Saturday, August 18, 2018

Is the first mossie of the summer a sign that there will be blood, there must be blood?

Talk about a bad sign. 

The first mossie of summer in the shower in mid-August … dead now for its outrageous cheek, but the mossie wars, and the bush fires, have begun early this year ...

Speaking of irritating, grating, monotonous sounds, the pond would usually turn to prattling Polonius to kick start things, but this weekend, other wars, and much navel-gazing, is afoot in the lizard Oz …


The mutton Dutton is being thrust forward as an alternative?

The pond couldn't imagine a finer outcome, except perhaps the return of the onion muncher himself, with the trusty Barners as his Sancho Panza. 

Who would be pushing this brilliant strategy, who would be behind this much-loved figure who beguiles the electorate so?

 

Uh huh … the barking mad Murdochian tabloids …

As a result, thoughts of prattling Polonius imitating the sounds of summer mosses had to be put on the back burner. 

The top of the lizard Oz opinion page was alive with speculation …


It was an easy choice … tempting as it was to join the
oscillating fan in contemplating total annihilation, and the phoenix onion muncher and Barners arising from the ashes, beguiling as it might be to do Shakespeare with the bouffant one, nattering "Ned" had to be given the floor …

How did the pond know?


He'd been blessed with a Lobbecke …the absolute sign of cult approval, as solid as the Phantom's good mark ...

Of course doing "Ned" involved having a base camp at a dangerously high level where the oxygen was thin, and the relentless trudge to the end would feel like a never-ending marathon, but that's the sort of Woodchuck spirit the pond thrives on …

Perhaps, if the pond got light-headed, it might meet the infallible Pope at the summit … meanwhile, let the trudging begin ...


Say what?

Turnbull's leadership is not in play?

And yet the bouffant one suggested there was something wrong in the state of Denmark, and the Murdochian tabloids had let loose the mutton Dutton dogs of war?

Talk about a spoilsport, and in the first gobbet too …

The pond began to sense that nattering "Ned" might be trying to mount a rearguard action ...


Retain his credibility?

Malware still has credibility?

Well there's a lot to learn when reading nattering "Ned" ...


There will be no repeat? They won't decide to change leaders six months or so out from an election, and run with the mutton Dutton, with his enormous appeal to the electorate?


By golly the pond met the infallible Pope a little early on the climb, but just as well because talk about being shattered … 

What's with "Ned" saying the bold crusader isn't up for it?

Talk about a spoilsport, talk about underselling the coalition's infinite capacity for inflicting self-harm …

Besides, if nothing happens, what will be left for entertainment, given that every policy Malware touches, including but not limited to the NBN, turns into a disaster?

If all that's on offer for the next six months is impotent plotting by inept dropkick losers, sundry policy disasters and endless hysteria from the Murdochian tabloids in celebration of the mutton Dutton, the pond might have to change the channel ...

Hush, "Ned" is on hand to save the village ...


The Dutton option would fail? A return to some form of stability? The Labor party will be left with agonising choices?

Frankly the pond hasn't heard comedy stylings as good as this since the time it stumbled on a Lenny Bruce record ...


At the end of all that, the pond began to revive … it was still possible, the coalition government might yet produce cohesion and implement a fine set of policy initiatives, perhaps inspired by Japanese examples …


And now the good news …

The pond, in its delirium, did meet the infallible Pope at the top of the summit, and in the usual way, he offered the pond his wisdom, and a song to go with it, with a reminder that more wisdom could be found here


Oh wait, how does anyone get a membership to the Uncivil Whites Club?

3 comments:

  1. "The pond began to sense that nattering "Ned" might be trying to mount a rearguard action ..."

    Yeah, well old Neddy is hardly capable of much in the way of forward-guard action nowadays, is he. Life is like that when you can only see with your backwards looking vision. Consider this one:
    "Turnbull has been personally devising the new emissions reduction model. ... a proposal that any rise must involve the regulator and the ACCC - they will need to publish the price consequences of any higher emissions target."

    So, the great and wise Malfeasance who gave us, inter alia, the wonderful NBN will now give us a wonderful "emissions reduction model". Oh yeah, miraculous indeed. And "the regulator and the ACCC" will be involved. Well of course they will, they've done such a wonderful job up to date controlling the gold-plated grid and keeping a strong check on 'gentrailer' price-gouging, haven't they.

    Paradise is almost upon us, yes ? Except ... what about the fine example of some other regulators in matters that have been much more costly to many than power bills:
    A Productivity Commission report analysing competition in the financial sector has pointed out that our finance regulators have become enablers of an industry that is an impediment to our economic competitiveness and exploitative of their most loyal customers.
    https://theconversation.com/australias-financial-regulators-need-policing-91396

    Oh yeah, I just can't wait for a "regulator and the ACCC" created future, can you ? Another "lawyer's picnic", perhaps.

    Quis custodiet ipsos custodes, or in everyday terms: who will regulate the regulators. And please don't say that it will be our NBN deliverer.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooops, that should be gentailer (not gentRailer) as in generator - retailer.

      Delete
    2. Why would anyone have any faith in the ACCC? For years they have been cruising about studiously ignoring market manipulation by big players like the supermarket duopoly whilst making a big fuss about actions against caravan manufacturers or dating sites. Yay! - that will secure our future.

      Come to think of it - ASIC? APRA? etc etc. This "red in tooth and claw" market model requires strict regulation but all they get in Australia is a bunch of toothless mutts. You would think it was deliberate, wouldn't you?

      Delete

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