Day 82 of MUC and day 35 of MOC, and a bonus as the bromancer does a Boris ...

And the pond thought he was fighting for delusion, but what a fine tweet it is ... even if it's got nothing to do with the main game, which is a special bonus celebration of the dog botherer going the full Boris ...

Excellent, exciting stuff, not that it's likely to do the pond much good. 

Thanks to the dismal reptiles, the pond's business plan is shrinking at an alarming rate, much like the reptiles themselves. Hits are down, readers are disappearing, people are bored, and there's not going to be a reptile-led recovery anytime soon.

The ennui is everywhere. As a reader's already noted, Amanda Meade reported that the Sky News forum scored 34,000 viewers, and an official rating of * in Brisbane, up against the ABC scoring 800k to show off Malware (here) - so much for pay TV as a business plan - while at the same time, Meade carried news of more Fairfax downsizing, and the reptiles closing seven their local Victorian newspapers ...

What can the bromancer do to help arrest the decline? Will a full Boris do the trick?

Thank the long absent lord, for a minute there, the pond thought we might be getting one-minute-to-midnightish about all this, and perhaps a tad alarmist, but the complete decline and fall of western civilisation - even worse than the Romans - is surely worth a full Boris ...

Must have been an Islamic, and how kind of Boris to wave back ... but back to the bromancer going the full Boris...

What's the bet, having announced the imminent decline and fall of all that we hold dear, the bromancer will accuse others of a textbook case of disgraceful fear-mongering.

Oh go on, you say, surely even the bromancer wouldn't lack that amount of self-awareness and irony, but happily the pond can say it is so and thus ... and what's more having written it, he then goes on to produce an even longer textbook case of classic and disgraceful fear-mongering ...

Oh perhaps the pond misread it. This is really a classic textbook explanation for how racism is all the fault of the politicians ... and certainly not the fault of apologists and lickspittle forelock-tugging reptiles busy sowing the seeds of discontent and fear.

Hang on, there's a few more seeds to sow yet ... because where would a classic fear-monger be without assorted catastrophes in his textbook?

Well it's not the business of the pond to defend Cameron, nor is the pond perturbed at the sight of the Government Gazette turning on conservatives elsewhere.

It seems nasty populism and Nigel Farage and UKIP must rule, because that will avoid really nasty populism - of the onion-munching Sheridan down under kind - turning up later. At last, the pond can see a new business model ... setting up an offshore gulag in the Orkney islands.

That said, it's hard to see how the bromancer going the full Boris will fix the business model of the reptiles or even help out at the pond ... but if the bromancer's advice wins out, Europe and the world can look forward to some most unhappy times for the next few years ...

As soon as a populist, or at least a fellow traveller with populists elsewhere, starts explaining how there's going to be heaps of pie in the sweet bye and bye, and in every way, everything's going to be for the best in the best of all possible worlds, the pond knows it's being offered a trickle down chance to buy a Boris pup or a bromancer harbour bridge ...

Never mind, time for a cartoon, and more Rowson here ... always worth a bookmark ...

And there's just time for a Steve Bell, and more Bell here ... always worth a bookmark ...