In which the pond gets sodden in the public bar with Peta ...

The Terrorists seem to have been so shocked by Miranda the Devine's piece in favour of the Donald that they wheeled in Akker Dakker early. 

Triggs bashing is so much more seemly and appropriate ...but even the fat owl of the remove had been whisked away by lunch time, no doubt to aid the digestion of readers unused to taking a trip to the tuckshop with the pond's favourite Bunter ...

Unfortunately this left the pond with nowhere to turn but Peta, who also, in her syndicated way, turned out for the HUNsters ...

Now, at a time when Pauline Hanson, Derryn Hinch, the recently lost but much mourned Bob Day, the peculiar press conference-giving Rod Culleton, the redoubtable Cory and many others make up the chaotic, unrepresentative swill that is the Senate, the pond marvels at the notion that Trump hasn't already happened in Australia.

Perhaps not in size ... after all Clive Palmer was a low-rent dinosaur from the get go, but there are many who honour the spirit of the Donald ...

Let's overlook former lower house contenders like Erica, and gorgeous northern George or chairman Rudd, a man of many talents, none of them to do with governing a country, so we can wonder why Peta ignored her very own candidate in a Donald Trump lookalike competition ...

Oh okay, the pond is always naked in its intent.

The only reason it decided to run with Peta is so it could run some of its most loved onion muncher snaps, because mindless equivalence doesn't love much room for anything else ...

Uh huh. Here it comes, the standard cursory nod to the notion that the Donald might have a few problems, followed by the extended slamming of the Clintons, a routine which - if she wins - will ensure that the United States is going to be paralysed for the next four years, and the president, rather than the obstructive houses and feral, destructive Republicans, will cop the blame ...

Now there's much that might be said about all this, and the usual guff about the elites - this from a well-heeled onetime member of the Canberra elite, a failed martinet who ran a failed PM's office - but the pond will be content to note the dumbing down involved in calling Anthony Weiner "a former MP". 

When in Rome, the pond likes to speak Roman, or at least school Latin, so why isn't it possible to call Weiner a former Congressman, which is what he actually was? They don't talk about members of parliament in the United States. (He was also an unsuccessful candidate for mayor of New York, a campaign caught in an excellent documentary ...)

Yes, the pond will even overlook the usual bullshit talk about the Murdoch press - the dominant form of print media in Australia - leaning towards the left and so having a natural antipathy to the Donald, when in reality the likes of the Bolter, the Devine, Moorice and sundry others in the 'leet reptile ranks have seized the Donald moment to yet again ritually bash the elites of which they are a part ...

That's because we need the room to be able to run a few favourite snaps showing the 'leets busy with the pomp and ceremony they just love to pieces ...

Yes, it couldn't have got any sillier than that, and still she says we haven't been graced already by our very own version of a Donald in our midst ...

What gets the pond is how someone can make basic mistakes in demographic analysis, though when one reflects on how Peta Credlin fucked up her time in power it begins to make sense ...

The middle class might be getting squeezed in the United States, but the biggest demographic group supporting the Donald consists of alienated angry white working class men without a college education ... and thanks to the changing US fortunes in relation to China and manufacturing, consequently without the means or wherewithal to re-train and get a different kind of job ...

Race and sex and age are other great divides (though you can throw in the KKK and other white supremacists if you like for a bit of flavouring), but of course contemplating the actual reality - pored over endlessly by pollsters and poll trackers in the United States, as at WaPo here - would get in the road of the Credlin's mindless ability to rant about arrogant leftist commentariats lording it over ordinary people ...

That's like a billionaire saying he gives a flying fuck about the dropkick losers he's screwed.

That sort of delusional nonsense is one of the reasons that the onion muncher lost the plot and thought that associating with a cabal of right wing members of the reptile Murdochian commentariat was the way to go. 

Way not ... though he did try to pass the Donald pub test by perving on a barmaid ...

But the more Peta prattles on, the more she limits the amount of pictures the pond can run ...

And now, reluctantly, it's back to Peta.

Almost everyone under the sun has at some time assured the pond that while Peta and the onion muncher fucked up big in Canberra, Peta has reinvented herself as a fearless and astute commentator, scribbling without favour ...

They never add that she also scribbles without the benefit of insight ... and with the same sort of backward looking love of coal and hate of renewables that guaranteed the onion muncher's irrelevance when it came to the future of Australia, or for that matter, the planet ...

Yes, and feeling good about your monstrous stupidity will feel really strange if we manage to fuck over the planet in the ways that climate science is currently predicting.

So when Peta tells me that all the pond has to do is leave its leafy suburb ...

Oh okay, that was a few years ago ... they took a Peta attitude to trees in those days in the inner west, just like we did in Tamworth. Allow the pond to shed a tear at the memory of a mother who never went without an axe in her hand ...

Right, tissues have worked ... and apparently all the pond has to do its leave its leafy suburb - because trees are bad and not having them is a sign of working class authenticity, please chop down any offending tree within eyeshot, uproot all other foliage and concrete over the yard - and sit down in a front bar - because beer-sodden angry old white men are the repository of innate truth - and just listen to their drunken, angry, bitter, resentful ranting, and the pond will discover that there are nascent Trumps in the land ...

Clearly Peta never grew up in Tamworth, where they weren't called front bars, they were called public bars, and the only public that could go into them were men.

Go on, you fancy yourself as somebody up on the pub test and pub culture and pub history and all that six o'clock swill mindless drunken debauched crap ... here, just watch out for stray walri up from the south ...

The main bar of the typical Australian pub, usually the largest, was the so-called "Public Bar". However, this title was an ironic misnomer, since until the 1970s, only men were permitted to drink in Public Bars.

As if that irony is any bloody fucking news at all ... thanks unto Tamworthian Donalds for the language ... and the pond understands from primary sources that you could get plenty of received wisdom, of the "get a bloody haircut ya fucking poofter, and go kill some gooks" kind ... It was enough to turn the pond Methodist with the uptight aunt.

We routinely have our Trumps here ... and the Murdochian media has routinely supported them.

But one at least was sent packing, and pretty quik stix too ...

And then the pond remembered that, thanks be unto google and blogger, the space it had was relatively unlimited. 

It could run as much absurd nonsense as it liked, and throw together as many amusing snaps as might make up a bulging family photo album ... though some might think the pond has thrown in a ring-in, they all look like dead ringer doofuses to the pond ...