Sunday, September 09, 2018

In which separation anxiety makes the pond miss prattling Polonius ...


The separation anxiety was something fierce … and then the pond wilted at the sight of Polonius prating away on The Insiders this morning …

Even on a break, how could the pond ignore Polonius? 

There he was imagining what might happen if he turned up in the UK - perhaps to pursue a job as au pair in the Royal household - and be turned away at the border, and then he turned to explaining how the bullying of women in the Liberal party was a procedural issue.

Malcolm had broken the rules by demanding a list of names, and what could a red-blooded Liberal male do than turn feral and bully the nearest female in reach? 

It was just in their nature, and it only came out in the witching hour thanks to the wretched Malware.

And he topped it all off by accusing Bob Woodward of being unprofessional, for daring to record the poor, persecuted, put-upon Donald, and no matter that he'd told the Donald he was being recorded and the Donald had lied, claiming that Woodward had never tried to reach out …

Polonius was on fire, and what excuse could the pond offer for ignoring Polonial pleasures, the most sacred of pond delights?

Well the pond will continue erratic and off the early morning shift for the rest of the week, but every so often, the pond must phone home to make sure all is well, and there's every good change that this week,  Polonius's idle chatter about the way that the Liberal party empowers complimentary women might produce an astonishing amount of irony-laden soup …


Of course this is the day that Gladys woke to news of being caned in Wagga Wagga but it seems that the reptiles have decided that Polonius is so dull he's in urgent need of pictorial accompaniment …

As for Ming the Merciless, the pond was moved to tears at the way the important role of complimentary women in preparing cheese and cucumber sandwiches for the men was recognised at an early stage … though sssh, please, whatever we do, don't mention dripping wets like Amanda Vanstone, who show what happen when complimentary women get fancy airs above their station ...


Oh dear did the reptiles have to mention Mandy? But as for the rest, what a triumph … two women in cabinet …

Two out of eighteen! Will the equality never stop giving?

But please let us also remember that at the time one of the great triumphs of equality, Bronnie, was in the outer ministry, and she would chopper on to even more glorious success ...


Yes, the Liberal party is an equal opportunity organisation when it comes to deadheads, dropkicks and losers, and even though the reptiles have graced Polonius with a shot of a triumphantly smiling Bronnie, the pond felt the need for even more visual pleasures …



Uh huh, and Polonius plays the "women have a really good time in the Liberal party" card, and so to the last Polonial gobbet …


Women rampant, and it's true, our Gladys has shown she doesn't just have the skills to comprehensively fuck up Sydney, she also knows how to be completely on the nose in Wagga Wagga …

And of course once the pond gets the taste of blood in its mouth, the urge to celebrate loonery becomes over-whelming …

Look at this at the top of the digital page ...


A weakening of young minds, and it's not just masturbation that's doing it?

Yep, it was the standard sort of reptile 'shouting at clouds and the young' routine that the pond treats as a kind of Sunday ice-cream …


Hmm, the pond can understand the reptile desire to provide visual illustrations, but are they suggesting that Claire is scribbling in furious support of a troll of the Milo kind? 

Speaking, as she seems to be, of the signs of deteriorating mental health that might be detected in narcissist, rabid attention seekers of the worst kind seeking their Warholian fifteen minutes of enormously stupid fame …

But the pond gets where Claire is coming from. It behoves young folk to sit at the feet of their elder and wiser folk, who would never offer misguided ideas or demented tweets …


As for the rest, it's the usual anal-retentive litany of complaints about young people daring to disagree … damn you, cheeky useless young folk, you're triggering Claire and she's starting to sound hysterical …


Indeed, indeed, and what a relief that older and wiser folk in the US aren't driven by ideology and a hunger for power …




What's even more remarkable is the way that Claire manages to sound alarmingly illiberal about anyone having any ideas that are remotely different from hers … and thinks nothing, in a megalomaniacal way, of accusing others of megalomania ...


Uh huh, just another narcissist attention-seeker after 15 minutes of Warholian fame, but even worse, apparently Claire has something to do with something using "-ette" in the name …

That reminded the pond of the particular contempt it reserves for that particular form of diminutive, as in majorette, usherette, coquette, and sermonette (dictionary here).

