Alternative realities, alternative facts, alternative polls … is it any wonder that the pond is a devotee of the alternative bizarro world of the lizards of Oz?
What's more, alternative poll news apart, the photo features an astonishing feat of mystical levitation.
See how SloMo makes the ball rise through the sheer power of his mind, something a Scientologist might drop 40k on trying to achieve while never actually meeting their inner Thetan …
And if SloMo can make a ball mystically hover in mid-air, why the bouffant one can also make a cake rise with hope … here no drooping soufflé, no drooping soufflé here, but a light on the summit ...
Numbers won't do it… what you need is the power to lift balls with your mind!
But enough of the pond trying to be relevant and keep up with alternative reality.
As usual, Monday is a top notch day for lizard Oz loonery, and so some careful curating was called for, and the pond makes no excuse for leading off with an old favourite … dashing Donners … with a clarion call that never tires from endless repetition …
As usual, Monday is a top notch day for lizard Oz loonery, and so some careful curating was called for, and the pond makes no excuse for leading off with an old favourite … dashing Donners … with a clarion call that never tires from endless repetition …
You see? The poisonous neo-Marxists are even at work within the lizard Oz, converting what should have been a thumb photo of Donners into inverted commas! Is there no end to their tricks and mind games, and the endless march towards mindless quotation mark conformity of a Marxist kind?!
Western values need defending? Too soon after Christchurch? No, it's always a good time to get out the paranoia, and perhaps the Glock … or at least the Donner phallus, softening under the vile assault of wretched feminists, even as the noble lad seeks comfort from fellow travellers in the school of TG bashing ...
Unfairly privileged? Say what? Doesn't everyone get to shelter in a Catholic university and scribble furiously at anyone who is different, and routinely get published in the lizard Oz, while offering a rant so familiar that the leather now has the sheen of a well-worn codpiece ...
Odds bodkins, were you not entertained, and the pond offers for free its vast collection of Donners shouting at clouds as a suitable unit in the University of Kansas course on Angry White Males …
But much as the pond would like to linga longa with Donners, on a Monday there is a huge amount of pressure on space, and the pond must immediately move on to another favourite, the Major …
Yes, it's another offering for the University of Kansas's course on Angry White Males - that goes without saying - but really, how loyal of the Major to stick up for an old chum.
These days such loyalty is too often dissed, even as the onion muncher goes through hard times …
These days such loyalty is too often dissed, even as the onion muncher goes through hard times …
See how the Major tries to set things right … and at the Major's usual tedious length, because there's no point shouting in short bursts …
Yes, whatever your views on the onion muncher and the way he's spent the past few years relentlessly sniping, wrecking, undermining and totally fucking up the government and assorted matters like the NBN and a sensible response to global warming, what a splendid chap he is, with a remarkable attitude to climate science that simply calls to the Major like the siren song of a cuckoo ...
The pond loves to decipher the secret messages and the clues that the reptiles embed in their pieces.
The Major is a tad obvious and might have used a more subtle code, because there's no need for an Enigma machine here… the onion muncher is in deep shit, and in urgent need to special reptile pleading to save his bacon and his togs …
The Major is a tad obvious and might have used a more subtle code, because there's no need for an Enigma machine here… the onion muncher is in deep shit, and in urgent need to special reptile pleading to save his bacon and his togs …
Plead on, Major, as only a loyal parrot can do … and remember, now is a good time to recycle anonymous snarky, bitchy comments, because there's nothing that elevates a piece more than nebulous reporting of anonymous back-stabbing ...
Ah, the ancient art of the reptile smear, perfected by the Major long ago when he went in search of an Order of Lenin medal … and when last mentioned, still hadn't managed to find it …
In a perverse way, Steggall should perhaps be pleased and proud to have attracted the Major's attention, loyally recycling anonymous smears and berating all and sundry associated with her. It means she really has got under the onion muncher's skin, and he really is in deep shit, and so the smearing must continue and must be widened to include all her fellow travellers ...
Odds bodkins, Major, keep up …there's some ancient news from China that's relevant here ...
There's more here, but just so the Major and the onion muncher might contemplate a little data ...
Things are changing in India too … A Future Without Fossil Fuels? (outside the NYRB paywall for the moment) … but the pond must find room for the last splutter of the Major ...
The onion muncher is the candidate for working class Janes and Joes, while Steggall and Labor will take care of the rich?
Are you not entertained? Did not the pond promise you an outing in the bizarro world known as the lizard Oz?
Are you not entertained? Did not the pond promise you an outing in the bizarro world known as the lizard Oz?
Does the Major really think the notion that comrade Bill is for the rich will fly?
Never mind, we must move along, with the pond full of deep regret and remorse.
You see, even with the pond's careful curating of bizarro world, many are called, but not all are chosen, not even the pond's great favourites …
Never mind, we must move along, with the pond full of deep regret and remorse.
You see, even with the pond's careful curating of bizarro world, many are called, but not all are chosen, not even the pond's great favourites …
Why this day there was the Oreo displaying the astonishing empathy for which she is famous worldwide, and perhaps galactically, while the Caterist was calling out the Chinese government's green car gamble ...
If it turns out to be a slow Tuesday, the pond might well revert to these favourites - the pond never tires of the enormous stupidity of the Caterist, government cash in the paw and flood water in quarries expert - but it must find the room for an astonishing dog botherer meltdown ...
He could never demonstrate? But isn't he about to demonstrate?
Now this is probably a step to far for the amateur reptile handler, already tired by keeping company with Donners and the Major, but professionals will understand that Mondays can turn into something of a slog as the dog botherer reveals his inner dummy, his sheltering dodo ...
