Why not start with a low Barr, before moving on to the usual reptile fluff?
The pond sometimes feels apologetic about the lack of content about some idle spruiker representing the wonders, the glories and the many truths of Islam, Hinduism, Scientology and other such nonsense.
But the chances of finding a reptile willing to bray about this sort of stuff, or get published after scribbling it, is about as remote as the reptiles publishing a piece on the wonders of Waleed Aly (oh there'd be none of this sort of stuff, here).
Similarly the pond wouldn't mind mentioning the further reaches of absurdist, surreal climate science denialism as spruiked by Liberal party conspiracy theorists …
But what to make of, or say about, a candidate who has merely faithfully read all that the reptiles have scribbled over the years, and then managed to regurgitate it?
Sadly that's at the ABC here, with hot links, and so outside the pond's turf, just as anyone interested in this story …
… must revert to the Graudian here …
It's simply not in the reptile nature to publish treasonous, heretical stories; instead it seems the parrot has been shifted from rugger buggering to political reporting …
And here the pond has an immediate sticking point, because when it comes to the truth, the parrot can't handle the truth. In fact, the parrot and the truth are complete strangers …
That's in Crikey for those who want to breach the paywall and remember the infamy …
So what else did the reptiles have to offer this day? Well it was slim pickings of the silly kind …
The sight of a reptile purporting to care about carbon free energy is always preposterous, while Dame Groan was just being Dame Groan, and the venerable Sexton of the inverted commas has reverted to that tired old hack talk of "politically correct times" …
And that's how the pond ended up back in familiar company, the dog botherer and the clap-happy SloMo …
Well no, not really. The reptiles used to give former Chairman Rudd hell for the naked contrivance of his interviews outside assorted churches …
Dame Slap was but one of them, here back in August 2009, and luckily a reprint so it's outside the reptile paywall …
Indeed, indeed, and there was absolutely no need for SloMo to invite the cameras inside the church, and catch him doing the Nazi salute, with consequences reported elsewhere, as at Nine here, though inevitably not by the dog botherer …
What did SloMo expect to come from his dog whistling to Jesus? Adoration? People falling to their knees and proclaiming a miracle? That's work best left to the bromancer ...
Only the dog botherer could find redemption for this sort of mingling of private faith and public branding …
Nauseating really, the lengths the dog botherer would go to spin hagiography and homilies … with Dame Slap's thoughts on former chairman Rudd long gone, as is Rudd himself …
Well, if SloMo keeps going on with this sort of folly, he won't be far behind in joining the former chairman, no matter how hard the dog botherer keeps blathering on about authenticity, because authentically believing in imaginary friends is a bit like the parrot believing he has some connection to the truth …
Don't wear your religion on your sleeve and people will stop picking at the threads. The pond imagines that if it invited a bunch of Nazi-saluting atheists in for a ritual sacrificing of a goat, it might not play too well in the pond's campaign for a seat in the Senate ...
And so to dear old Barners.
Now anybody wanting to listen to the interview can head off to RN, download the audio here, and replay it enough times to send themselves off to the stables to start shovelling horse crap (amazingly such stables never contain bullshit).
The pond was intrigued at how the reptiles would spin what was an epic own goal, and sure enough, they had to go there, even if a little tardy …
The story began by being told sympathetically, through Barners' hurt, and perhaps glazed, eyes ...
Sadly the tale of a noble Barners persecuted by wretched greenies began to collapse even as the reptiles scribbled about tax-havens and the ranting, incoherent Barners ...
Verged on "corruption"?! Why the inverted commas? Why not just good, old-fashioned corruption?
There was more at the ABC via the 7.30 report, here, which made it clear enough that it wasn't just the intrinsically corrupt nature of the cash deal that was in question, it was the sort of water that had been purchased that made it a nakedly inept piece of rorting …
Sadly the reptiles had to give Barners away, and pay attention to others with a thought or two on the affair...
Meanwhile, good old Angus has run a country mile, while Barners' official statement was wonderfully comic and mangled in the usual Barners' way ...
By reason of what may be deemed as a defamatory inference, that Mr Joyce was motivated and capable of an ulterior purpose in his role as a Minister, he is currently in discussions with solicitors about this matter.
Ulterior purpose, or singular incompetence?
Who knows, and in a way, who cares, because the ranting Barners has always been singularly incompetent. Bring on an inquiry, and let the devil sort it out.
It's a never no mind really, but at least it put the pond in the mood for a Rowe and a Pope cartoon … with more Rowe here ...
And the infallible Pope below is dedicated to Gerard Rennick.
Long may conspiracy theories thrive for the good of the planet, and long may more papal pleasures be found here ...
Reading today's Doggy Bov I think makes it clear that the reptiles really have taken on board a major life-lesson coming from George Orwell: if today you don't like what you said yesterday, then just stuff it down the 'memory hole' and say the opposite as though it has always been an uncontestable universal truth. Hmmm.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm beginning to worry just a little about the state of affairs (haha) in Barnabytown - is everything well there ? He just seems so emotional and out of control these days.
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ReplyDeleteWhat's this "authenticity" Fido's best friend is on about? It seems like it is a belief or action so illogical or ill considered that no sensible reason can be attributed to it. It would be less confusing if DB substituted "stupid" for "authentic".
ReplyDeleteThe default assumptions here are that most Australians are both conservative and religious. I don't think they are either, at least not in the sense that DB understands the terms.