Wednesday, August 01, 2018

In which the pond doubles down on dashing Donners with a dose of Barners ...


The minute the pond spots a dashing Donners' post, it drops everything and rushes off to read ...


Oh it promised much, a major hit on simple Simon, a carting out of the trash, a taking down of the man likely most responsible for the current crisis in Western Civilisation … along with a hearty dose of Catholics R Us, because Donners always wears his institutional heart on his sleeve ...


That's it? A naked reference to the joys of the ACU, a promotional reference to Donners' own work, and a standard bit of jealousy about the wicked Gonski?

And the demand for more "cash in the Catholic paw" somehow magically transformed into "an academically rigorous curriculum"?

By golly, tirades in the lizard Oz aren't what they used to be, and to be honest the pond felt short-changed … so it had to go looking for more action …and as usual, the reptiles had arranged a tasty selection ...


The pond immediately ruled out Dame Slap … after their recent electoral disappointments, the reptiles are in a mood for a hanging and Husar looks like prime material …


But the pond isn't into "ifs", and when the report emerges Husar will have more issues than a Dame Slap column to deal with.

And nattering "Ned" surely demands his own space, so perforce the lesser Kelly's report on nutter Barner's warning of nutcase policies had to be the go …what with Sky News now firmly established as the place where nutters do the interviews and nutters go to plead their assorted causes and reveal their personal sense of deep irrelevance … (though to be fair a few prefer 2GB) ...


Dearie me, what a vicious attack on Julie Bishop …

As she traverses the country two things have consistently been in her style arsenal – her 2XU running tights at dawn and, from sunrise to sunset, blazers by Australian designers Dion Lee, Camilla and Marc, Carla Zampatti and Bianca Spender. "I've always had a deep appreciation for fashion and our designers are world class," she says. For evening appearances, like her campaign launch in Perth, the Foreign Affairs Minister employs lots of sparkle via sequin encrusted jackets and block-coloured Giorgio Armani pant suits. (More fashion notes for pollies here).

Luckily Malware is above the Akubra-loving rural ragbag's anti-fashion notes and keeps good stylistic company ...

Like Obama, the great orator and crocodile merchant of optimism, Turnbull wears Canali suits (with the odd dash of Salvatore Ferragamo and Herm├Ęs), and looks good doing so. Cause for alarm? Malcolm's jackets hang right, and he also wears his ties (blue and non-blue alike) in a Windsor, showing Abbott that – although I must admit I'm averse to it – this knot can work if the collar is cut for its breadth. But, like Mike Baird already (wisely) has, our new PM ought to lose the cufflinks. They are a hangover from his 1980s lawyering and banking, and should be disavowed. They're impractical – how are we to imagine Malcolm writing, working, and spending much of his day sitting at his desk, as many of the rest of us do? Instead, they only tempt us to imagine him back at Goldman Sachs, channelling American Psycho Patrick Bateman. Oh, the cellulose fibres of his new Prime Ministerial business cards… (AFR here)

And now, as American Psycho has been mentioned, it's back to a dinkum Aussie rural loon ...




Whenever the pond hears of Barners, it forgets all sordid current matters such as the NEG and is swept back to the golden days of radio …

 

But enough of nostalgia and memories of Tamworth, there are serious matters to resolve, though strangely Barners no longer seems an authoritative voice … what with the chewing gum on the bedpost having lost its swagger overnight ...



By golly, forget Barners, now that he's used goods, this is a job for Gina's IPA …surely they're the solution to ensuring a world that can nicely bake in its own juices and produce a roast lamb at a mere hundred dollars or so ...

And so to a distracting Pope for the day, and the pond feels a little need to provide background … with the full Fairfax story here ...



Yes, that sets the scene nicely …  nowwho will stand up for Barners, moths and lizards everywhere?




4 comments:

  1. 'Broady Boy' Donners: "...reinforces the impression that the government is more worried about the top end of town than those doing it hard."

    The "impression" ? But surely Donners is well aware that those "doing it hard" are so because its their own undeserving fault ?

    As to "the top end of town", well of course the government is most worried about that, in the immortal words of Willie Sutton*, "because that's where the money is".

    * If you are not familiar with this latter day robbing hood (he died in 1980), let Wikipedia enlighten you:
    William Francis "Willie" Sutton, Jr. was an American bank robber. During his forty-year robbery career he stole an estimated $2 million, and he eventually spent more than half of his adult life in prison and escaped three times.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Entirely way off topic, DP, but as Amanda Meade's article in the Guardian (2nd part of her ABC series) doesn't have comments available, and since you have mentioned her name in passing once or twice, I kinda hoped I could express some pent up feelings here. Feel free to delete this of course.
    ___________________________
    My personal version of Hanlon's razor: "Sufficient stupidity is indistinguishable from evil."

    So, considering today's ABC, what is the practical difference in outcomes between Michelle Guthrie and Jonathon Shier ?

    Australians once collectively owned five great 'brands' that were core service and product providers: ANA, Qantas, Commonwealth Bank, PMG and ABC. Now all we have left is a badly corporatised segment of PMG (Australia Post) and an ABC in the process of being poorly corporatised too. Good one, Australians.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oops, I see Amanda Meade's Guardian post does have comments emabled (am I just going blind ?).

      So please delete the above, DP, as I simply can't find out how to delete a comment in Blogger myself.

      Delete
    2. But, but, think of the non-exclusive value already being created for co-production partners in reducing and eliminating transcripts, libraries and backcatalogues, means of in-house productions, in-depth and investigative journalisms, basic news and current affairs, and the like. Then imagine how good it will be when the Foxy-Executives-in-the-Ultimo-house are done with their latest and greatest review, and all the fun LifeStyle-transformations-for-21st-Century-consumers which will ensue.

      Delete

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