Friday, July 20, 2018

Goodbye to some of that ...

The pond started blogging ten years ago, on 20th July 2008. It was a Sunday, and the pond went into a brooding fit because Michael Duffy had scribbled some nonsense about evangelicals ...ironical really, as the pond woke this morning to Andrew West attempting to get evangelical Xian Mike Pompeo to disavow fundamentalist, human rights abusing Saudi Arabia, and after a brief evasion, copping an interview termination notice …

Stupidity and hypocrisy never ends, but ten years is a long, long time to wallow in it…

… and now the pond is cutting back on its reptile addiction, back to a single post each day in the morning.

Aquarium owners will know the feeling if they've ever woken up one morning to find the tank full of fish floating belly up … do they re-stock, or do they embark on a useful, meaningful life?

When the pond started, it had some regrets about trolling the Duffster, but he went on to a better life out of the spotlight, and in a way, the pond became the victim … as the pond's mind has long been overgrown with useless reptile trivia and arcana …

And for what? Usually lavish doses of hysteria and alarmism about all the wrong and irrelevant things…

Of course there will be losses and regrets, but for those who've wondered how the pond keeps accessing the reptiles, here's a few tricks.

First the old trick of clearing cache, googling up a story and clicking on it still works for some. 

For reasons that puzzle the pond, the reptiles insist on allowing access to prattling Polonius this way, presumably because he's generally a waste of space and with no meaningful value to the brand.

Second with cache cleared, if a tweet is brought up to full page by clicking at the head of it, a further couple of clicks will usually result in a link to the text. Of course this only produces stories the reptiles have tweeted about, and the reptiles are useless at social media.

Third, if a story really appeals, there's always this site, which will deliver a de-cluttered version because the reptile paywall isn't as hard as it pretends to be. All that's needed is the piece's address, from www to end of letters and numbers, cut and pasted and hey presto …

The pond regarded this as unsporting, and had hoped that its campaign, in lieu of bankruptcy, might produce a harder paywall of The Times/WSJ kind, but the hapless locals still want to be part of a conversation …

The pond makes no guarantee how long any of these tricks will last, and doesn't really much care.

Hopefully the SEO mob at the lizard Oz will address the tricks, introduce a really hard paywall, and produce an appropriately apartheid digital experience which will result in the reptiles being isolated from the world.

Cutting back will mean sacrifices, but the pond gave up the Devine and Akker Dakker some time ago, and what a blissful sense of relief that produced … 

The pond realises the gravity of giving up a hobby … there will be some dreadful choices to make …

Today for example, there was the Tudge, determined to return Australia to the days of the language tests and the attitudes of the white Australia policy …

And how sad it is to leave behind Bjorn and the Oz editorialist … not ...

Yes, there's something to be said for selectively culling the stupid …

And so to the pond's one dining experience for the day, and the pond is very pleased that our Henry, 'hole in the bucket' Ergas, is the guest at the pond's birthday party …much better than any kind of celebratory card ...


Our Henry showed all the class breeding that qualifies a reptile for the pond's once a day slot …

First he's been blessed by the Lobbecke of the day, an infallible sign of very unique* status (*licensed from ABC24) … and was promoted to top of the rotating digital reptile slot ...

Even better, our Henry has at last gone the full Donald …

Indeed, indeed, so what better solution than to get into bed with Vlad the impaler?

Useless fools need willing tools, and our Henry is very willing ...

And there you go … roll that Henry-ism around on your tongue …

Vladimir Putin's message has the ring of truth … 

Godwin's Law prevented the pond from imagining our Henry celebrating Il Duce for making the trains run on time.

The pond always suspected Fox News and the lizards of Oz aspiring to full Pravda status, and our Henry shows how it might be done ...

The pond always thought our Henry was a little strange, and getting stranger as time passed, but this howl at the moon, this full-blown display of rampant Trumpism was a wonderful birthday gift for the pond, and surely full justification for the pond weeding out the detritus so that only the brightest jewels might glint in the morning light …

Of course there will be other dilemmas in this weeding and culling. 

What do do when the infallible Pope returns, to joust with the infallible Rowe for attention?

Luckily the infallible Pope continues on holiday, so the dilemma can be put off for another day … and luckily the infallible Rowe, as always more here, offers a tidy little thought for our Henry …

And that is that for our Henry and his Tzar wars, and now the pond can go off and do useful things for the day … with best wishes for those who also have useful things to do. Up against reading the reptiles, a snooze is better than as good as it gets ...


  1. Ah, DP, "all flesh is grass" so they say. I came to loonpond after you'd finished with the Duffles (though I have read some of your 'back numbers') and gone 'global reptile', and I've greatly enjoyed every day of it. I can but hope that sometimes the reptiles will yet again raise your ire sufficently to get an occasional impassioned 'second swipe' on a day. But just one per day is way better than none ... though what will I do with all the free time each day that I'll now have ?

    Anyway, on with the circus:

    Dear Henry: "Ultimately, what matters is whether a working relationship is restored between the two countries [USA and Russia], as Trump has sought to do."

    Errr, when exactly did the USA and Russia (or the USSR as it was better known) ever have a "working relationship" to restore ? Very briefly between Reagan and Gorbachev perhaps ? For a brief time during and shortly after WWII perhaps (Yalta anyone ?).

    But never mind, Henry, Russia still transports astronauts - including Americans - up to the International Space Station (that Trump wants to "privatise") and they don't fly spy planes over each other's territory and Russia's reclamation of Crimea didn't start WWIII ... so really, even without Trump the USA and Russia have about as good a "working relationship" as is necessary.

