Tim Blair, Jonathan Holmes, Media Watch and puking over wayward possums ...

(Above: all the cats that are fit to print. A screen cap of the Daily Terror at its finest).

This little gem of wit and irony recently popped out of the Tim Blair archive, wherein it lurked in Blair's Daily Terror blog under the header He Has His Reasons:

Whenever people complain about Media Watch host Jonathan Holmes being smug, condescending, or arrogant, I always tell them: “Well, maybe you would be smug, too, if you’d won a Victoria Cross and the Tour de France in the same year. And maybe you would be a little condescending if you’d devised an inexpensive water purification method with life-saving applications throughout the Third World and also a failsafe courtroom gambit to defeat all speeding charges. And maybe you would be arrogant as well if you’d knocked out Evander Holyfield in a street fight and secured a world-first interview with the Hidden Imam.”

Mind you, I’m not aware that Holmes has actually done any of these things, but he must have come terribly close. Otherwise he’s just some English bloke hosting a dull 15-minute TV show, in which case acting so very superior just makes no sense at all.

Translation for the unsophisticated: ya boo, ya suck eggs, ya pommie bastard. Which inspired a similar level of wit and irony at the pond:

Whenever people complain about Murdoch Daily Terror blogger Tim Blair being smug, condescending, or arrogant, I always tell them: “Well, maybe you would be smug, too, if you’d won a Victoria Cross and the Indy 500 in the same year. And maybe you would be a little condescending if you’d devised an inexpensive water purification method with life-saving applications throughout the Third World and also a failsafe courtroom gambit to defeat all speeding charges, not to mention providing unimpeachable scientific evidence that global warming was a myth. And maybe you would be arrogant as well if you’d knocked out Evander Holyfield in a street fight and secured a world-first interview with the Hidden Imam instead of simply whining about Islamics on a daily basis and doing snippets of trivia to feed your trolls.”

Mind you, I’m not aware that Blair has actually done any of these things, but he must have come terribly close. Otherwise he’s just some dinkum dodo bloke hosting a dull ratbag blog targeted at riff raff and ne'er do wells with suspect literacy levels, in which case acting so very superior just makes no sense at all.

Translation for the unsophisticated: ya boo, ya suck eggs, ya Murdoch blogging hack.

Dearie me, it's always good to start off the day with an elevated, sophisticated level of discussion and debate and meaningful argument, as always inspired by the commentariat, and a sure sign that civilisation is relentlessly advancing.

Still I'm assured by those who know that tonight is Friday night football night, and that the new rule is the same as the old rule: always play the man, and bugger the ball.

Meanwhile, you're just three sleeps away from the next Media Watch program, which you can also see online here, which is so dull it always seems to infuriate Murdoch media hacks, and brings out the hoppy toads and spiteful snakes like a refreshing rain storm. What fun.

Martin King: Would you eat possum pie, Wendy?

Caller Wendy: Well I'd try it and see what it's like if we have to but I mean what else can you do when there's an awful lot of road kill out here. Mainly the males at the moment, because when there's changeover from, it buggers up their body-clock, you know, these daylight savings back to Eastern Standard Time...

— Melbourne Talk Radio (MTR), Drive with Martin King, 27th April, 2010

But at least the possum pie will give her the strength to fix the fading in the curtains caused by daylight saving.

Now all she needs to do is read Tim Blair for his latest insights into the world of science ...

By the way, when in New Zealand, you might like to try Pete's possum pies and pate.

They have a thing about possums in New Zealand, a bit like Blair's thing about Holmes. Pete also does a mean possum pie, and I'm told here that the Puke pub serves possum. We will resist the obvious ... after all, this is loon pond, not Tim Blair.