Difficult times for the reptiles in this crowned republic as the days drag on, and SloMo talks of hurting the thing he loves most dearly, that most precious and beloved thing that draws gasps of awe and delight from Barners …
… and worse, the reptile first eleven are still away, still enjoying their holydays, while years, nay decades, of climate science denialism begin slip-sliding away, and perhaps even worse, voices in the theatre pit cry trouble for Prince Harry …
Who will stand against the surging mob, who will cry out for England? Cometh the hour, why then cometh the Flinty man …
Oh it's been such a long, long time … yes, young pups who can barely remember yesterday, once upon a time, Flinty was a pond favourite …
At every appearance, the pond would run the Flinty cartoon …
Poor Tandberg gone, but not our Flinty.
Apparently, Flinty noted the idle chit chat amongst the indolent peasants and the hop polloi of the oscillating fan kind, as bold as brass even in the lizard Oz…
What nonsense, useless oscillating fan, please allow Flinty to set you straight …
Quite so, as Polonius might say, indeed, indeed, a storm in a teacup, nothing to see here, move along people, it's not polite to stare, and as you go about your business, carry Flinty's wise words with you ...
Ah, the crowned republic. Truth to tell, the pond almost orgasms when our Flinty talks dirty like this.
Amazingly, back in the day, in 2011 - that's how long Flinty has been peddling this stuff, even prattling Polonius thought it was jibber jabber nonsense …
Quite misleading! Why that's like being lashed with a lettuce leaf by a very stern Polonius, back then in what was known as Fairfax, here.
But has logic ever mattered to Flinty? Of course not, and so be prepared for a line beginning "Great presidents such as Reagan and Trump" ...
The pond rarely suggests anything to the editors of the lizard Oz, but surely there should be more Flinty?
Okay, these days he's only second eleven in terms of comedy stylings, but the pond treasures his humour, a Don Rickles of his times, because who else could insult intelligence the way Flinty does?
And so to the second crisis, and SloMo's dangerous talk of actually doing something about climate change, as if somehow climate science was worthy of discussion, and at least a hint of action, though without getting too alarming altogether, and actually doing anything …
For this, the reptiles have elevated our 'hole in the bucket' Henry from his Friday to a Monday slot, to fill the gaping hole left by nattering "Ned", the Major Mitchell, the tasty Oreo, and such like …
Top of the commentary section, ma, top of the reptile heap, top of the world for our Henry!
Now the important challenge our Henry faces will be to get through his lengthy piece talking of many things - perhaps even cabbages and queens of a crowned Republic - without dwelling on climate science or climate change-related action ...
It's a good, solid, distracting, if somewhat cautious start, but trust the pond, the hole in the bucket man is just warming up ...
Ah, flooding in the 1950s and flooding in Queensland. Well, it surely beats any talk of climate science and climate change in the present moment … and how the pond admires our hole in the bucket's man's skill and dexterity in this time of crisis ...
Yes, Commonwealth-State relations are surely the most pressing issue of the hour, and still not a word about climate science. Is our Henry a champeen, or what?
Oh dammit, he was doing so well, harking back to Macquarie, speaking of the spirit of the Enlightenment, and generally spruiking the humbug for which our Henry is much noted and admired in reptile circles, but then he had to go and spoil it by actually mentioning climate science, albeit indirectly, and albeit with the right rhetorical flourish …
How the states would react is hard to say. What is certain is that a renewed emphasis on genuine risk-reduction will not satisfy the Greens, whose idea of mitigation involves making sacrificial offerings of penance to the gods of decarbonisation who, like Jove, may prove fickle, narcissistic and impossible to please.
By Jove, he's a winner, but will it be enough to stop this dangerous Greenie swaying in the wind?
It will take all the reptile skills of the first eleven team to turn SloMo from this dangerous path …
Our Henry has been a worthy filler, a stop gap, something to plug up the gaping seams, but really it's time for the expert climate science denialists to return from their holydays, and get on with the task at hand …
It's all very well talking of heeding Macquarie's call, but did Macquarie ever really understand the reptile yearning for dinkum clean Oz coal, oi, oi, oi, as a way of fixing the world in these troubled times?
Luckily there will be an infallible Pope on hand to counsel them, steel them, and evoke the justice and righteousness of their cause …
Indeed, indeed, such a relief, sweet precious coal to be saved, and all the creatures sent to heaven - let God and Her merry band of angels sort them out - and so the world can still be a dinkum happy clean Oz coal-loving place ...
Well that was a fine pair of dilatory duffers to feed up to us on a Monday, DP. But I do have to say that the execrable Flinty did at least get one thing right when he explains that: "The renovations to Frogmore Cottage were not paid from taxes but by the Queen from her Crown Estate, hereditary possessions of the sovereign "in the right of the crown". Nor do Harry and Meghan receive taxpayer funded allowances. Their office is funded principally by Prince Charles from his Duchy of Cornwall ..."
ReplyDeleteIn fact, as I understand it, far from costing Pommie taxpayers anything, the Monarchy and Royals not only pay their own way but also add about 1.8 billion pounds to the annual British GDP, including about 600 million pounds in additional tourism based revenue alone. Wouldn't us "where the bloody 'ell are ya" folks just love that.
Of course, if you're a rabid reptile (is there any other kind) you might maintain that the Pommie Royals have no right to the ownership of their traditional property which should be returned to "the people", but then that's your problem.
And as to Holes in the Bucket, lots of ravings about "mitigation efforts", but no words about what they would be, how long they would take, whether they could survive the continuous variation from climate change etc. In short, the usual 'fabulous imaginary wish list' approach which is all that rabid reptiles can ever seem to manage.
So it goes.