven't even got in the car to get to the circus ...

But the pond is made of sterner stuff, and naturally, this being Oreo day, things must be kept in proportion ... though before we start, the pond would like to raise one question on the matter of incessant chatter about China ...

Whenever the pundits from both sides of the aisle get going, and raise saucy doubts and fears about the Chinese government, or seek to defend it, by magical consensus, the issue of North Korea disappears ...

The Chinese government could, if it so desire, bring down the North Korean government in a nanosecond. It's obvious enough why it doesn't - it wants stability and it fears the consequences, the North Koreans now being totally out of control and a law unto themselves, and they do have nukes.

Persuading China (and Vlad the Impaler) to do more about what has been at various times their client state, and still relies on them for the basic necessities of life, would seem a very handy activity, and yet it's usually glossed over ...

...China's support for the North Korean regime goes back to the 1950s and the Korean War. The Chinese Communist Party has strong practical and ideological ties with the ruling Workers' Party of Korea. 
The last thing China wants is to see a messy regime change, especially on its borders. Its concern is that since North Koreans have sacrificed so much for this nuclear program, Pyongyang must not seem to be "forced" to abandon it. Otherwise, Kim Jong-un could be so weakened that his government could fall. 
For the same reason, China has tried to soften the blow of UN sanctions by continuing to buy and sell goods that are allowed or that fall into a grey zone. In fact, 90 per cent of North Korea's trade is with China. (more here).

Well yes but what's the bet that the Oreo won't mention it?

Oh sheesh, it's just the usual jibber jibber about Maoist values in Western states ... as if the Donald, whom the Oreo quite likes, isn't already busy trying to establish 'dear leader' values in the United States of America ...

Well the pond knew there was a reason why it didn't bother tackling Polonius on Mao, while it could look with equanimity on the Oreo, greedy for that trade fix ... and there will surely be at least one decent punch line before journey's end ...

Actually it turned out that there were a couple ... how else to describe the demand  for muscular examination, followed by a muscular example of equivocating jibber jabber ...

Despite positive developments pertaining to China’s liberalisation and adoption of capitalism, much CCP ideology remains Maoist. Given the muscular Maoism of the Chinese government and associates, one would expect Western free-thinkers to question individuals and institutes in receipt of their largesse — Labor senator Sam Dastyari included. However, the great reciprocal benefits reaped by Australia and China through our free trade agreements should not be jeopardised by a presumption of ill intent on either side. 
China is Australia’s largest two-way trading partner and maintaining productive trade relations is a priority for the Australian government. Significant foreign investment is required to jump start the Australian economy.

And so on. Now it's not the pond's business to give hints to the muscular Chinese, but that sort of jibber jabber marks the Oreo as a soft touch, one ready and willing to understand the great reciprocal benefits to be reaped through meaningful partnerships ...

Comrades, consider what not jeopardising things with a "presumption of ill intent" might mean when you consider offering funding for the Oreo Institute of Western Values, with Chinese emphasis ...

And then there's bizarre attempt to revert to proud defiance ...

Carr has urged Australia to remain “open” to China, but does not clarify whether he means the Chinese people or the CCP. Liberal openness is a Western virtue consistent with the open society ideal, but we have learned through bitter experience that without discrimination, it erodes the foundations of freedom. China may not like the Australian government exercising greater discrimination in foreign investment, but after the sabre-rattling has quieted, it might learn to respect us for it.

Liberal openness? Through that confused, incoherent, inchoate mess of a column, the pond saw only a rich paranoia, together with a willingness to be tempted ...

But that's the Oreo for you ... 

After all Maoist values allow for tempting biscuits, though with some slight adjustments in taste ...you can read Rethinking The Oreo For Chinese Consumers here, but the pond will just settle for the tease ...

Yes, and then those delicious biscuits can be served to the leets of North Korea ...