Monday, September 06, 2021

In which the pond is shattered by the absence of the Oreo and so consumes too many reptiles in pursuit of that pie in the sky ...

 

 

 
 
 
 
It's outside the pond's beat but the pond couldn't help noticing the surge of triumph in yesterday's Dunay Terror. 
 
Oh there'll be dancing in the streets, and the beer flowing freely, and best of all, along with the beer and the footy, and the races and the pubs, you'll get a generous serve of ...
 
 

 

 

Meanwhile, for anyone still stuck up the faraway tree with the reptiles in the land of pie in the sky, both dominant football codes will have their grand finals played outside NSW and Victoria ... which led the pond to observe this coverage in the lizard Oz yesterday ...

 





 

 

Yes, in reptile maths, 40% is the half way mark, because 80%, and lest that talk of Covid-19 hitting under 40s in Victoria seemed too gloomy, the reptiles quickly updated with splendid news that the recalcitrant renegade Comrade Dan was on board for a happy Xmas ...

And so to today's reptile observations, and naturally the Major was there at the front line ... though strangely talk of it not being a race seemed to have disappeared ...

 

 

 
 
 
Reading that headline, the pond could only think 'only in the land of the Major', and sure enough, only in the land of the Major the pond was ...
 
 

 

 

Indeed, indeed, but huzzah, triumph, the beer will flow and what an Oktoberfest it will be ... and no doubt health services around the country will be celebrating the defeat of the virus ...

But at this point the pond must interrupt to note that for whatever reason the reptiles decided to insert an out of date video in the Major's screed ...



 
 
 
 
Over 38%? But we'd reached the half way mark yesterday and were well on the way to our serve of Sunday Terror pie in the gold standard Gladys way ...
 
Now back to the Major, as always doing his duty, and tugging his forelock in the direction of Slo "it's not a race, I don't hold the hose" Mo ...
 
 

 

Oh yes, the reptiles have been exceptionally tough on gold standard Gladys. Just look at the reptiles dancing in the streets in Oktoberfest, celebrating the defeat of the wicked virus by a triumphant Gladys, leading the 'roaches out of the wilderness ...

On that note of triumph, with Gladys rampant and comrade Dan forced to toe the line - thanks to Gladys exporting the virus all over the place - the reptiles decided the moment was right to  sneak in another click bait video ... forcing the pond to render it harmless and unplayable ...

 



 

Oh dear ... there's an unfortunate reminder ...

 

 


 
 

Say what? The ABC couldn't have done that, could they? But they did, they did ...

 

 

 

 

Sorry, the pond lives in a glass house and avoids stones and in any case shouldn't be worrying about 'i' before 'e' except after 'c', when there's a splendid vision of motorhome prisons on view, a testament to the vision of gold standard Gladys and SloMo ... 

Come on Major, work to do explaining how nobody really cares about the back blocks ...
 




 

Ah, of course, it's all the fault of political correctness ... or perhaps black folk themselves ...

 



 

 

And there you have it. Everything's ship shape and hunky dory, Oktoberfest on the way, and what pleasure it will bring the reptiles to see the mighty toads and the secessionist sandgropers brought down to the gold standard ...

And so to an entirely different matter, in which the pond is brought up to date by gold standard climate scientist Lloydie on sundry dire threats to beloved, clean, virginal, innocent and sweet Oz coal ...

 


 
 
 
Shocking news indeed, and for a nanosecond the pond thought it felt a tremor run through the reptile universe, but it was only a temporary thing, with Lloydie on the case ...
 
 


But, billy goat, butt the Chinese. What's that? the Chinese are fully on board with the reptile war on effeminate men and the TG plague that is ruining the planet?

Oh well, never mind, quick, a click bait video of the precious black stuff, enough to make manly reptiles come in their pants ... see how it glistens in its dark Sauron way, what a lure it is for reptiles ...


 

Hah, as if that idle talk will scare the reptiles and make them abandon their true love ...



Indeed, indeed, but at least their assault on video games and effeminancy is a step in the right reptile direction ... 

But the pond will admit to some small concern ... you see the reptiles, gasp, decided to end with a click bait video that showed the most terrible future of all ... solar panels ...



 

Luckily it came with a warning that we must make sure the grid is for the future, the splendid future we will enjoy thanks to warm, caring, loving, dinkum clean Oz coal ...

And so to the search for a bonus ...





 

Talk about aghast ... no sigh of the Oreo. Oh sure there was a sign that Hope had finally landed, even as the lizard Oz editorialist worried that Covid cost the Japanese PM his job, but mother of mercy, must the pond come to the swishing Switzer, sounding a note of triumph ...

