In which the pond has only the usual Monday regulars, the Major and the Oreo ...

 

 

On a Monday the pond is sometimes overwhelmed, what with the dog botherer, the Caterist, the Major and the reformed, recovering feminist all likely be on parade.

But this day only a couple of the usual reptiles turned up for duty ...

 

 

 

It was easy to thank Dame Slap and the Monk for their service, and marveling at Albo mixing with the reptiles was surely enough, and it was too easy to work out why simplistic Simon was so gloomy ...

Tough days for a reptile bogged down in irrelevant polling hell ... and even the usual ABC bashing seemed tepid ...

 

Says it all really, but why would anyone be astonished when a loon prefers the company of a prize loon ...

The pond is shattered that the Caterist seems to have missed the chance to update the world on the role of quarries in the latest floods, but perhaps he was off collecting some federal cash in the paw.

So sorry for the predictability, but it's off for the usual Monday tour of duty with the Major ...

Oops, the pond should have put in a spoiler alert, or at least some kind of warning or alert or siren for that cartoon dribbling, leaking if you will, into the pond, which is usually reserved for proper cartoonists dealing with significant matters ...

 

 

 

Sorry back to the Major and soldiers not acting as backup for state emergency services ... and this time the pond can warn that the reptiles decided to insert a click bait video, carefully neutered by the pond ...

 

 

 

 

 

Hmm, the pond can remember a couple of times when the armed forces "pitched in", without the bullshit and blather of an evasive SloMo, falsely seeking to hide behind the skirts of premiers and chief ministers, and curiously both involved Labor governments ...

 

The 1949 Australian coal strike was the first time that Australian military forces were used during peacetime to break a trade union strike. The strike by 23,000 coal miners lasted for seven weeks, from 27 June 1949 to 15 August 1949, with troops being sent in by the Ben Chifley Federal Labor government to the open cut coal mines in New South Wales on 28 July 1949, with the workers returning to work, defeated, two weeks later.  (wiki)

The dispute severely disrupted domestic air travel in Australia and had a major detrimental impact on the tourism industry and many other businesses. A few days earlier, Labor Prime Minister Bob Hawke declared a national emergency and allowed Royal Australian Air Force planes and pilots and overseas aircraft and pilots to provide services.The RAAF provided limited domestic air services to ease the impact of the dispute. (wiki)

Yes, the defence forces come in pretty handy for those with a hose and not afraid to use it ...

 

Meanwhile on another planet and in a report on bushfires back in 2020 ...

 

 

 

 

 

Not to worry, that leaves plenty of time to drop the hose, and so back to the Major, and spoiler alert, the Major lets a penny drop ...

 

 

 

 

 

Talk about a gigantic butt billy goat butt, dressed up as a venerable "yeti": ""Yes Morrison does seem to have a problem dealing with disasters quickly."

The pond immediately knew the problem. The Major had been influenced by that snap of that white anting, treacherous turncoat, that Karvelas woman ... like Speersie, she had once been a reptile, and like Speersie, like rats everywhere, she had fled the ship, not that you'd know it from a quick survey of what had survived as her reptile legacy ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That's it, that's all she wrote? You had to turn to the ABC, boasting and preening about how it had attracted the rogue from the swamp to walk amongst the cardigans ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh you infidel, you heretic, all beaming at smirking at your betrayal ...
 

Look, here you go again, upsetting the Major and getting him all agitated and talking as if climate science was an actual science, and worst of all to a wretch from the Graudian ...

 

 

 

Phew, what a relief, lucky the Major could slip in the news that it was all just the weather as usual, and nothing to do with climate science, and please, carry on regardless ...

No wonder the reptiles felt the need to fling in a click bait video, carefully neutered by the pond. And with that settled, the Major finally got into his stride ... by quoting the dog botherer and lordy lordy even turning to the savvy Savva so he might discover yet another "yeti"...

 

 

"I am not convinced". Why it's positively Churchillian, the sort of line you might expect from a visionary who can conjure an Order of Lenin medal out of the air.

Indeed, indeed, the Major stands tall and strong and knows how to hold the hose for SloMo ...

The pond wanted to slip in that handy reminder for the speaker in tongues to imaginary friends, before turning to the reformed, recovering feminist, only to discover that the Oreo was sounding very much like the Major ...

Phew, surely the Major would be proud to see one of the world's greatest minds thinking and sounding just like the Major ...

The pond knows the Oreo is one of the hideous 'leet ... why she's been on syllabi ...

 

 

 

 

Harvard? What would the Major think of having that sort of hideous symbol of the 'leet out and about in reptile la la land?

Never mind, back to the Oreo, preferring to blame the victim, because that's what reptiles do ...

Marvelous, and that reference to substance use and abuse was particularly splendid, especially as it was accompanied by that particularly reptile notion, "behaviour modification".

Meanwhile, the pond must unfortunately order the immediate evacuation of Sydney's poverty stricken northern suburbs. Sadly there have been far too many times that fires have threatened impecunious residents. The pond remembers 1994 only too well ...

A fire was reported in the northern end of the Lane Cove National Park on 6 January. The blaze went on to consume 320 hectares of the Park and burn down 13 houses in 48 hours, racing down the river valley impacting West Pymble, West Killara, Lindfield, Macquarie Park, and the Northern Suburbs Crematorium.

Yes, Pymble and Lindfield folk, poverty stricken as you are, your time is up, and you must decamp for safer ground ...

Oh, and a little behaviour modification is probably in order too, because if you can turn a rabid feminist into a rabid ratbag scribbling for the lizard Oz, surely any form of behaviour modification is possible ... and the next thing you know, you can be sounding just like the Major and berating green-left media, and placard-waving folk, and there you go, the irony of feminists, with the Oreo apparently unaware of the irony of being an Oreo ...

A serving of Oreos (three cookies) contains about 10% of your daily recommended IRONY intake. Huh?? That’s right. Milk’s favorite cookie has irony. (with a minor adjustment, here, but watch out for the fat and the sugar and the hydrogenated oil, because too much irony can lead to cardiac arrest, here).

Oh just fuck off, or perhaps head off to Nimbin with that sort of survivalist talk ... and while you're at it, make sure you have enough in the grab and go bag as you race off to your personally responsible bug out ...

As for the pond, it's not too much to ask for a government to act responsibly and quickly and competently, and to act like a government, instead of dropping the hose ... or providing fodder for cartoonists of the immortal Rowe kind, with more always here ...