Now this is probably a step to far for the amateur reptile handler, already tired by keeping company with Donners and the Major, but professionals will understand that Mondays can turn into something of a slog as the dog botherer reveals his inner dummy, his sheltering dodo ...
Clearly he's in a rage … but for a reason which will become clear only at the very end of this long and strange rant ...
The pond isn't much of a Freudian, but offers this sample range to diagnose what ails the dog botherer (more explication here) …
It's clear enough to the pond that we're dealing with projection, though it will allow that denial, displacement, regression and sublimation might also be involved.
Whatever, it's pretty fucking weird ...
Did the dog botherer just discover that there's a multitude of people who despise the Murdochians and look to the ABC for some sort of alternative?
Apparently, but after this gobbet we'll come to the real reason for the dog botherer's continuing discontent ...
Indeed, indeed, the polarisation of our media continues apace. The Murdochian-funded minnow is becoming increasingly entrenched ideologically, and even worse, its business plan looks pitifully short-sighted and fuckwitted …after all, how many copies of a rag can you give away for free at airports and sundry other places before you go broke?
But what's the real reason for this dog botherer outburst? Well again no Enigma Machine is required ...
Oh reptiles, did you have to add that footnote?
Did you have to remind the dog botherer and the world of his fatuous ignominy and wildly comic fame?
You're still apologising for the dog botherer being a foolish twit, deeply in love with twittering and wittering like a Donald?
Did you have to remind the dog botherer and the world of his fatuous ignominy and wildly comic fame?
You're still apologising for the dog botherer being a foolish twit, deeply in love with twittering and wittering like a Donald?
Not that it stops the lad, because he just loves inviting the hate …
"Sigh"?
Is he suddenly a thirteen year old?
Well there was one classic exchange at the end of that ancient tweet. Freudians, please step up to the mark, and await the firing of the starter's gun …
Oh he probably meant it as irony, but remember what Freud said about regression …
Were you not entertained? Was it not worth hanging around for?
Well sadly, it means that David Rowe is at the bottom of the heap, but there's more Rowe here, and after wading through that lot, it at least reminds the pond that one cartoon can be worth a zillion reptile words …
And how thoughtful of Rowe to spare a moment which addresses both Donners' and Major Mitchell's deepest fears and inner desires …
"The pond isn't much of a Freudian, but offers this sample range to diagnose what ails the dog botherer..."
ReplyDeleteSee: https://www.simplypsychology.org/defense-mechanisms.html
Well well, DP, that certainly is a very comprehensive catalogue of all that ails a reptile (any reptile, anywhere, any time). Though I have always counted 'Projection' as an attack tactic ... but then, I suppose attack is the best form of defence.
Though I am a little surprised that 'Transference' was left off the list - I've always reckoned that as a form of defensive self-disguise. But hey ... And don't all the reptiles, especially that very fragile snowflake the Doggie Boverer, exhibit every single one of them
Though I am wondering just a wee bit about Donners. Now I know that reptiles must all develop their set of evasions and lies to populate their very own catechism, but really ... The other reptiles at least make a pretense of changing the topic from week to week, but not Donners; for him nothing ever changes. Beware the evils of ... cultural marxism !
Do you think maybe he's been replaced by an AI (Artificial Imbecility) drone ? After all, looking at the one thar's called ScoMo, they're making them look almost human nowadays.
I was rather moved by the Maj's concern for the battlers of Warringah. A quick look on a real estate site shows median values Manly Vale $1.8m, Brookvale $1.3m and Forestville $1.5. Probably not bragging rights in Sydney but good for two properties in most places.
ReplyDeleteThe Pond is also correct about secret messages. The subtext I see is that the giant brains supporting the conservatives have just started to realise that the fossil fuel infrastructure that has been so profitable for them is starting to look like a stranded asset. Wouldn't it be nice for the government to underwrite it so the poor can carry the cost?
Mind you, the other hypothesis is that the Maj is too ignorant or ill-informed to recognise the facts.
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ReplyDeleteWhatever your views on Abbott, he has been a diligent local member, raising large amounts for the Manly Women’s Shelter, Bear Cottage (children’s hospice) and the Royal Far West (centre for rural children needing medical treatment in Sydney) with his annual Pollie Pedal. He turns up for surf life saving events, still patrols at Queenscliff beach and is a long-term member of his local Davidson Rural Fire Brigade.
She (Steggall) received an Order of Australia in 2009 for her services to the Olympic movement and to charity.
Come on boss, what charities? A bit more homework required.
I don't think charity is a good thing. Great for virtue signalling insincere politicians but the idea is to manage things so that no one needs to accept charity to get by.
ReplyDeleteIt is small brained narrow minded conservatives who are such hypocrites that they can go along with glibertarian claims that there is no such thing as society who now talk about what is wrong with society; how are these two concepts reconciled in the brain of a Conservative like Abbott or did Pell absolve him of any need to be rational in his thinking for evah?
I suppose they believe that their God made the world so there would always be poor people around just so that rich people can do charitable stuff and feel good about themselves?
And all that blokey stuff with the budgie smugglers is such a transparent showing off of his belief that he is an 'alpha male' lol. Hairy chest and all. He's a joke and the amazeball attitude he showed about the socialist free book exchange thing was hilarious.
So I do hope that Steggall doesn't do charity is into prevention of the need for it.
Isn't what parents do for their children charity ? The children do nothing to earn all the largesse that their parents provide for them. And they rarely pay it all back.
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