 


 
 
 
Ah, it's not a signal of retreat, nor even a hint of a rout ... just a redefinition of a role. Give that man a job in the ABC ...




 
 
 
Silly birds, it's a 'repreive' ... now watch how the Switzer reevaluates and reappraises the situation as he offers his repreive on events that are now only a distant memory in reptile la la land ... please, no brooding! Just a readjustment and a reassessment ...
 
 


Indeed, indeed, but times change, and so do opinions ...



 

Sorry, sorry, back to the present cogitations ...



Sorry, sorry, what were we thinking back in 2009?



 

And now back on the magic carpet for a final gobbet in the present moment ...



 

Does Switzer swish in the wind like a two dollar flag? What a pity people won't acknowledge the pleasure of seeing a flag flutter in the breeze ...

And so to a bonus for the bonus, seeing as how the bonus was so unsatisfactory ... and the pond looked up at the top of the page, and lo ...




Now the pond has an excuse for overlooking the Caterist. 

The pond was distracted by that EXCLUSIVE from Sophie ... and no doubt the reptiles are still agitated that the first episode had garnered some 856k+ views on YouTube,  with the sequel already up to 800k+, no doubt helped by Sidney Powell spitting the dummy and turning into a meme ... (and just who does get a share of the advertising revenue, advertising free ABC?)

Besides, it sounded like the Caterist was just doing a Major and extolling gold standard Gladys and the coming Oktobfest, and so it turned out, but at least there's a pleasure in knowing that the Caterist always knows how to sing for his government grant cash in the paw supper ...

 


 
 
 
 
Yep, when you can't rustle up a snap of perfidious comrade Dan, a snap of that wretched toad from the north will do the trick ... but the pond consoled itself with the thought that at least it wouldn't take long, with the Caterist probably only lasting five minutes before finishing the act of spilling his seed ...

 


 

Dear sweet long absent lord, he's predictable, what with "Compass Polling" trotted out yet again, a reminder that government grants are in safe hands when they land in the hands of a polling Caterist ...



 

By golly, it must be time for a new grant, or otherwise how will Compass Polling be able to deliver the good news?


 

 

At this point, the pond thought that the Caterist had missed a trick. Surely he should have noted, in sociopathic dog botherer style, that in any case, old farts were expendable, and talk of such deaths as tragic was best left to the few loved ones that might miss them ...

And now, on with Oktoberfest, and if you can't afford the pie in the sky to go with the beer, have you though about applying to the Department of Finance for a grant?



 

Ah yes, the life of normality under SloMo, with coal still the go, the planet in good shape, floodwaters in quarries moving in very predictable ways, at at last the immortal Rowe returned from his break to offer more Rowe here ...

 

 



11 comments:

  1. Another typical Maj. Mitch. day. He really does specialise in something that, IIRC, Bef said a while ago: "replacing a complex concept by a simple expression". Yes, all the reptiles do it, but few quite so frequently and simplistically as Mitch. So, some thinking, and (hopefully) remembering and maybe even a little bit of fact checking if I can get up some enthusiasm before addressing his "simple expressions".

    But his last para about how "More interesting will be watching the health systems cope in WA and Queensland when Delta inevitably hits the way it did in New Zealand." And how did it hit in NZ ? Wasn't that another case of gold standard Gladys exporting a Covid spreader, just as it was in Victoria and the ACT ? And by refusing to have anything to do with a "ring of steel" exporting Covid all over NSW and especially to Wilcannia ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The reptiles are doing everything in their power to ensure the virus gets out and into circulation nationally. Then all states and territories will be under the whim of the Supreme Leader. At least that is their hope.

      Delete
    2. Don't we just love the joy with which the Cater quotes gold standard Gladys: "The light at the end of the tunnel means 'accepting Covid is part of our lives, accepting that, unfortunately, people will die', said Gladys Berejiklian on Friday." And so the Killer reptiles will joyfully acclaim that we are "living with it" at last.

      And not one single reptile will ever understand that if we hadn't seriously locked down a year ago until we could start getting vaccine out there in some quantity, that we'd have had a much bigger death toll, and a much bigger hospitalisation and ICU count than we have had.

      Delete
    3. NZ may just have caught this outbreak

      https://www.health.govt.nz/our-work/diseases-and-conditions/covid-19-novel-coronavirus/covid-19-data-and-statistics/covid-19-current-cases#daily-cases

      Lesson learned - never trust Australia!

      Delete
  2. "Indeed, indeed, but huzzah, triumph, the beer will flow and what an Oktoberfest it will be ... and no doubt health services around the country will be celebrating the defeat of the virus ..."

