In which the bromancer fails to nuke the fridge, but Dame Groan helps nuke the planet and Tezza nukes Mathias ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shattered.

 

There's no other way of putting it. The pond was shattered.

 

Not by ignoring petulant Peta, wanting an inquiry ... the pond knows the reptiles love piling up paperwork, but the pond also knows that its ban on petulant Peta is permanent. Why the pond isn't even demanding an inquiry into the many ways that petulant Peta and the onion muncher fucked the country during their short reign ...

Nor was the pond much disturbed by the blind trust that Xian Porter had shown in blind trusts, because you'd expect a tone deaf man to be blind as well ...

Nor was it the news that we were going nuke, which had sent the ABC into a frothing, foaming frenzy, as they looked forward to our very own show, The Hunt for Red September ...

Rather it was the absence of any response from the bromancer, caught nuke napping. 

 

The dear crusader has had much to say on the submarine program and tanks and other heavy machinery, and right at the moment his thoughts on a good nuking are urgently needed, but the best he could do this morning is explain how Bojo is a dangerous leftist, taking Britain into dangerously leftist paths!

 

 

 

You see? Right at the moment we could be discussing Sean Connery's Russian accent, and how going nuke could transform the tremendously expensive slow moving subs program into an even more tremendously expensive slow moving show, the bromancer is distracted, and busy explaining how Bojo is even more of a leftist than Tony Bleagh ...

At this point the reptiles were obviously disturbed because they offered up an image of salvation by the saviour ...

 

 

Sorry, sorry, wrong one ... that's for the bromancer in his other guise. This saviour ...

 

 

Oh yes, the leftist Bojo ... and naturally the reptiles seized the moment to cram the bromancer's piece full of click bait videos as a distraction from the dire march of leftism across the world ...

 

No doubt the bromancer will turn his mind to nuking the subs in due course, but this shocking notion that people should care about their health system will have to do for the moment ... while the bromancer shares the suffering of the over-taxed Poms ...

 

Yes, it's come to this. A deeply leftist government has devised a way to reward the wealthy ... as leftists are wont to do, but Tories would never, ever do ...

And so it falls to the pond to note that at this point in the bromancer's waffle, the reptiles inserted another click bait video, featuring news of the leftists abandoning vaccine passport plans, but having noted it, the pond also must note it's just a screen cap, and should be put out of mind ...

 

Ah yes, giving up on vaccine passports and community care, as Bojo leftists are wont to do.

Instead it's on to the final bromancer gobbet ...

 

That reference to moving infinitely more quickly on defence capability told the pond it was reading yesterday's bromancer fish and chip wrapping paper, as used by twentieth century fish shops ...

Soon enough his valiant defence of the wealthy preserving their money would fade from sight, and his evocation of the leftist Bojo wouldn't even raise a chuckle at the Graudian, and to complete the indignity, the reptiles left the bromancer's sign off with another click-bait video, which perforce had to be given the pond treatment ...

 

 

Talk about disappointing and below the fold the rest of the reptiles had been caught napping when they should have been nuking ...

 

 

The Catholic Boys' Daily naturally featured a tyke on assisted dying, but the lizard Oz editorialist was also off the nuking pace, and so the pond could only turn to Dame Groan for a jolly good groaning ...

 

 

 

Another dull illustration, and even duller was the prospect of a rush of hot air from Dame Groan.

 

You see, Dame Groan is on the surface a climate science sceptic, and if you read between the lines, deep down an old fashioned reptile denialist, so having her scribble about climate science is a bit like having the pond explain quantum physics ... but here we are ...

 

 

Including Australia of course, but sssh, don't mention that, and don't mention Barners, and don't mention the dithering about setting a target and don't mention our deep and abiding love of coal and the example we set for the world, including the Chinese ... and please don't mention Oz at all, because we're not part of the problem, we're terribly small, and anyway, the activist journalists of the lizard Oz are on the case ...

 

Of course Dame Groan has long played this game ... here she was scribbling about the abject futility of it all back on December 10th 2018 under the header Coal town forum proving an utter waste of resources ... (you can google it if you can get past the paywall) ...

The point, of course,  is that deep down, and on the surface too, Dame Groan doesn't believe the IPCC, doesn't accept the science, never has and never will, and thinks talk of tipping points and such like is so much blather ...and so provides another reminder that nothing has changed in the lizard Oz and a little window dressing from the likes of Joe Hildebrand will turn out to be one more example of News Corp heading beyond the valley of the pathetic into the mountains of delusion ...

And so to Dame Groan wrapping up today's effort ...

 

Note how Dame Groan talks of China, India and Russia baulking at suggestions of an exit from coal, as if there's been no baulking in decent, dinkum clean virginal Oz coal loving Murdochian la la land ... as if Barners has never baulked at all this talk of abandoning coal ... and note the skill with which she tosses "hope" in the form of an investment in technology, much as the Bjorn-again one routinely does in the lizard Oz ...

This form of denialism, of inertia, is so built into the reptile system that it can just keep repeating itself, safe in the knowledge that nothing will be done and the world can merrily head off to hell in a handbasket ... 

By the way, did others read in the Graudian Rain fell on Greenland's ice sheet for the first time ever known. Alarms should ring.

Alarms should ring? They spotted sharks at the pond's favourite beach? Yes, the pond is looking forward to visits to the new beach where Marrickville Metro used to be ...

And so to the bonus of the day, and the pond thought it should search out some new blood, even if it's old Tezza blood ...

 

 

Tezza, like Dame Groan, is an old school climate science denialist, with a fierce hatred of furriners, and all that European blather about lifestyles, and such is his fear and loathing of Mathias - he's got a funny accent don't you know and might even be one of them - that the reptiles felt the need to throw in another snap of the demonic beast, confident that it would produce immediate revulsion and disgust in the readership ...

 

 

 

Well the pond neutered that ... but you can't neuter Tezza when he's in a rage, not when virtue-signalling is in the air  ...

 

It goes without saying that Tezza is in the Dame Groan school of climate science denialism, but luckily the reptiles flung in a shot of a saviour to try to calm his shattered nerves ...

 

 

Sorry, not that one, but those with a key eye for gestures will note the similarities with the snap below ...

 

 

 

 

Well after that shot of the saviour in full benediction mode ...

 

 

 

 

... it was time for a final gobbet of Tezza and an unveiling of the the pond's ulterior motive ...

 

 

And so to the punchline. 

Tezza's rage ... which sadly can't be backdated to the days when the reptiles were all agog and excited by Mathias's ascension and the wondrous skill of SloMo on display yet again ... was only put forward by the pond as an elaborate introduction to the Rowe of the day, with more Rowe always to hand here ...