In which the pond saves the freedumb crying loons for last, and first must get past the bromancer and the Oreo ...

 

 

First the pond must give a token nod to the news of the day, and trouble at mill ...  and the pond isn't even talking about the bald faced liar lying about his holiday junket ...

Rather, it seems that if you embrace freedumb loons, the loons will chant freedumb right back at you ...

 

Oh indeed, indeedy do, the freedumb man let loose a heap of snakes, including a few reptiles at the lizard Oz, and the tree killer edition also had to pay attention ...

 

 

More of the freedumb reptiles later, as the pond turns to the bromancer for consolation, comfort and security ...

 

 

 

 

 

Ah, the bromancer, heiling the bold and the brave in his usual way, but the pond could scarcely believe it. 

 

Tuesday was when Dame Groan was routinely called on to rail and rant at migrants... as noted yesterday in the pond.

The pond had confidently predicted the Groaner would deliver a classic groan this day, and could scarcely believe she'd gone MIA. 

 

The pond went on a desperate search, but there was no new groaning to be found, and instead there was this perfidious mountebank charlatan bromancer in her place ... blathering on in a way that the Groaner routinely despised.

Oh Groaner, why hast thou forsaken the pond in its hour of need? Perhaps she'll turn up later, but in the meantime, the pond was stuck with this ...

 

 

Ah, the pond should have seen what's coming, as celebrated in that click bait video inserted as a distraction from the bromancer's blather. 

The return of the third runway. and planes roaring overhead every five minutes, and the bromancer rubbing his hands with glee, as discarded or burnt up Avgas once again filled the pond's nostrils ...

Things then took a strange turn. With the greatest respect to JM, the pond's lone, brave correspondent from the United States, the bromancer turned to the United States as a model. Perhaps if the pond wanted vigilantism, and killer vigilantes armed to the teeth, roaming the streets or sitting in Congress, it might do the same, but perhaps not ...

In the meantime, never mind the nonsense of climate science, it's growth all the way, because the bromancer knows full well the bigger the cock, the bigger the man ...

 

Another click bait video, and the threat of more planes, and meanwhile, it's populate or perish, because ten billion people on the planet is surely not enough, and we must surely aim for twenty billion ... and that'll larn ya, climate science ... we'll be ever so secure, like warm little bugs in a bromancer bed ...

And then came a further surprise ... the Oreo on a Tuesday? No groaning, but a little weight-adding Oreo?

The reformed, recovering feminist used to be on a Monday, and the pond supposes that technically 11 pm is still Monday. But in the pond's sense of how a clock runs, she'd been held over, and given a Tuesday run instead of a decent groaning. 

It made the pond feel deeply uneasy ... only to be swiftly bored ...

 

 

Small business must have tools? Has the Oreo gone mad, or perhaps returned to her anarcho-syndicalist feminist roots?

Doesn't she realise the solution is can do capitalism, and certainly doesn't involve can't do government.

Oh wait, pond presses finger to ear, mocking old style earpiece reporting, this just in from Bernard Keane, as keen as mustard four days ago in Crikey ...

 

Well that was fun, and a reminder that you shouldn't turn to tools for can do government tools ...

But now it's on with the reformed, recovering feminist's obsession with tools ...

 

Yes, yes, all that and more, and the pond is pleased to hear about South Australia, but as crow eaters know, eastern staters like the pond really have no interest in them, and mock the great aunts under the wisteria on the verandah, and so on and so ...but what about the tools? Where are the tools? There must be tools! Send in the tools ...

 

Funny or sad really, as you like it. The Oreo seems to have gone full Adelaide, full crow eater, and apparently the wretches are unaware of how things work in states with a Liberal government. In NSW, you produce your evidence of your vaccine status, via phone or print out, and move on ... 

It takes no more than a nanosecond, and the pond is aware of at least one privacy commissioner happy to have privacy invaded for the purpose of getting on with life ... the pond supped with them, and getting into the restaurant took but a passing glance ...

As for crying out for can do government, the Oreo has missed the boat. Somebody give her a hose to hold ...

And now the pond has saved the best treat for last, naturally featuring the weakest, the most contemptible, the most vile and loathsome of the reptiles. (The pond understands that the Caterist also speaks well of the pond).

When it comes to freedumb, of course the dumbest reptile would be joining in the chant ... and rioting, if only symbolically, in his column ...

 

Now the pond could argue with the Caterist in approved above the Berrimah line style...

 

 

 

But the Caterist is too much of a fuckwit to understand a kind, amiable and mild suggestion to shove it where the sun doesn't shine, so instead the pond thought it might offer a pleasant distraction with a few cartoons ...

How about a Wilcox?

 

 

Yes and seat belts and stop signs and double lines and parking meters and car park tickets and so on and so endlessly forth, and no doubt the Caterist would like to zoom through red lights and drive on the wrong side of the road, crying freedumb and libery ...

And so back to the fuckwitted loons and the Caterist crying out for freedumb ...

 

An idiot talking of idiocy? A man who couldn't even work out the movement of flood waters in quarries, yet admittedly has a keen awareness of how to hold out a paw and get some government cash? Like a rat with a certain rat cunning ...

There was only thing to do, issue an urgent prayer to the infallible Pope for a little inspiration ...

 

 

 

Dear sweet long absent lord that's good, and the pond took a moment to think of the dear sweet outside toilet the pond has that backs on to the lane where once upon a time shit carters did their duty and carted away the shit in the cause of public good ...

Meanwhile, alas and alack, there's no one to cart away the Caterist, doing his standard Comrade Dan bashing routine, as the Caterist stands with the loons so ably illustrated by the infallible Pope ...

 

Here's a tip to the Caterist. Standing with rioting freedumb loons isn't the best look, not when you have your paw in the federal government till, and bashing comrade Dan is now a very old and ancient routine ...

In the old days, genuine conservatives would have deplored the sort of fuck-witted behaviour on recent display, but the Caterist isn't a conservative as Ming the merciless would have understood it ...

But why should the pond bother to argue with a fuckwit? Better just to end with an immortal Rowe, with the hunt for immortality always on hand here ...

 

 

 

 

Yes, the pond will go with that amendment, because truth to tell, the pond would likely have been struck blind or at least dumb if Rowe had stayed closer to his inspiration ...