    Unlike the real Oktoberfest, which happens in September, this Oktoberfest will be lucky to hit October. More likely November, or December, even halfway through 2022.

    ReplyDelete
  3. One of the constantly repeated bits of kindergarten psycho-gymnastics that some reptiles like to spout, and spout and spout is the one about how people "with comorbidities die with, but not of, Covid" and thus that, as Nicky Cater would like to gaslight us with: "the actual death toll from Covid-19 is almost certainly lower than the one that has been officially reported." Which, to quote a certain government financed reptile is: "a conclusion based on supposition, not evidence."

    There's several factors here: one is that not all 'Covid caused' deaths are reported or recoded as such. Examination of the ongoing 'death count' generally shows an ongoing total higher than pre-Covid average plus reported Covid caused deaths. And when we consider that the death rate from, for a major example influenza, is lower under Covid lockdown-isolating-mask regimes, then we can be sure there are more Covid caused deaths than officially recorded.

    Secondly, we need to establish that the death would have occurred now - rather than in some number of years time - without any effect from Covid. But if the death came about because Covid caused a comorbidity to flare up significantly, leading to a death now rather than years later, then in what sense is that not a Covid death ?

    When the statistics gatherers can assure us that they can accurately account for these factors - and probably others I wot not of - then I will regard the death count as 'approximate' and make no assumptions about "with" rather than "of".

    ReplyDelete
  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm. Can you bere a jiggles ?

      "Although most people should be able to grasp the maths..." I can but admire your boundless optimism and faith in the deeply hidden talents of "the average human", Bef.

      Delete
    2. Just had to correct the grammar into something approximating English.

      A lot of the audience are what you might euphemistically call "low information types", they are basically too lazy to open the window to see if it really is raining like it says on TV.

      Take 2

      Jiggles - “death is horrible but we also need to put things into perspective”. This has the same ring to it as "I don't hold a hose", "life wasn't meant to be easy", "no Australian child shall live in poverty" etc. Maybe the press can bury this but it really does deserve to be inscribed on her headstone.

      What's the loss of a few oldies compared to the sheer horror of being trapped with the kids, having to contribute to their education or not being able to get smashed at the races? No one pulls her up at pressers and says "are you fucking kidding?" or throws the odd bit of rotten fruit to get her attention.

      It seems to be the same problem as the case numbers. Although most people should be able to grasp the maths they don't really think about it until things get really, really bad then it's a case of "oh, exponential! - I get it now". In this case, no one would want to nominate someone they know to die in exchange for (mostly) trivial diversions but they wont think about it until someone close to them does die.

      Delete
  5. I see the Cater adopting the phrase 'honest conversation', which seems to be favoured by northern Republicans in what is claimed to be the 'Land of the Free', as they try to rationalize the huge encroachments on freedom coming from Republican administrations of southern states. How appropriate for the Cater to slip that phrase into a column in which he cites the results of a claimed survey of some or other group of Australians, delivered by a firm that cannot be identified on the common search engines.

    They just are not troubled by any sense of ethical behaviour, are they?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Looking both backward - to a widespread human 'worship' of 'strong', dictatorial leaders - and forward - to the Murdochian establishment of "the greater good" - then there's always this:

      How Narcissistic Leaders Make Organizations Less Ethical
      https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_narcissistic_leaders_make_organizations_less_ethical

      "Narcissistic leaders have personalities that are profoundly grandiose, overconfident, dishonest, credit-stealing, and blame-throwing, according to Chatman. They are abusive to their subordinates, think they are superior, don’t listen to experts, create conflict, and believe the rules simply don’t apply to them. They can explode in rage at any sign of disagreement or disloyalty. There’s always an “I” in their conception of the team."

      Does that sound vaguely like a lot of people we know ? Especially if we add antisocial aspects to form the complete sociopath:

      Comparing Narcissistic and Antisocial Personality
      https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-new-home/201905/comparing-narcissistic-and-antisocial-personality

      "According to the DSM-5, individuals who meet the criteria for narcissistic personality disorder have a sense of entitlement, are arrogant, consider themselves to be special, feel self-important, take advantage of others, have a great need for admiration, lack empathy, envy other people, and are obsessed with fantasies of boundless power."

      Does that sound at all familiar ? If not, then try this:

      How to Recognize a “Dark Triad” Personality
      https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/i-hear-you/202109/how-recognize-dark-triad-personality

      "The three Dark Triad personality subtypes are narcissistic, Machiavellian, and psychopathic.
      People possessing Dark Triad personalities tend to have unstable relationships and take advantage of others.
      "

      It's good to know and understand the creatures that we share our species with, isn't it ? Does 'Jiggles' Berejiklian qualify, do you think ?

      Delete

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