In which the pond visits the Catholic Boys Daily and the predictable happens...

(Above: well that's all the illumination the pond needs on certain matters, and more illuminating Rowe here).

Yesterday, it took the pond seven and a half hours to upload data which on a good day could have been uploaded in less than a half hour.

But the good days are gone and the pond is stuck in a lemon, where maintenance is a meaningless word ...

It's impossible to count the ways that the pond loathes the Optus the (please in German), Malware (and News Corp and Stephen "a great big internet filter for everyone" Conroy).

In other agile, innovative news, the pond was tremendously reassured to learn that the federal government is criminalising the de-anonymising and publishing of data.

At first the pond wondered if this meant the entire staff of the ABS might be hauled up on charges, but of course they didn't bother anonymising the data in the first place, in their attempt to destroy privacy and turn some coin out of the data.

But at least the pond was reassured that Russian hackers were now quaking in their boots waiting for the knock on the door from the federal plods, while apparently Chinese hackers have sworn to go on the straight and narrow. Apparently the 400 lb hacker identified by Donald Trump as a serious threat to the cyber has resolved to give up pizza.

Never mind, after a moment's reflection, rocket scientist George Brandis - resting from his day job as brain surgeon - realised that things might get tricky for the white hats so has decided on some exemptions.

The latest sorry sign of terminal technological stupidity in the government is here, and now, there's time for a quick pivot because there's always a need for a laugh...

Now the pond usually has no time for present or past restaurant writers, but for anyone that missed it, please allow the pond to commend Frank Bruni's effort in the NY Times to replicate in a column Donald Trump's performance in debate, Sympathy for the Donald ...

That's better, and now the pond must turn as always to the giant minds of the reptiles, who like the pond live in some Optus-supplied fortress island unconnected to the rest of the world ...

This can lead to unusual, fluff and navel-gazing obsessions, such as the Daily Terrorists beyond the valley of the gutter tabloid obsession with a politician's daughter ...

The pond feels grubby and soiled just noting the sordid and seedy way the grubby, soiling, spoiling way the reptiles go about the business of selling their tree killing rags. 

But the pond wanted something more, something sure to lance the festering boil of anger, and sure enough, right on cue, the Catholic Boys' Daily,  as the lizards of Oz are fondly known (term patented by Justinian, borrowed by the pond at times of an emergency), came to the rescue ...

Yes, that'll do it, there's nothing like a smarmy, righteous Xian blathering on about love and respect, as a way of dressing up bigotry and homophobia, a Catholic church tradition for a few thousand years, to really get the pond going...

With respect, the pond really gets agitated by this sort of demeaning horseshit. The bullshit notion that it's possible to hate the sin but love the sinner is the classic form of Xian passive aggressive behaviour ...

Passive-aggressive behavior is the indirect expression of hostility, such as through procrastination, stubbornness, sullen behavior, or deliberate or repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible. 
For research purposes, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) revision IV describes passive-aggressive personality disorder as a "pervasive pattern of negativistic attitudes and passive resistance to demands for adequate performance in social and occupational situations." (Greg Hunt it here, watch out for passing walri).

Porteous is one of those classic Xian gits - yes, over the years the pond has been smarmed over with righteous talk of correcting Xian love helping reform its many sinful ways - who dresses up the hate as a respectful criticism of the beliefs or actions of others ...

You know, like you're off to burn in hellfire for all eternity you damned faggots ...

Never mind the way Christ liked the company of men in a way the church and Cardinal Newman might think is unhealthy, there's more on the hate and the homophobia in that story here, but perforce the pond must return to the domestic brand being peddled in the Catholic Boys' Daily ...

It's hard to imagine a better way for the pond to exorcise its anger than this steaming pile of tosh.

Don't proffer your demeaning faux love, get out of the way so that people might share rights, you carping superstitious transubstantive cannibalistic medievalist ...

Of course Porteous was one of the bishops behind that steaming pile of bigotry and prejudice, the pamphlet "Don't Mess With Marriage" - easily googled for anyone wanting their dose of honey-smooth bile dressed up as love ...

The pond is too over it to feature it, but it's worth remarking on at least one of its semantic and definitional flaws ...

...marriage is the covenant of a man and a woman to live as husband and wife, exclusively and for life, and open to the procreation of children.

So if you re-marry in your dotage, like Fred Nile, you're not really married at all, unless you're senile enough at 79 to think that somehow your new 55 year old partner is open to the procreation of children ...

Never mind, at least this means Fred is living in sin, and is off to hell in due course to dwell there with the gays ...

And as for exclusively and for life, don't get the pond started on the enormous stupidity of alleged virgins married to Christ who can peddle this sort of twaddle while their church is a festering home for pedophiles ...

Never mind, at least in other countries, the two thousand year reign of bigotry and homophobia has suffered a few dents in recent times, rather like the big tobacco companies that peddle their poison ...

And now, while the pond is lashing out, it's about time to turn to Twitter, because this might be all the energy the pond has this day while battling the intertubes ...

And there's more Moir here ... though perhaps rather than sand, he should have shown Malware being blown away by a blast of wind ...