The pond was astonished to see this sort of heresy creep into the lizard Oz.
Clearly Gupta should say a few Our Fathers and Hail Marys or be forced to imbibe a goodly dose of Dame Groan carrying on today top of the digital opinion page in her usual Groanish way …
Meanwhile, the art of distraction is in full cry, thanks to the Donald …
Who's the most demented wasn't quite clear - the pond had always thought that using caps was a form of DEMENTED ANGRY BARKING MAD SHOUTING AT CLOUDS AND IRANIANS - but Troy turned up suitably distracted …
Meanwhile the reptiles continued in a state of moral panic about the Sudanese - they're black you know and therefore quite frightening - and the state of the cities …
And by the sheerest good luck, all these moral panics and distractions set the scene for the Caterist this day …that, and the usual moral panic at the ABC …
Naturally the Caterist was on top of this and ready to quash it, in the same way the Caterist routinely smashed diabetes sufferers blathering on about sugary drinks into the stands ...
Indeed, indeed … this reassuring message helpfully subsidised by the federal government …
It's remarkable how a simplistic reductionist mind can reduce any argument about anything to a state of moral panic, and the Caterist, it has to be said with proper admiration, has exactly the right sort of moronic mind necessary to ascribe moral panic to any and all forms of scientific endeavour ...
Now everyone has their favourite shot of plastics in abundance … this one from Bangladesh in 2018 is very appealing …
In fact The Atlantic flung together some 32 glorious snaps in celebration of world environment day, here, and strangely made the gallery scroll down, rather than putting the images on single pages as click bait …
The reptiles didn't bother with any of that sort of nonsense, and instead offered the Caterist the benediction of a Krygsman …
Now the pond has had long arguments that run deep into the night as to whether Krygsman is a lesser Lobbecke, or if he's more like a mystical example of the coeternal consubstantial - hypostases if you will - that can be found in the holy trinity …
Surely Krygsman's conjuring of a plastic bag in the shape of a loose tooth or a bogeyman is an image worthy of Lobbecke, and certainly a rich introduction to the sublime world of the Caterist ...
Speaking of the art of distraction, see how the Caterist moves from one-use plastic straws to the inherent decency of plastics. Who could mock such a noble substance, contributing to fewer warehouse back injuries as it does …
The pond attempted to discover the source of this Caterist thinking but sadly could only come up with this example of grocery warehousing ergonomics here …
But what to do with a piece that doesn't offer a single footnote?
As for landfill, the poor possums here clearly need the advice of a waste management expert such as the Caterist …
But enough of this, it's time for some pure undiluted Caterism of a kind which has proven a boon to the world's oceans ...
Indeed, indeed, luminous minds of the Nietzschean kind can testify to the virtues of death by syphilis, allowing that the humble lad might have been shamelessly traduced, and the moral panic surrounding HIV still continues to astonish the pond, given the many easy early deaths produced …
Oh okay, instead of using leaden irony and low-grade sarcasm, the pond could revert to the more reliable notion of calling the Caterist a government-subsidised fuckwit, but where's the fun in that?
Back in simpler times, the pond used paper straws and thought nothing of it - now there's a use for recycled lizard Oz rags - and we took baskets to the store, or were supplied goods in paper bags - now there's a use for recycled lizard Oz rags - and littering was viewed as socially reprehensible, and over-indulgence in sugar, which led to bloated feelings of nausea, was treated as problematic.
Everything in moderation, including moderation, was the Wildean motto … and perhaps the pond should follow it by moderating its intake of Caterism ...
Without so much as a footnote?
Physician and Caterist, heal thyself by offering footnotes …
You know, there must be something somewhere out there, apart from industry spruikers, that offers hardcore evidence worth footnoting for the wonders of coal and the virtues of climate science denialism, the joys of plastics in oceans, and the benefits of sugar for diabetes …
No doubt up there with the notion that a dose of STDs was responsible for improved, enhanced Caterist thinking in the area of taking precautions for a healthy body and a healthy planet ...
There is of course abundant alternative reading material available out there on the full to overflowing intertubes, as in Plastic and how it affects our oceans, but there seems no good reason to introduce actual data into the discussion …
Instead it's time to celebrate the news that bicycle riding of all kinds will soon be coming to a climax, with Rowe on hand to evoke the Tour de Oz, and as always with more Rowe here …
Goosebumos Cater: "It is unlikely that banning plastic straws and single-use bags will make a noticeable difference to the amount of plastic in the ocean."
ReplyDeleteIsn't it wondrous that in Cater's world, nothing - reducing emissions or banning plastics - ever makes "a noticeable difference". One is gently led to think that mayhap the banning of Caterist reptiles would equally not make "a noticeable difference".
And Cater again: "On a global scale, the impact of Australian plastic waste is insignificant."
Yep, that's the reptile formula once again: anything we Aussies do is by definition and by practice, negligible. So screw the Great Barrier Reef, to the Caters of this world, its loss would be "insignificant".
Only a few years ago lead paint was just fine for painting kiddy's cot, and asbestos was a healthy way to insulate our homes, now it seems that not satisfied with this eccentric argument, so called scientists and do-gooders have set out to ruin the drinking straw industry as well. THIS IS THE THIN EDGE OF THE WEDGE!
ReplyDeleteMy god he's a prime fool.
But he didn't mention how Good Queen Bess used to paint her face with lead (well, actually ceruse, a mixture of white lead and vinegar).
DeleteAnd yes he is. Looking forward to the September judgement.
You can add smoking, analgesic abuse, CFCs and many others. History doesn't suggest these campaigns were unnecessary panics, it suggests that the facts firm up over time, the outcomes improve and life doesn't end because granddad cannot throw salt on everything (though I do know of a case where the opposite was true).
DeleteOk, ok, I'll bite: tell us all about the "opposite".
DeleteOne of my in-laws made it a point of honour to eschew all informed advice about diet and exercise, constantly rolled out anecdotes about old bill who smoked and drank his way into retirement etc etc etc - died of a massive heart attack in his first year of retirement.
DeleteMy point is that the pattern is there, it is always there, but people don't want a disturbing truth, they want to be told to go on doing what they are doing.
The reptiles of course are just paid tools and should be ignored.