In which our hole in the bucket man routs the dangerous fiends from the north ...

 

 

 

 

What a whiz idea. With the war on China not going terribly well, send in famous warrior hole in the bucket Henry, to rout the oriental fiends with talk of ancient Greece and Thucydides ... because there's nothing like setting a Thucydides Trap to ensure we're on the way to peace ...

 

Take it away hole in the bucket warrior man ...

 

Now there are some that might think the pond sold our Henry as a false bill of goods. Sure there's talk of Virgil and George Orwell, and not a single mention of the astonishing number of lies peddled by the Donald on Twitter and celebrated by the reptiles, with the grift and the hustle still going on at this very moment...

Here, have some ancient wisdom, it'll help settle the nerves ...

故曰：知彼知己，百戰不殆；不知彼而知己，一勝一負；不知彼，不知己，每戰必殆。
Hence the saying: If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.

Let's face it, if Sun Tzu is good enough for Gordon Gekko, he's good enough for the pond, but please, have faith, the pond is certain Thucydides will arrive and save us in the nick of time ...

 

Oh dear, Henry's decided to take a comprador walk on the rent boy wild side ... perhaps a little more wisdom before Thucydides arrives to settle the matter?

兵者，詭道也。故能而示之不能，用而示之不用，近而示之遠，遠而示之近。
All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when we are able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must appear inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near.

Now get to it ancient Greeks, you have much work to do ...

 

Put it another way ...

The skillful leader subdues the enemy's troops without any fighting; he captures their cities without laying siege to them; he overthrows their kingdom without lengthy operations in the field. With his forces intact he will dispute the mastery of the Empire, and thus, without losing a man, his triumph will be complete.

Or put it in an immortal Rowe cartoon way, so the pond can understand it ...

 

 

And so to a shocking piece of heresy the pond thought would never turn up in the lizard Oz. 

Our Lloydie has been quiet of late, and the Riddster barely sighted, what with him having important business with One Nation, Pauline and Mark ... but still, the bald-faced effrontery of it, egad sir or madam, it took the pond's breath away ...

 

 

The UN? The UN! Egad sir, or madam, it has been an article of faith at the pond ever since Dame Slap scribbled it straight from the "Lord" Monckton mouth that the UN was using climate change to establish a world government by Xmas 2009. What on earth would they know of the reef?

 

What's this? The reptiles have put up a videographic, which won't play in a screen cap, with images of the reef, and talk of climate peril? 

Where's the expert climate science of the dog botherer when it's urgently needed? Where are the other reptiles, idly standing by while this vile heresy is published? Where is Dame Slap herself in this hour of need?

 

Continuing to decline? And published without a hint of defiance and denialism? 

And that's when the pond fainted, before picking itself up to note that the reptiles were peddling a video with the outrageous line "climate change is already here and it's getting worse", and citing the CSIRO and BOM, as if they'd know anything, up against the expertise of Dame Slap, the dog botherer, the Riddster, and even nattering "Ned" occasionally mentioning talk of "climate alarmism" and the need for ongoing debate as to the wonders of fossil fuels and the uselessness of renewables ... and how splendid it is to fuck over Narrabri ... because let's face it, it's not mighty Tamworth, and what happens in the west should stay in the west ...

 

 

 

The pond has absolutely no idea why that 1.5 figure was featured. Thanks to the reptiles' mighty efforts, that figure is but a dream, and 2.0 a fading memory ... we're on our way, and what a wild ride it will be. Thanks reptiles ...

And that would usually be it, but the pond wanted to report on the reptiles' ongoing fixation with a self-help guru who has shown the way forward for young people ...

Jordan Peterson has been forced to pursue “emergency” drug detox treatment in Russia after getting hooked on highly addictive psychoactive anti-anxiety drugs, his daughter has said.

The Canadian psychologist, who has attracted a substantial far-right following, has withdrawn from the public eye due to his spiralling addiction to benzodiazepines.

Withdrawal symptoms of benzodiazepines, which include Valium, Xanex and others, include acute anxiety, panic attacks, vomiting, insomnia, muscle twitches, headaches, paranoia, memory loss and in the most extreme instances seizures which can cause death.

It was thought that Dame Slap and Caroline Overinghaham would lead the way in praising the guru, fresh from his benzo high with a new book, but for some strange reason, the reptiles have outsourced their enthusiasm ...

 

 

 

Why Peterson, why now? Well the pond can think of at least one reason. The United States each day reaches new heights, or depths, as you like, of loonacy, which is vastly entertaining, or unnerving, as you like, and the reptiles have averted their eyes from the folly ...

 

 

 

Up against channeling Humpty Dumpty and seeing dead people and zombies everywhere and an urgent need for cash in the paw, send your cash to fight election fraud now, safe and secure in the knowledge it will be used to line pockets - Donald Trump's latest grift may be his most cynical yet -  where's the harm in a few words from a benzo junkie?

 

Indeed, indeed, but what of poor Donald himself? Has his behaviour already been forgotten, his triumphs erased?

 

Never mind, the insights of a benzo junkie will fix those assorted injustices, and maybe even help with the grift and the carnie con ...

Quick, get your dose of truth and terrifyingly accurate insight now ...

Sorry, that's another cruel pond trick. It's just a screen cap, there's no link to that terrifying truth, that astonishing insight, because you can't handle the truth or the benzo insights or the benzo highs. 

Here, have a final gobbet and be content ...

 

A clear moral vision? Thank the long absent lord you won't cop any of that shit from your average evangelical or Sydney 'complimentary women' Anglican or Donald-loving Xian ... and if the pond might be so bold, a word to the reptiles about your outsourcing. 

You need a few more in-house loons, because the imports are piss weak ...

But speaking of clear moral visions, the pond would like to end in its usual way, with an infallible Pope, and a Wilcox ...