The Terror in terror, the Fairfaxians rampant, oh deary me, what's a reptile to do?
Oh what a stern and unhappy woman she is, not a hint of a smile, a frowning harridan ... but will it be enough?
Can the reptiles yet achieve what they managed for SSM? Or will Black Knight syndrome prevail yet again?
Who knows, who can tell, who can say? Certainly not the reptiles ...
The reptiles are in a state of uproar and agitation this day, confused and bickering amongst themselves ...
Oh deary, deary, so many voices, some shouting about dinosaurs, some confessing to being donkeys - as if no one knew - so what's a blogger to do ...
There can be only one answer, no dilly dallying, cut right to the heart of it, channel Pat Benatar, sing 'hit me with your best shot, why don't you hit me with your best shot, fire away ...'
Yes, bring on prattling Polonius, the star of the centrefold, that'll lay 'em in the aisles, and put an end to the rancour and all debating points ... what a star he is ...
Australia has Abbott to thank?
Of course it does. He did it for all of us, but especially for his sister ... please, allow Polonius to explain in an epic prattle ...
Indeed, indeed, the pond can only thank the onion muncher for the vital role that he played ...
And what's more, unlike that damned Malware and those devious Labor poseurs, all trying to claim the glory and the credit, he did it and then he played a vital role in the campaign, one worth celebrating ...
Let's ignore the idle chat that it was a last cynical throw of the dice, a way of avoiding responsibility, a way of hoping against hope that perhaps fundamentalist Catholicism and homophobia might yet triumph, and at some considerable expense, and celebrate the onion muncher's astonishing achievements ...
And who better to do the panegyric, the eulogy, a fulsome bout of praise that might only offend some because of using this meaning for 'fulsome' ...
Let this Pliny of our times remind us that the Trajan onion muncher did it all with a remarkable generosity of spirit and hope ...
Indeed, indeed, there's nothing like love, love of others and love of self, and love spreading out into the world in a gracious and seemly way ...
Remember, he did it all for his sister, or perhaps the harmony of the spheres, and what a positive role he played ...
Come on reptiles, liven up Polonius's prattle with another lively illustration ...
Indeed, indeed, it's got absolutely nothing to do with your average Anglo Christian. It was all the fault of the wogs with their funny weird bunch of creeds and faiths ...
Damn you fashionable inner-city intelligentsia, with your humble institute lurking in the heart of Sydney's CBD, it wasn't your average fundamentalist Catholic, which is why the onion muncher bunged it on ... to please his sister.
How was he to know that the wogs and all those bloody Buddhists, Hindus, Sikhs and Muslims would turn out so negative, while your average fundamentalist Catholic homophobe would turn out to be tremendously positive, and doing their best for their gay sisters and brothers?
Clearly we need a little more re-education ...
Damn you fashionable inner-city intelligentsia, with your humble institute lurking in the heart of Sydney's CBD, it wasn't your average fundamentalist Catholic, which is why the onion muncher bunged it on ... to please his sister.
How was he to know that the wogs and all those bloody Buddhists, Hindus, Sikhs and Muslims would turn out so negative, while your average fundamentalist Catholic homophobe would turn out to be tremendously positive, and doing their best for their gay sisters and brothers?
Clearly we need a little more re-education ...
Yes, we all have the onion muncher and prattling Polonius to thank, and don't you forget it, and now can we just let the onion muncher get back to one of his traditional pastimes ...
OMG DP, the former Chairman is calling for an enquiry into the current Chairman!
ReplyDeletehttps://www.thesaturdaypaper.com.au/news/politics/2017/11/18/exclusive-rudd-calls-news-corp-inquiry/15109236005520
Wouldn't it be nice, We need a torch & pitchfork moment. Fifield can say what he likes, at some point things become self evident - especially crappy broadband.
DeleteThe Polonius polemical is altogether too political.
ReplyDeleteTo find a way to praise Tony is by far the furthest he can go
In the exercise of his wondrous gusto.
Never daunted, never humoured, never leftist and never nihilist
This doyen of the right must find a way to lift the onion muncher
And bring home the bacon.
Yes - the reptiles are only causing chaos to ensure we fully appreciate any tiny progress that is made. Apart from the fact that it is not in law yet, the passing of a bill with such popular appeal shouldn't be a remarkable event. It is only the regressive nature of post-Abbott politics that makes it a big deal.
ReplyDeleteReports Karen Middleton over at The Saturday Paper, “I would suspect that those that have been so opposed to this need to be very careful and need to reflect on the wishes of their own constituency before they start becoming too difficult,” Warren Entsch said.
ReplyDeleteReports Prattling Polonious: we need to thank Tony Abbott a man whose constituency smashed him.
I don't recall ever getting whiplash as bad as I did this morning trying to make sense of the reptiles. In their little coddled corner of the world, no view is impossible.
Oscillating Fan: "The values of most Australians have changed ..."
ReplyDeleteNow I know you haven't got time or space or presence for the OscFan today, DP, but that little quote from him has finally woken me up, at least a bit. And especially where he goes on to say "...even as many of their elected representatives cling on to outdated beliefs."
Now I can't clearly remember quite when I first became a convinced agnostic - I did go to Sunday school for a little while at my Father's insistence (a gentle deist, or freethinker as they were called then), but as best I can remember I was agnostic while still my age was a single digit. Therefore, I have never taken this religious nonsense the least bit seriously. It was just another one of those multitudes of group archoses that 'bedevilled' an attempt at sane existence.
Therefore, I never quite grasped that lots of people apparently took "religion" very seriously - especially in terms of the rights and freedom of the belief in, and practice of, religious faith.
So, when the 'no religion' count in the census started to climb - to 29.6% in 2016 - it didn't really register with me how big a change this is: matters of religion, religious faith and religious practice are no longer a protected category. So just because something is classified as 'religious' does not accord it any privileges.
Thus 'religious freedom' is no more privileged than 'freedom from dsicrimination', and a cake maker can't claim 'religious freedom' as a justification for intolerant bigotry to others of different characteristics.
Oh, that really is a big change: no wonder The Muncher and the conservative legions don't want to acknowledge or recognise it - or even admit its existence. I shall have to pay closer attention in future.