    1. Thanks GB and thanks for your many comments over the years, happily reminding the pond that sanity and intelligence does exist in pockets around the land.

      I've actually got other things to do and the reptiles started to get in the way. Better just to cull the beasts down to a manageable level. The weekends will be the biggest challenge - who could resist the full flowering of Trumpism in the likes of Henry?

    2. Oh (blush) my pleasure entirely, DP.

      But yes, times change, and people change, sometimes in harmony, but often not. So I do hope your "other things to do" work out well; and if they don't, or you get bored, or the reptiles really get up your nose or whatever, your appreciative audience will still be here, delighting in your company.

  2. Hi Dorothy
    We do appreciate how hard you have worked to bring us the facts and truth of the Murdochracy lies.

    1. Thanks WW, the pond claims no credit, the reptiles do it pretty much by themselves. As for the lies, the pond is sadly no Hercules or Sisyphus …there's too much shit in the stables and rocks rolling down hills for anyone to handle.

  3. A decade of contribution DP. ( and is today a birthday for you as well ??? )

    1. Would that it were the pond's birthday Anon, but as the pond holds to the Humpty Dumpty rule, this is another day in the 364 days of unbirthday celebrations the pond schedules each year.

  4. Hi Dorothy,

    Happy Birthday for your Blog and thank you for all your hard work. I must admit to some disappointment that our reptile diet is to be curtailed but it will at least keep us leaner and hungrier for more.


    1. thanks DW, and in the hope of making you blush for your kind attendance at the pond's herpetarium, take my response to GB and apply it to your good self!

  5. Ten years of selfless sacrifice should be celebrated. I'm sure you have something appropriate organised (even if it's no more than a cup of tea and a nice lie down).
    Your efforts are deeply appreciated. Thank you, thank you, thank you.


    1. Psst that's " a cup of tea, a Bex and a good lie down", Anony. Otherwise known as "Bex (and other APC products such as Vincent's) powders were particularly seen as the housewife's drug of choice in the 1950s and 1960s".

      And our DP is nothing if not a traditionalist. :-)

    2. thank you zoot, and the pond is a traditionalist, but takes no position on Bex v. Vincents - since both helped an uncle die of kidney failure - and so accepts your offer, and will settle for chairman Mao's belief that tea was the best way to clean your teeth:

      Mao never bathed or even washed his hands or face. Dr. Li says that during the day his bodyguards went into the room and wiped his body, his hands and his face with hot towels. He never brushed his teeth, which Dr. Li says were coated with a green patina. Mao's habit, shared by many peasants in China, was to wash his mouth in the morning with tea and then to eat the tea leaves. When, once, Dr. Li suggested to him that he should use a toothbrush, Mao's reply was, "A tiger never brushes his teeth."

  6. Thanks from me as well. I am always amazed at your output. Your comments are invariably cogent and readable whereas the source material is often near unintelligible. I struggle to make sense out of even the carefully selected gobbets let along read the original dross.

    Anyway, once a day is fine by me.

    Incidentally, I have been getting a bit of a laugh of late from hyperbole surrounding politics. Consider Trump "Our relations with Russia have never been worse". Trump was definitely around in 1962? Remember "drop and cover". Or Nigel Farage "the biggest insult to a sitting US president ever". Well, Nigel wasn't around when British troops burnt the White House.

  7. Happy anniversary and sad selfish regrets that you will be cutting back, of what has been a fabulous and entertaining mission you have had.

    Still, who am I to complain? I did enjoy many of our early banters, most notably my recollections of the Rev KF Kitto in Adelaide and his mission, as President of The Lord's Day Observance Society to prevent people enjoying themselves in the Adelaide Parklands on a Sunday. Somehow it seemed a more innocent occupation than what the Angry Sydney Anglicans or Lyle Shelton were trying to thrust on us.

    But time moves on for all of us. I have triumphed over Lymphoma last year and recovery has been fine, apart from, at my age of 76, losing some of my stamina to keep up with all your posts. Often I've found myself wanting to comment but outside the 2-day limit normally allowed. But I am grateful for your energy and determination to address the most dangerous threat there has been to reasoned thought of the public. GrueBleen, Diddy and others have filled that gap that I might've left in any event.

    But it has been a wonderful service you have given, not least because you have managed to remain humorous for so long when many such as me might have despaired. We are still in a dark place, but I have some hopes that we may improve over time.

    Thanks for helping us retain our sanity by observing the insanity and vanity of so many others.

  8. Jarijari said...
    Well done Dorothy. 10 years picking over what's left of a rotting corpse is a tough gig. Here's a Firefox add-on that works well on the likes of the NYT, WSJ, The Times, the New Yorker and The Economist, as well as the wretched old bastard's other shameless rags:

  9. Happy anniversary DP. Jesus,that was a fast 10 years. As one who has been a daily consumer over 9 years of what I consider the best blog in the land, I can understand the desire to cut back on Loon wrangling, particularly as the reptiles actually seem to be rapidly approaching the rapture state.

    I've cut back on comments of late as my tablet only accommodates comments via Opera and the book keeper says I can't afford a new laptop, plus I'm just an old tech numpty.

    Your output is a bloody marvel that helps maintain a bit of sanity in the age of idiocy and language abuse...your a gem, as are your regular contributors.

    The idiot at no.15.

    1. Oh dear, Anony, I called up another tab to watch Hiatt, and at the side, Youtube threw this one up too:

      Arlo Guthrie (and Pete Seeger) after all these years.


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