Day 56 of MUC and day 9 of MOC, and the dog botherer stands tall and proud as an online troll ...

It's Monday, and how pleasing for the pond to be able to report that everything is well, and predictable, as the reptiles of Oz lead off with the demonic threat of dangerous greenies - don't expect to find them leading off with climate science and the alleged sacking of John Church (forced video) - together with a happy snap of joyously, deliriously happy people in a state of blissful blessedness ...

Oh to be blessed and beloved of the reptiles ... when on any other day they'd be reviled as losers, dropkicks and welfare state bludgers out for a free ride ...

Speaking of bludgers, over at the Terror, the mood is anger and bitterness and betrayal ...

Damn you Gen Y, get thee to a kitchen in Surry Hills quickstix and start cooking for the reptiles when they emerge from their bunker, and wander, famished, amongst the inner city 'leets, in search of a burger cooked with nitrogen ...

Speaking of 'leets, the reptiles have had an anxiety attack about the silvertail toff they're backing ... and seem to think that their report is premium content worth a generous subscription ...

The trouble with this is that the story has been run on the clickbait site news.com.au, so that all might read Simon Benson scribbling Malcolm Turnbull's image is hurting him with Western Sydney voters, for absolutely free, and leave with the great news that Malware might be hurting, the swing might be on, but with the grace and support of the reptiles, Malware might still get home ...

The pond keeps trying to explain paywalls and business models to the reptiles, but then when you read what Benson writes, it's hard to erect any sensible business model and expect mug punters to pay... perhaps he should just revert to channeling the onion muncher ...

Yes, the scene-stealing onion muncher has also been on the prowl, declaring himself absolutely riveted by Peta's stellar performance ... you know, her riveting work sniping and cavilling at the Harbourside Mansion Man ...

Meanwhile, Barners has been doing the agrarian hustle for a company that was woefully mismanaged and driven into the ground by sheer incompetence ...

Or such is the view of many in the immediate vicinity of Murray and Goulburn, if you can catch them speaking out of turn, as they sometimes do to the pond's informants ...

The pond remembers one diary farmer - with a very nice beachside house - boasting of making a fortune courtesy of China - and now ...

That's actually just the beginning of it, but if you want more,  you can google.

It's simple really: time to get Barners on the move, time to socialise the losses, and perhaps, time to wonder why the co-op model was abandoned so that the management could stuff everything up in grand style...

Meanwhile, the pond is pleased to report that the dog botherer has revealed himself as a classic online troll of the really stupid kind.

It takes a certain klutz class to not just act as a troll, but to revel in it and boast about it ...

Oh dear, he really isn't going to waste his time and that of his readers pretending he's someone else?

Aren't there enough trolling anonymous bloggers already clogging up the full to overflowing intertubes?

Yep, it's the dog botherer's idea of a wizard prank, a jolly jape amongst chums ...

Of course you could just respond as a dullard, fuck-witted, Genghis Khan style troll, but where's the fun in that ...

You know, the sort of foot and mouth rot infested loon that could put into one and the same sentence the notion of job security and labour market reform, code for putting everyone on short term casual contracts, with a 'sackable with a week's notice' clause ...

And not notice anything odd about the juxtaposition ...

And at the end of a totally absurd and meaningless exercise, come up with that immortal line ... "just what all this means I am not sure ..." when the answer's clear enough ... "I'm really just a dunderheaded troll, a bear with very little brain, and far too much time on my hands, and these days to get a column out, I resort to the most absurd devices and then have the nerve to talk about this sort of adolescent behaviour as associated with some kind of productivity for News Corp ..."

Well it is evidence for the need for labour market reform ...

You couldn't make this sort of meaningless mind rot up unless you happened to be a dog botherer, and so to the conclusion ...

Few events could be more important for the national debate?

So that's why they bunged it on for a Friday night up against a couple of football codes ... because they really wanted people to pay attention ...

Never mind, the pond just had to run that plug for the Insider's preview - and since it's an Insider's preview rather than an Insiders' preview, presumably only one of this morass of reptiles qualifies as an Insider ...

Relax, it's just a screen cap, all interactivity has been rendered eunuch and inert, but anyone wanting to troll anything should consider trolling this event.

25 smackeroos to listen to Kenny explaining what a clever troll he is, and giving up Oreos to listen to Oriel, and hear the oscillating fan take on the doddering 'Ned' Kelly ... f

Few events could be less important for the national debate ...

Now, how to end on an up note?

That'll do pig, that'll do ...