Forget Mr Potato Head's Xmas penis ... what about the underwear being flourished by SloMo and the reptiles?

 

 

 

 

The pond can't begin to explain the overwhelming sense of relief to be back online, away from FTA, and ready to share a moment with Colbert's graphics department ...

Of course there's a downside, and the pond isn't just talking about Jesusween or Mr Potato Head's Xmas penis, the pond now has duties to perform, and do they come more burdensome and onerous than contemplating the thoughts of nattering "Ned"?

 

 

 

Even here, however, there's a fun part, roughly equivalent to watching reptiles wriggle on their own hook, years in the making ...

 

 

 

But enough of the graphics, on with the wriggling, and please "Ned" make it a first class wriggle, worthy of a podcast that might be sounded out in your sonorous voice ...

 

 

What's wrong with Barner's voice? Why in the good old days, they were as one ...

 

 

 

Ah, but now the reptiles have adopted a new tack, in both the tree killer and the digital edition ...

 

 

 

So SloMo is going to save the planet, and save your coal jobs, and no doubt prefer to wear his undergarments on display on the outside while doing the saving...

 

 

Oh indeed, indeed ...

 

 

Well to be fair to "Ned", it's desperate times, so he kept it shortish ...

 

Uh huh, so how did the punters take to "Ned's" blithe backflipping? 

The pond could only afford the time and space for a short random sampling, but it looks like its going to be a hard sell to the lizard Oz base ... 

 

 

 

Good old nukes, and the new cult, and so on and so forth, and here the pond should pause to note what it isn't covering this day ...

 

 

There you go, Tezza going full nuke, and the Swiss bank account man explaining why we should realise what happens on the Gold Coast must stay on the Gold Coast, and don't you dare harm sweet innocent Gladys, and the Doddster yammering on about free speech, because the reptiles can't ever shut up about it ...

But the pond was drawn to the notion that climate science was a new religion, a new cult, because that's been in the reptile lexicon for decades, and sure enough it's still a favourite ...

 

Dear sweet long absent lord, how little this ponce has to be proud of ... and even worse, before proceeding, the pond should note another reptile given up to pay heed to his blather ...

The pond could write that one in its IPA approved sleep ... activist judges, ice buckets on lawyers, yadda yadda ... (though it turns out that it's just going to be a new split, and yes, the pond would get out of bed for a 30% slice of the action).

Sorry Dame Slap, you were once great, back in your "Lord" Monckton, world government courtesy climate science by Xmas days, but now it's time for the new religion, the new cult!

Say what? Not a hint of "Ned's" podcast, yet the reptiles have an AG podcast? Dear long absent lord, here's hoping it gets things right ...

 

 

Okay, okay, the pond isn't having a debate, a discussion, an argument or whatever here. The pond is just wallowing in cartoons, and the fun of being back, and seeing assorted loons writhe on assorted hooks of their own making ...

 

Talk about comedy stylings! We are at the coalface of it for want of a better word! Could Gina or the IPA or Barners have put it better?

It was more than enough for the pride of the Littles, and all that was left was a brief coda ...

 

Yes, yes, coal is still the answer ... and poor sweet innocent dinkum clean virginal Oz coal has been cruelly demonised, because when all you know is a religious cult, that's the only way you know how to speak ...

 

The pond suspected all this had been going down in its absence, and yet it was still haunted by the fate of one famous reptile warrior. 

Of late, Lloydie of the Amazon has rarely been seen or heard from, and when the pond went looking, in an anxious, nervous way, it thought it found what had been the Amazon man's last outing ... 

And so the pond couldn't help itself, and decided to do a little dumpster diving ...

Just a little, because some goods can be a little stale or tasteless ...

 

Eek, it's five days old, well past its use-by date, but look, there's the return of the cult master. Who could complain?

And Lloydie of the Amazon poured his heart into the piece - in total, including the cult master, there's seven whole gobbets ... so there's no rest for the faint-hearted if the Amazon is to be saved yet again ...

 

 

Yes, yes, if a dictatorship can help fuck the planet, why shouldn't we join in?

 

Nukes! Why didn't the pond think of it? It's the new reptile chant, from Tezza to Lloydie of the Amazon, and it will make SloMo's modelling look exceptional ...

 

Oh the bloody underwear and he's probably going to wear it on the outside, as super folk are wont to do ...

As always, there's more Rowe modelling here, but meanwhile the pond must push on, because Lloydie of the Amazon has much FUD to push ...

 

The pond's heart almost broke reading Lloydie's words, and that talk of cynical big business ...

Who could imagine a business so corrupt, who could imagine a business seizing on a transition in the belief that it was paved with gold, good intentions and power?

 

 

Oh right, that mob, recently celebrated in Media Watch ...

It must be hard for Lloydie of the Amazon. He was the most expert of the reptiles when it came to generating FUD, dissembling, confusing and conflating, but thank the long absent lord, there's still a home for his skills ...

 

Good old beefy boofhead Angus, still checking up on the source for his figures for that missive to the Mayor. Of course he's just the man to reference Operation Market Garden ... we all know how that bridge too far played out, and oh how the new religion will likely offer a mass burial at Oosterbeek ... or wherever, perhaps Glasgow ...

And so to more saucy doubts and fears, in the patented Lloydie way ...

Indeed, indeed, those bloody fiendish and cunning orientals, cornering the greenie markets and electric vehicles and such like, while the reptiles were out playing bowls, or should that be coals, with Drake ...

Of course SloMo's government has shown how it's done, what with its tremendous trend-setting fleet of EVs for pollies and fat cat cardigan wearers ... a big enough order to inspire a local EV industry ...

Oh wait, the pond must still be suffering from delusions and the PTSD induced by that lightning strike that sent it offline ...

And so to a final gobbet of splendid equivocation and uncertainty ... as only Lloydie of the Amazon can do ...

 

 

How could the pond have doubted?  Sure, there was a little stink in the dumpster, but the dive was well worth it. 

Lloydie of the Amazon still knows how to deliver, and the pond will do its best to keep track of him, even if the reptiles try to hide him in the forlorn Bjorn corner, blathering about the need to invest in carbon-capture storage solutions, apparently yet to be invented, but no matter, invest away, because beefy boofhead Angus knows how to invest ... just ask his family and friends...

And with that, how better to end than with an infallible Pope? And what do you know, forget the underwear, by this stage of the reptile game, we're into bare bums ...