In which jolly Joe feuds with the bromancer, and the Oreo can't fool the lizard Oz readership ...

 

 

Every so often, the pond has this fantasy of abandoning the reptiles, and going over to the dark side ... where important, thorny, difficult ethical questions are asked ... such is, what is the value of a vice-chancellor's life? 

 

Everybody in reptile la la land thinks that vice-chancellors, as a tribe, have combined to ruin universities in Australia, and should be shot on sight ... and yet, perhaps there is a case for thinking there's some value in a vice-chancellor. Perhaps in their dotage they could be wheeled into aged care homes and given a shot of the virus, and thereby die in agony, and so serve as a useful warning to vulgar youff. Yes, it would be interesting to see if anyone could make a case for pickling Vice Chancellors, as a way, at least, of avoiding terrible movies, of the kind that puts the pond in a pickle ...

Instead the pond has to be content with the intellectual giants that roam the lizard Oz, and what do you know, with the Major not on view this day, who should confront the pond but jolly Joe offering a firecracker of an insight into the US elections ...

 

Of course President Pelosi is a meme designed to terrify straying sheep into voting for the Donald, and it's mystifying why anyone would bother with that angle down under. Sundry pundits have taken pot-shots at the logic and the very long odds behind it, but we're dealing with Jolly Joe here ... anxious to spread chaos, confusion and controversy ...

 

How mindless is it to read jolly Joe? Well in his last outing he rabbited on about Betty Bankstown and Mary Milwaukee and her family, and now she's returned so he can keep banging on about her ... because once Joe's got a moronic, condescending metaphor in hand, buggered if he's going to let go of it ...

And so on to budgetary matters, and here the pond must cede ground, because no one knows how to do a budget like jolly Joe ... oh for the glory years, and the onion muncher, and the craziness and the chaos and the controversy and, yes, the humour too ...

 

 

And so on to Joe's budget-crunching today, because by golly the lad still hasn't lost it ... and sure the confused lizard Oz editorial process has thrown up jolly Joe like an undigested dog's breakfast, but please enjoy the craziness of it all ...

 

 

We are living in crazy times? And no mention of the carefully stacked Supreme Court sorting things out in a timely Bushian manner?

 

Last time the reptiles were content to mention that jolly Joe's claim to fame was that he was ambassador to the US for four years. This time they've corrected their error, done the right thing, and put in a plug for jolly Joe's advisory firm Bondi Partners ...

 

Things must really be slow at advisory firm Bondi Partners ...

Our team provides discreet counsel, high-level partnerships and tailored solutions to achieve goals on both sides of the Pacific.
 
We exist to ensure our clients are equipped to handle oncoming hurdles, forecast potential opportunities, communicate effectively and thrive in competitive markets. Through our extensive government, corporate and political experience, Bondi Partners helps clients make sense of increasingly complicated geopolitical and economic landscapes.
 
You might say we’re corporate air traffic controllers.

 

Or you might say we're builders of another corporate Boeing 737 Max, or perhaps furious scribblers for the lizard Oz.

 

Luckily the pond has a cartoon which will help explain what jolly Joe has been saying, with Mary making it clear ...

The pond is frequently slow on a Monday morning, and it took some time to realise it had been trolled by the reptiles. They really only included jolly Joe so that the pond could appreciate the nuanced, tremendously insightful work of the bromancer ...

 

The moment the pond read the bromancer scribbling furiously the chance "to cement his legacy as a profoundly important, historical president", the pond knew it had wasted its time with Joe, though it also had to resist the urge to scribble a variation, "to cement his legacy as a profoundly important, historical Führer und Reichskanzler"....

 

 

You see? Classic bromancer! Ginsburg was a wholly admirable woman, yet she was at the same time a thoroughly despicable, a left liberal judge incapable of abiding by the letter of the constitution and the law, one who wasted time interpreting social mores to suit her outrageous left liberal bias ... 

What we need is a good Catholic woman who will take us back to the good old days of the Catholic church in the 1950s, if somehow we can manage to sort out those wretched left liberal progressives who think women should control their bodies, instead of priests and the bromancer ... (oh and get rid of those gay weddings,  so that priests can get back to doing a bit of loving in private) ...

 

Oh sorry, the pond got a bit ahead of itself. The pond should have talked of Cyrus the Builder and delivered endless bullshit about the wonders of the Donald as a builder who always paid his contractors, and created a university even better than the Ramsay centre, before getting on to Catholic paranoia ...

 

Luckily the pond had a cartoon to help readers understand what the bromancer was really saying ...

 

And so to the bonus of the day, reformed, recovering feminist, the Oreo, apparently trying to troll the lizard Oz readership ...

 

Labor could still be a force?  Surely not, trolling Oreo, surely this is the force ...

Here for that image ... though it probably misses the point. Last night the pond was speaking in tongues, and scored a hint that the rapture would certainly arrive by 2040, and so all this talk of 2050 targets was supremely irrelevant, and soon enough we'd all be in heaven writing One-Star Yelp reviews (sorry, might be inside the paywall, give it a go, waddya got to lose?) ...

 

Yet again the pond was slow to understand, it being Monday, that it was being trolled, and yet after the trolling, the Oreo did try to explain, with a straight reformed, recovering feminist face, how Joel might yet prevail, and the Labor party made safe for coal and Xians ...

 

Sorry, reformed, recovering feminist, but the readership of the lizard Oz wasn't buying it. When you've been drinking the kool aid for so long, there's nothing to be found in an Oreo offering loads of sugar and heaps of cherry cola fizz...

 

Take it away readership, sock it to the Oreo ...

 

Sorry reformed recovering feminist, all that talk of pro-coal realists can't hide the reality that you're out of touch, and the talk these days should be of pro-gas realists, even if you misunderstand the concept of SloMo gaseousness, and mistake the astonishing power of gas for a few verbal farts into the atmosphere ...

Well the pond has already belled that "force to be reckoned with" cat thanks to the mindless kool aid sipping lizard Oz readership, but why not do it again, because come 2040, we'll all be in raptures, or at least marvelling at the visions achieved by SloMo's mob ... because we're not Mary from Maitland, we're average Joes from deep in the belly of the Murdochian beast ...

And so, with all thoughts of the reformed, recovering feminist wiped from the pond's mind thanks to the lizard Oz readership's ability to recreate Jonestown just before a drinking session, it was time for a Rowe image, with more Rowe here ... and if the rough beast hadn't yet slouched towards the election to be born, then it had, with its blank and pitiless gaze, at least slumped into the chair ...