It's as irritating as the use of -ess in words such as poetess, sculptress, actress, hostess, and all the other bullshit variations offered up to complimentary women as a way of pretending their work isn't the same as that done by men (dictionary here). 

It should be possible for a woman to say "fuck Claire and the quillette horse she rode in on" as easily as a man … and now here's a few more role models for young folk aspiring to a proper Claire understanding of the world …






7 comments:

  1. "It's as irritating as the use of -ess in words such as poetess, sculptress, actress, hostess..."

    Yes, but DP what about that intriguing little problem defined as being able to list words such that when one 's' is added to the end, it forms the plural and when a second 's' is added to the end, it forms the female.

    So, we have: prince, princes, princess. And the only other one I can even vaguely think of is Abbe, Abbes, Abbess. Well, sort of.

    Now, can anyone think of an example of that progression that doesn't rely on '-ess' ?

    But apart from that, I would like to praise the idea of resilient uni kids and campus followers. I would point to the time at Kent State in Ohio (May 4th, 1970 to be precise) when the Ohio Stare Guard - those noble defenders of democracy and free speech - opened fire at a student demonstration killing four students. But the key thing is that two of those students weren't even involved in the demo, they were just walking from one class to their next. But oh, what resilience, ignoring all danger, not needing safe spaces or trigger warnings (which is just as well since the troops don't make or give any).

    Yep, that just shows how much better things were when the social and psychological forebears of Claire Lehmann ran the world.

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  2. A true triumph for Polonius today. As he notes, Enid Lyons was indeed Australia's first female Cabinet Member. And just what vital portfolio did she occupy? Well, according to the Australia Dictionary of Biography -

    "Re-elected with increasing majorities in 1946 and 1949, Dame Enid was sworn in as vice-president of the executive council in December 1949, thus becoming the first woman member of a Federal cabinet. Although it was a significant honour she was disappointed, having hoped for a portfolio. She later complained that it was 'a toothless position', doubting that Menzies wanted her in cabinet at all: 'they only wanted me to pour the tea'. "

    http://adb.anu.edu.au/biography/lyons-dame-enid-muriel-14392

    Still, I'm sure she poured many a cuppa with skill and aplomb, remembering who took milk and who didn't, and that Artie Fadden liked a couple of extra sugars.

    "She resigned from cabinet on 7 March 1951 and did not contest the next election."

    A brilliant, 15 month career, after which it was a mere 24 years and nine months - not even a quarter of a century! - until the next Tory Cabinet Minister.

    Yes, that's a proud record of progress and equality, Polonius style.

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    1. And you know, I'll bet they thought they were doing her a kind of favour - in remembrance of her husband most likely - but that certainly didn't extend to the risk of actually giving her any kind of real office, such as even a minor ministry.

      They really do like their pointless, and basically insulting, little gestures - as obviously well understood by Dame Enid herself. And entirely par for the course that Polonius would carry on as though it was praiseworthy.

      Fascinating that Australia was one of the very first places (in 1903) to not only allow women to vote, but also to actually stand for election. So, Dame Enid (replacing her hubby) to the House of Reps and Dorothy Tangney to the Senate, both in 1943 (well, they obviously weren't suitable for the Women's Land Army) just 40 years later.

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    2. I think a young University student and future leader of the Liberal Party of Australia, by name A. Abbott (Mr., of course) said it all in the 1970s: "I think it would be folly to expect that women will ever dominate or even approach equal representation in a large number of areas simply because their aptitudes, abilities and interests are different for physiological reasons”

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    3. Ah yes, the impeccable wisdom of the purblind young.

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  3. Yes - I am always dismayed when I see Polonius' beagle-like countenance on Insiders. It means I will have to try to follow his contorted, cock-eyed, reasoning.

    In order to have any sort of sensible discussion you really need to have some shared understandings and, hopefully, values. In Polonius' case not much at all is shared. Mention civility or respect and the shoulders just shrug and the jowls wobble. Now the minutia of Liberal party custom - that's sacred. If you don't follow custom you obviously get what you deserve.

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    1. Oh well, there is some shared understanding, Bef; we understand them only too well. But it just doesn't work the other way 'round, does it, though clearly it is one of their core delusions that they think it does.

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